Arthur was born on May 25, 1987.


David: Is she gonna be all right, doctor?

Doctor: Yes. She has to push. Push-push-push-push-push. (finally, the baby pops out of Jane's stomach) Good job, Jane! Is it a boy or a girl?

David: It's a boy. We will name him Arthur.

Jane: I like it. Arthur it is.

(age 1)

David: It was Christmas on 1988. See my son? Arthur was wanting gifts.

Arthur: I want an old man's broom! (x3) I SAID I WANT AN OLD MAN'S BROOM!!

Jane: Sorry, Arthur. You can't.

Arthur: This is not fair, mom. I want it next year.

Jane: Well, all right.

(age 3)

Mr. Ratburn: Okay, class. At snack time, would you like milk and cookies?

Buster: Yeah-yeah. I would!

Arthur: No! No, Buster! I would take milk and cookies!

Mr. Ratburn: Arthur?!

Arthur: Um, yes, Mr. Ratburn?

Mr. Ratburn: That's not the right way to share milk and cookies.

Arthur: Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Ratburn. That is not sharing.

Mr. Ratburn: Maybe you will share milk and cookies next week.

Arthur: Okay. (sighs)

(age 4)

David: (gasps) Look, Jane! A tornado!

Jane: Yikes! (the tornado picks Arthur's parents away)

David and Jane: AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Arthur: Oh, no! Mom! Dad! (sighs) I think they're dead.

(R.I.P.: Jane and David (1963 - 1991))

(age 5)

Arthur: I have my foster parents. Their names are Winifred and Cedric.

Winifred: Hello, Arthur.

Cedric: Hiya, son. (chuckles)

Arthur: And this is my baby sister, D.W.

D.W.: Hi, Arthur. I'm D.W.

Arthur: Hi.

(age 5.5)

Arthur: My foster dad goes to jail for 555 million years. Then my new foster dad comes from United Kingdom. His name is Gaylord.

Gaylord: Hello. (chuckles)

Arthur: And my foster mom doesn't go to jail for 555 million years.

Gaylord: (in British accent) You've understood a word?

Arthur: Yes, dad.

Winifred: Arthur, meet my new husband Gaylord. My old husband Cedric goes to jail, but I don't.

Arthur: Oh.

(age 7)

Arthur: Dad, is your wife having a baby?

Gaylord: Yes, Arthur. See? Your baby sister. Her name is Abigail.

Arthur: Oh! Abigail has the same beginning letter as me!

(age 9)

Arthur: My younger sister D.W. sings a lot of songs. Wanna listen?

D.W.: (singing) La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

Gaylord: All right, D.W. No more singing or you're grounded for 60 days.

D.W.: Grounded for 60 days? And no more singing? That's not fair.

Gaylord: Go to bed! You're so grounded for life!

Arthur: Aw, poor D.W.

(age 25)

Arthur: I love candy! (x11)

Gaylord: Arthur! Go to your room and no candy for 90 billion and one years!



Air Date

August 23, 2012

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