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Ash Breaks the Rules & Other Stories is an Ash & Friends spoof to the 1990 Thomas and Friends video entitled: Thomas Breaks The Rules & Other Stories. It is composed of two Season 1 episodes and five Season 2 episodes narrated by Ringo Starr for the US.

Description

Your favourite cartoon characters welcome you back to the magical land of YTV. Next stop - all new adventures as Raimundo gets into trouble while letting off steam, Alexander races DC Comics hero Superman to a surprise finish, and Ash gets covered in soot to boot! So come along on a train bound for a world that will delight young and old alike.

Cast

  1. Ash Ketchum as Thomas (Veronica Taylor)
  2. Kevin Keene as Edward (Matt Hill)
  3. Shaggy Rogers as Henry (Matthew Lillard)
  4. Terry McGinnis as Gordon (Will Friedle)
  5. Raimundo Pedrosa as James (Tom Kenny)
  6. Alexander "Alex" O'Connell as Percy (Chris Marquette)
  7. Jackie Chan as Toby (James Sie)
  8. Virgil Hawkins as Duck (Phil LaMarr)
  9. Superman as Harold (Tim Daily)
  10. Steven Ketchum as Sir Topham Hatt (Dan Green)
  11. A Miltank as Bluebell The Cow
  12. Beedrill as Troublesome Trucks
  13. Arcanine as Coaches
  14. Suzy as Annie (Megan Hollingshead)
  15. Pietra as Clarabel (Carol Jacobanis)
  16. Princess Kitana as Henrietta (Cree Summer)
  17. Wilhelmina Ketchum as Lady Hatt (Amy Birnbaum)

Episodes

  1. Ash Breaks The Rules
  2. A Miltank On The Line
  3. Old Iron
  4. Double Trouble
  5. Raimundo In A Mess
  6. Virgil Takes Charge
  7. Alex Proves A Point

Transcript

Ash Breaks The Rules

  • Ringo Starr: There's a line to the university at the end of Ash's route. It goes to some distance along the road. Ash was very careful to whistle here in case anyone was coming. Early one morning, a large policeman was sitting close to the line. Ash liked policemen. He had been a great friend of the officer who had just retired.
  • Ash: Peep! Peep!
  • Ringo Starr: He whistled.
  • Ash: Good morning.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash expected that the new officer would be friendly too. But was sorry to see that he didn't look friendly at all. He was red in the face and very cross.
  • Policeman: Disgraceful!
  • Ringo Starr: He spluttered.
  • Policeman: I didn't sleep a wink last night. It was so quiet, and now trainers come whistling suddenly behind me.
  • Ash: I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Ash.
  • Ash: I only said good morning.
  • Ringo Starr: The policeman pointed to Ash.
  • Policeman: Where's your cowcatchers?
  • Ringo Starr: He asked.
  • Ash: But I don't catch cows, sir.
  • Policeman: Don't be funny.
  • Ringo Starr: Snapped the policeman. He looked at Ash's shoes.
  • Policeman: No side plates either.
  • Ringo Starr: And he wrote in his notebook.
  • Policeman: Trainers goin on public roads must have their shoes covered and a cowcatcher in front to protect people and animals from being dragged under the wheels if they stray under the line. You haven't so you are dangerous.
  • Driver: Rubbish.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Ash's driver.
  • Driver: We've been along here hundreds of times and never had an accident.
  • Policeman: That makes it worse.
  • Ringo Starr: The policeman answered. He wrote Regular Law Breaker in his book. Ash puffed sadly away. Steven was having breakfast he was eating toast and marmalade. The butler came in.
  • Butler: Excuse me, sir, you're wanted on the telephone.
  • Steven: Bother that telephone!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • (Phone chattering)
  • Steven: I'm sorry, my dear.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to his wife.
  • Steven: Ash is in trouble with the police and I must go at once.
  • Ringo Starr: At the station, Ash's driver told Steven what had happened.
  • Steven: Dangerous to the public indeed. We'll see about that.
  • Ringo Starr: Steven spoke to the policeman. But however much he argued with him it was no good.
  • Policeman: The law is the law.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Policeman: And we can't change it.
  • Ringo Starr: Steven felt exhausted.
  • Steven: I'm sorry, driver.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Steven: It's no use arguing with the policeman. We will have to make those cowcatcher things for Ash I suppose.
  • Ash: Everyone will laugh, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Ash.
  • Ash: They say I look like a J-Team.
  • Ringo Starr: Steven stared, then he laughed.
  • Steven: Well done, Ash. Why didn't I think of it before. We want a J-Team. When I was on my holiday, I met a nice man called Jackie. He takes Beedrill from the farms but the trucks have taken most of his work and he needs a change. He has a blue shirt and brown pants. I'll write to this superintedant at once.
  • Ringo Starr: A few days later, Jackie arrived.
  • Steven: That's a good man.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: I see you brought Princess Kitana.
  • Jackie: You don't mind, do you, sir?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Jackie.
  • Jackie: The stationmaster wanted to use her as a hen house, and that would never do.
  • Steven: No indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: We couldn't allow that.
  • Ringo Starr: Jackie made the silly Beedrill even better than Ash did.
  • Policeman: Oi you!
  • Ringo Starr: At first, Ash was jealous, but he was so pleased when Jackie rang his bell and frightened the policeman, they've been firmed friends ever since.

A Miltank On The Line

  • Ringo Starr: Kevin was getting old. His bearings were worn, and he clanked as he puffed along. He was taking empty Beedrill to a market town. The sun shone, birds sang, but Kevin was heading for trouble.
  • Kevin: Come on! Come on!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed.
  • Beedrill: Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Screamed the Beedrill. Kevin puffed and clanked, the Beedrill rattled and screamed. Some Miltank were grazing near by. They were not used to trains. The noise and smoke disturbed them. As Kevin clanked by, they broke through the fence and ran across the line. A coupling was broken and some Beedrill were left behind.
  • (Miltank mooing)
  • Ringo Starr: Kevin felt a jerk, but didn't take much notice. He was used to Beedrill.
  • Kevin: Bother those Beedrill!
  • Ringo Starr: He thought.
  • Kevin: Why can't they come quietly?
  • Ringo Starr: He was at the next station before either he or his driver realized what had happened. When Terry and Shaggy heard about the accident, they laughed and boasted.
  • Terry: Fancy allowing Beedrill to break his train! They wouldn't dare do that to us. We'd show them!
  • Ringo Starr: Old Jackie was cross.
  • Jackie: You couldn't help it, Kevin. They've never met Miltank. I have, and I know the trouble they are.
  • Ringo Starr: Some days later, Terry rushed through Kevin's Station.
  • Terry: Boop boop! Mind the Miltank! Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Terry.
  • Pets: Don't make such a fuss! Don't make such a fuss!
  • Ringo Starr: Grumbled his pets. A long stretch a line lay ahead. In the distance was a bridge. It seemed to Terry that there was something on the bridge. His driver thought so too.
  • Terry's Driver: Whoa, Terry!
  • Ringo Starr: He said, and shut off steam.
  • Terry: Pooh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry.
  • Terry: It's only a Miltank! Shooh! Shooh!
  • Ringo Starr: He moved slowly on to the bridge, but the Miltank wouldn't "Shooh"! She had lost her calf, and felt lonely.
  • Miltank: Mooooh!
  • Ringo Starr: She said sadly. Everyone tried to send her away, but she wouldn't go. Shaggy arrived.
  • Shaggy: What's this? A Miltank? I'll soon settle her. Be off! Be off!
  • Miltank: Mooooh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the Miltank. Shaggy backed away nervously.
  • Shaggy: I don't want to hurt her.
  • Ringo Starr: At the next station, Shaggy's Conductor told them about the cow, and warned the signalman that the line was blocked.
  • Porter: That must be Bluebell.
  • Ringo Starr: Said a porter.
  • Porter: Her calf is here, looking for her mother. Alex will take her along.
  • Ringo Starr: At the bridge, Bluebell was very pleased to her calf again, and the porter led them away.
  • Shaggy: Not a word.
  • Terry: Keep it dark.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered Terry and Shaggy to each other. They felt rather silly, but the story soon spread.
  • Kevin: Well, well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Kevin.
  • Kevin: Two big characters afraid of a Miltank.
  • Terry: Afraid? Rubbish.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry.
  • Terry: We didn't want the poor thing to hurt herself by running up against us. We stopped so as not to excite her. You see what mean, my dear Kevin.
  • Kevin: Yes, Terry.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Kevin. Terry felt somehow that Kevin "saw" only too well.

Old Iron

  • Ringo Starr: One day, Raimundo had to wait at the university till Kevin and his groceries came in. This made him cross.
  • Raimundo: Late again!
  • Ringo Starr: Kevin laughed and Raimundo fumed again. After Raimundo had finished his work, he went back to the yard, and puffed on to the turntable. He was still feeling very bad tempered.
  • Raimundo: Kevin is impossible!
  • Ringo Starr: He grumbled to the others.
  • Raimundo: He clanks about like a lot of old iron and he is so slow, he makes us wait!
  • Ringo Starr: Ash and Alex were indigment.
  • Alex: Old iron?! Slow?!
  • Ash: Why, Kevin could beat you in a race any day!
  • Raimundo: Really!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Raimundo.
  • Raimundo: I should like to see him do it. Next morning, Raimundo's driver was suddenly taking ill. He could hardly stand, so the fireman uncoupled Raimundo ready for shunting. Al was impatient. Suddenly, the signalman shouted. There was Raimundo puffing away down the line.
  • Signalman: All traffic halted!
  • Ringo Starr: He announced at last. Then he told the fireman what had happened.
  • Signalman: Two boys were on Raimundo's footplate fiddling with the controls.
  • Fireman: Whew.
  • Signalman: They tumbled off and ran when Raimundo started.
  • (Phone rings)
  • Ringo Starr: The signalman answered the telephone.
  • Signalman: Yes? He's here? Right, I'll tell him. The inspector's coming at once. He wants a shunter's pole and a coil of wire rope.
  • Fireman: What for?
  • Ringo Starr: Wondered the fireman.
  • Signalman: Search me, but you better get them quickly.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman was ready when Kevin arrived. The inspector saw the pole and a rope.
  • Inspector: Good man, jump in.
  • Kevin: We'll catch him, we'll catch him.
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Kevin. Raimundo was laughing.
  • Raimundo: What a lark! What a lark!
  • Ringo Starr: He chuckled to himself. Suddenly, he was going faster and faster. He realized that he had no driver.
  • Raimundo: What shall I do? I can't stop! Help! Help!
  • Kevin: We're coming, we're coming!
  • Ringo Starr: Called Kevin. Kevin was panting up behind with every ounce of steam he had. At last, he caught up with Raimundo
  • Kevin's Driver: Steady, Kevin.
  • Ringo Starr: Called his driver. The inspector stood on Kevin's front holding a noose of rope in the crook of the shunter's pole. He was trying to slip it over Raimundo's buffer. The characters swayed and lurched. At last...
  • Inspector: Got him!
  • Ringo Starr: He shouted. He pulled the noose tight. Gently braking, Kevin's driver checked the characters' speed, and Raimundo's fireman scrambled across and took control.
  • Kevin: So the old iron caught you after all.
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Kevin.
  • Raimundo: I'm sorry.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered Raimundo.
  • Raimundo: Thank you for saving me. You were splendid, Kevin.
  • Kevin: That's all right.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Kevin. The characters arrived at the station side by side. Steven was waiting.
  • Steven: A fine piece of work.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Steven: Raimundo, you can rest, and then take your train. I'm proud of you, Kevin. You shall go to the works and have your worn parts mended.
  • Kevin: Oh, thank you, Sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Kevin.
  • Kevin: It'll be lovely not to clank.

Double Trouble

  • Ringo Starr: It was a beautiful morning on the land of YTV.  Ash Ketchum's smart clothes sparkled in the sunshine, as he strolled happily along his route with Suzy and Pietra. He was feeling very pleased with himself.
  • Alex: Hello, Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Whistled Alex.
  • Alex: You look splendid.
  • Ash: Yes indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Boasted Ash.
  • Ash: Blue is the only proper color for a trainer.
  • Jackie: Oh, I don't know. I like my brown paint.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jackie.
  • Alex: I've always been green. I wouldn't want to be any other color either.
  • George Carlin: Added Alex.
  • Ash: Well, well, anyway.
  • Ringo Starr: Huffed Ash.
  • Ash: Blue is the only color for a really useful trainer. Anyone knows that.
  • Ringo Starr: Alex said no more. He just grinned at Jackie. Later, Ash was resting when Alex arrived. A large hopper was loading his Beedrill full of coal. Ash was still being cheeky.
  • Ash: Careful.
  • Ringo Starr: He warned.
  • Ash: Watch out with those silly Beedrill.
  • Beedrill: Go on, go on!
  • Ringo Starr: Muttered the Beedrill.
  • Ash: And by the way.
  • Ringo Starr: Went on Ash.
  • Ash: Those buffers don't look really safe to me.
  • Ringo Starr: The last load poured down.
  • Ash: Help, help!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Ash.
  • Ash: Get me out!
  • Ringo Starr: Alex was worried, but he couldn't help laughing. Ash's smart clothes was covered in coal dust from smokebox to bunker.
  • Alex: Ha, ha!
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Alex.
  • Alex: You don't look really useful now, Ash. You look really disgraceful.
  • Ash: I'm not disgraceful.
  • Ringo Starr: Choked Ash.
  • Ash: You did that on purpose. Get me out!
  • Ringo Starr: It took so long to clean Ash that he wasn't it time for his next train. Jackie had to take Suzy and Pietra.
  • Suzy: Poor Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered Suzy to Pietra. They were most upset. Ash was grumpy in the shed that night. Jackie thought it made a great joke, but Alex was cross with Ash for thinking he had made his paint dirty on purpose.
  • Alex: Fancy a really useful blue trainer like Ash becoming a disgrace to Steven's railway.
  • Ringo Starr: Next day, Ash was feeling more cheerful, as he watch Alex bring his Beedrill from the junction. The Beedrill were heavy and Alex was tired.
  • Driver: Have a drink.
  • Ringo Starr: Said his driver.
  • Driver: Then you'll feel better.
  • Ringo Starr: The water column stood at the end of the siding with the unsafe buffers. Suddenly, Alex found that he couldn't stop. The buffers didn't stop him either.
  • Alex: Ooh!
  • Ringo Starr: Wailed Alex.
  • Alex: Help!
  • (Alex falls into the deep coal)
  • Ringo Starr: The buffers were broken and Alex was wheel deep in coal. It was time for Ash to leave. He had seen everything.
  • Ash: Now Alex has learned his lesson too.
  • Ringo Starr: He chuckled to himself. That night, the two characters made up their quarrel.
  • Alex: I didn't cause your accident on purpose, Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered Alex.
  • Alex: You do know that, don't you?
  • Ash: Of course.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Ash.
  • Ash: And I'm sorry I teased you. Your green paint look splendid again too. In future, we're both be more careful of coal.

Raimundo In A Mess

  • Ringo Starr: Jackie and Princess Kitana are enjoying their new job on the land of YTV. But they do look old fashioned and need new paint. Raimundo was very rude whenever he saw them.
  • Raimundo: Yech! What dirty objects!
  • Ringo Starr: He would say. At last, Jackie lost patience.
  • Jackie: Raimundo
  • Ringo Starr: He asked.
  • Jackie: Why are you red?
  • Raimundo: I am a splendid boy.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Raimundo.
  • Raimundo: Ready for anything. You never see my paint dirty.
  • Jackie: Oh.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jackie earnestly.
  • Jackie: That's why you once needed bootlaces to be ready I suppose.
  • Ringo Starr: Raimundo went redder than ever and snorted off. It was such an insult to be remind how the time the bootlace have been use to mend a hole in his coaches. At the end of the line, Raimundo left his coaches and got out to his next train. It was a slow freight, stopping at every station to pick up and set down Beedrill, Raimundo hated slow freight trains.
  • Raimundo: Dirty Beedrill from dirty sidings! Yech!
  • Ringo Starr: Starting an only a few, he picked up more and more Beedrill at each station till he had a long train. At first, the Beedrill behaved well, but Raimundo bumped them so crossly that they were determined to get back at him. Presently, they approached the top of Terry's Hill. Heavy freight trains halt here to set the brakes. Raimundo had had an accident with Beedrill before and should have remembered this.
  • Driver: Wait, Raimundo, wait!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the driver, but Raimundo wouldn't wait. He was too busy thinking what he would say to Jackie when they next met. The Beedrill's chance had come.
  • Beedrill: Hurrah! Hurrah!
  • Ringo Starr: They laughed, and banging their buffers they pushed him down the hill.
  • Beedrill: On, on, on!
  • Ringo Starr: Yelled the Beedrill.
  • Raimundo: I've got to stop, I've got to stop!
  • Ringo Starr: Groaned Raimundo. Through the station they thundered, disaster lay ahead.
  • (Raimundo crashes into the tar wagons)
  • Ringo Starr: Something sticky splashed all over Raimundo. He had run into two tar wagons, and was black from smokebox to cab. He was more dirty than hurt, but the tar wagons and some cars were all to pieces. Jackie and Alex were sent to help and came as quickly as they could.
  • Jackie: Look here, Alex!
  • Ringo Starr: Explained Jackie.
  • Jackie: Whatever is that dirty object?
  • Alex: That's Raimundo, didn't you know?
  • Jackie: It's Raimundo's shape.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jackie.
  • Jackie: But Raimundo is a splendid boy and you'll never see his paint dirty.
  • Ringo Starr: Raimundo pretended he hadn't heard. Jackie and Alex cleared away the unhurt Beedrill and help Raimundo home. Steven met them.
  • Steven: Well done, Alex and Jackie.
  • Ringo Starr: He turned to Raimundo.
  • Steven: Fancy letting your Beedrill run away. I am surprised. You're not fit to be seen. You must be cleaned at once. Jackie shall have a new coat of paint.
  • Jackie: Please sir, can Kitana have one too?
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jackie.
  • Steven: Certainly, Jackie.
  • Jackie: Oh thank you, sir. She will pleased.
  • Ringo Starr: All Raimundo could do as watch Jackie as he ran off happily with the news.

Virgil Takes Charge

  • Alex: Do you know what?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Alex.
  • Terry: What?
  • Ringo Starr: Grunted Terry.
  • Alex: Do you know what?
  • Terry: Silly!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry.
  • Terry: Of course I don't know what. If you don't tell me what what is.
  • Alex: Steven says that the work in the yard is too heavy for me. He's getting a bigger character to help me.
  • Raimundo: Rubbish!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Raimundo.
  • Raimundo: Any character could do it. If you work hard and chatterless, this yard would be a sweeter, a better and a happier place.
  • Ringo Starr: Alex went off to get some pets.
  • Alex: That stupid old traffic light.
  • Ringo Starr: He thought. He was remembering the time he misunderstood a traffic light and gone backwards instead of forwards.
  • Alex: No one listens to me now. They think I'm a silly little kid and order me about. I'll show them, I'll show them.
  • Ringo Starr: But he didn't know how. By the end of the afternoon, he felt tired and unhappy. He brought some pets to the station.
  • Steven: Hello, Alex.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: You look tired.
  • Alex: Yes sir, I am sir. I don't know if I'm standing on my head or on my feet.
  • Steven: You look the right way up to me.
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed Steven.
  • Steven: Cheer up. The new character is bigger than you and can properly do the work alone. Would you like to help build my new harbour? Ash and Jackie will help.
  • Alex: Oh yes, sir. Thank you, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: The new character arrived.
  • Steven: What's your name?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Steven.
  • Virgil: Montague, sir, but I'm usually called Virgil. They say I waddle. I don't really, sir, but I like Virgil better than Montague.
  • Steven: Good. Virgil it shall be. Here, Alex, show Virgil around.
  • Ringo Starr: The two characters went off together. Soon they were very busy. Raimundo, Terry and Shaggy watched Virgil quietly doing his work.
  • Shaggy: He seems a simple sort of character.
  • Raimundo: We'll have some fun and order him about.
  • Shaggy, Terry and Raimundo: (quacking noises) Wheesh!
  • Ringo Starr: Smoke billowed everywhere. Alex was cross, but Virgil took no notice.
  • Virgil: They'll get tired of it soon. Do they tell you to do things, Alex?
  • Alex: Yes they do.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Alex.
  • Virgil: Right.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Virgil.
  • Virgil: We'll soon stop that nonsense.
  • Ringo Starr: He whispered something.
  • Virgil: We'll do it later.
  • Ringo Starr: Steven was looking forward to hot buttered toast for tea at home. Suddenly, he heard an extroitnary noise.
  • Shaggy, Terry and Raimundo: Wheesh! (snorting noises)
  • Steven: Bother!
  • Ringo Starr: He said and hurried to the yard. Virgil and Alex calmly sat on the switches outside the shed, refusing to let the characters in. Terry, Raimundo and Shaggy were furious.
  • Steven: Stop that noise!
  • Ringo Starr: Bellowed Steven.
  • Terry: They won't let us in!
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Terry.
  • Steven: Virgil, explain this behavior.
  • Virgil: Beg pardon, sir, but I'm a teenager. We do our work without fuss, but begging your pardon, sir. Alex and I will be glad if you like to inform these, um, characters that we only take orders from you.
  • (Raimundo and Terry blew their whistles loudly)
  • Steven: Quiet!
  • Ringo Starr: Called Steven.
  • Steven: Alex and Virgil, I am pleased with your work today, but not with your behavior tonight. You have caused a disturbance.
  • Ringo Starr: Terry, Shaggy and Raimundo sniggered.
  • Steven: As for you.
  • Ringo Starr: Thundered Steven.
  • Steven: You've been worse. You made a disturbance. Virgil is quite right. This is my railway and I give the orders.
  • Ringo Starr: After Alex went away, Virgil was left to manage alone. He did so...easily!

Alex Proves A Point

  • Ringo Starr: Alex worked hard at the new university. The workmen needed stone for their building. Jackie helped, but sometimes the loads of stone were too heavy and Alex had to fetch them for himself. Sometimes he'd see Ash.
  • Ash: Well done, Alex. Steven is very pleased with us.
  • Ringo Starr: An airfield was closed by. Alex heard the airplane zooming overhead all day. The noises of all was a superhero.
  • Alex: Stupid thing!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Alex.
  • Alex: Why can't and go and buzz somwhere else?
  • Ringo Starr: One day, Alex stopped at the airfield.
  • Alex: Hello.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Alex.
  • Alex: Who are you?
  • Superman: I'm Superman.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the superhero.
  • Superman: Who are you?
  • Alex: I'm Alex. What whirly great arms you've got.
  • Superman: They're nice arms.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Superman.
  • Superman: I can hover like a bird. Don't you wish you could hover?
  • Alex: Certainly not. I like my rails, thank you.
  • Superman: I think railways are slow.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Superman.
  • Superman: They're not much use and quite out of date.
  • Ringo Starr: He whirled his arms and buzzed away. Alex found Jackie at the quarry.
  • Alex: I say Jackie. That Superman, that stuck up whirlybird thing, says I'm slow and out of date. Just let him wait. I'll show him.
  • Ringo Starr: He collected his Beedrill and started off still fuming. Soon, they heard a familar buzzing.
  • Driver: Alex.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered his driver.
  • Driver: There's Superman. He's not far ahead. Let's race him.
  • Alex: Yes, let's.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Alex. Alex pounded along, the Beedrill screamed and swayed.
  • Driver: Well, I'll be a ding-dong dang!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the driver. There was Superman. The race was on!
  • Driver: Go it, Alex!
  • Ringo Starr: He yelled.
  • Driver: You're ganging!
  • Ringo Starr: Alex had never been allowed to go fast before. He was having the time of his life.
  • Alex: Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: He panted to the Beedrill.
  • Beedrill: We don't want to, we don't want to.
  • Ringo Starr: They grumbled. It was no use. Alex was bucketing along with flying wheels and Harold was high and alongside. The fireman shoveled for dear life.
  • Driver: Well done, Alex!
  • Ringo Starr: Shouted the driver.
  • Driver: We're ganging! We're going ahead! Oh good boy, good boy!
  • Ringo Starr: A distant signal warned them that the harbour wharf was near.
  • Alex: Peep peep peep! Brakes, conductor, please?
  • Ringo Starr: The driver carefully checked the train's headlong speed. They rolled onto the main line, and haulted on the wharf.
  • Alex: Oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: Groaned Alex.
  • Alex: I'm sure we've lost.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman scrambled to the cab roof.
  • Fireman: We've won, we've won!
  • Ringo Starr: He shouted.
  • Fireman: Superman's still hovering. He's looking for a place to land. Listen, boys.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman called.
  • Fireman: Here's a song for Alex. (singing) Said Superman to our Alex you are slow. Your railway is out of date and not much used you know, but Alex and his stone cars did the trip in record time, and we beat the helicopter on our old branch line.
  • Ringo Starr: Alex loved it.
  • Alex: Oh, thank you!
  • Ringo Starr: He said. He liked the last line best of all, and was a very happy kid.

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