Barney/Thomas Parody 1: BJ Learns A Lesson

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  • Barney as Thomas
  • BJ as James
  • Riff as Edward
  • Thomas (from Thomas & Friends) as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Homer (from The Simpsons) as The Conductor
  • Mr. Smithers (from The Simpsons) as The Man
  • Top Hat (from TUGS) as James' Driver
  • Ringo Starr as Narrator


  • Ringo Starr: BJ was enjoying his life at the school. But he still had a lot to learn.
  • Thomas: You're a special mixed traffic dinosaur.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Thomas.
  • Thomas: You can pull wagons and barges quite easily, but you must learn from your mistakes.
  • Ringo Starr: BJ knew what Thomas meant. He could well remember that dreadful accident on his first day.
  • Riff: Be careful with the wagons, BJ.
  • Ringo Starr: Said kind little Riff.
  • Riff: They don't like being bumped.
  • Ringo Starr: Everyone came to see BJ.
  • BJ: I'm a really splendid dinosaur.
  • Ringo Starr: He said and suddenly blew bubbles. A shower fell on Thomas' new blue funnel. Just then, Homer blew his whistle and BJ thought they'd better go.
  • BJ: Go on, go on!
  • Ringo Starr: He said to Riff.
  • Riff: Don't push, don't push!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Riff. The wagons were grumbling too.
  • Wagons: Don't go so fast, don't go so fast!
  • Ringo Starr: But BJ didn't listen. When at last they stopped at the station, two wagons were beyond the platform. They had to go back to drop the passengers off. No one seemed to know about Thomas' new funnel. So BJ felt happier. Presently, they reached the station where Barney was waiting with his two wagons.
  • Barney: Hello BJ. Feeling better? That's right. (Homer blows his whistle) Oh, that's Homer's whistle. I must go, I don't know what Thomas would do without me to run this branchline.
  • Ringo Starr: And he ran off importantly. Riff and BJ went past the field where BJ had had his accident. The fence was mended and the cows were back again. They ended their journey and rested before setting off for home. BJ was still wondering what Thomas would say about funnel. (Riff and BJ head off for home) Next morning, he spoke severly to BJ.
  • Thomas: If you can't behave, I will take away your yellow coloring and have you be green.
  • Ringo Starr: BJ didn't like that all. He was very rough with the wagons as he brought them to the platform.
  • BJ: Don't talk! Come on!
  • Ringo Starr: He called to them.
  • BJ: Carlos never has to fetch his own wagons.
  • Ringo Starr: He thought to himself.
  • BJ: And he only wears green.
  • Ringo Starr: To make BJ even more cross, this time no one came near him.
  • BJ: I'll show them. They think Carlos is the only one who can pull wagons. Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: Said BJ.
  • Wagons: You're going too fast, you're going too fast.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the wagons. BJ laughed and tried to go faster. But the wagons wouldn't let him.
  • Wagons: We're going to stop, we're going to stop.
  • (They come to a stop)
  • BJ: What's the matter?
  • Ringo Starr: BJ asked Top Hat.
  • Top Hat: The breaks are hard on. Leak in the pipe most likely. You banged the wagons enough to make a leak in anything.
  • Homer: How should we ment it?
  • Ringo Starr: Said Homer.
  • Top Hat: We'll do it with newspaper and a leather bootlace.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Top Hat.
  • Homer: But where is the bootlace coming from?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Homer.
  • Top Hat: Ask the passengers.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Top Hatt.
  • Homer: You have a leather bootlace, don't you sir?
  • Ringo Starr: Said Homer to Mr. Smithers.
  • Homer: Please give it to me.
  • Mr. Smithers: I won't.
  • Narrator: Said Mr. Smithers.
  • Homer: Then, I'm afraid that we shall have to stop where we are.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Homer.
  • Ringo Starr: The passengers were all saying what a bad school it was. Then they told Mr. Smithers how bad he was instead. Everyone was very cross. At last, he handed his laces over. Top Hat tied a pad of newspaper tightly around the hole in the train pipe and BJ was able to pull the wagons. But he was a sader and wiser BJ and took care never to bump wagons again.

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