Bart and Budgie and Other Stories, later renamed The Runaway and Other Stories is a TV/Thomas parody of the Thomas and Friends UK/AUS video, Percy and Harold and Other Stories/The Runaway and Other Stories. It features eight second season episodes of RS Mr. Conductor the Conductor and Friends narrated by Ringo Starr.


  • RS Mr. Conductor (Shining Time Station) as Thomas
  • Edd (from Ed, Edd n Eddy) as Edward
  • Homer (from The Simpsons) as Henry
  • Garfield (from Garfield and Friends) as Gordon
  • Schemer (from Shining Time Station) as James
  • Bart (from The Simpsons) as Percy
  • Spike (from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) as Duck
  • Mario (from Mario) as Donald
  • Luigi (from Mario) as Douglas
  • Mr. Burns (from The Simpsons) as Diesel
  • Tex (from Shining Time Station) as Bill (not named)
  • Rex (from Shining Time Station) as Ben (not named)
  • Patty (from The Simpsons) as Annie
  • Selma (from The Simpsons) as Clarabel
  • Ernie the Giant Chicken (from Family Guy) as The Spiteful Brakevan
  • Ten Cents (from TUGS) as Bertie
  • Scooby Doo (from Scooby Doo) as Terence
  • Budgie (from Budgie the Little Helicopter) as Harold
  • Goombas (from Mario) as The Troublesome Trucks
  • Mayor Adam West (from Family Guy) as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Mr. Ratburn (from Arthur) as The Inspector
  • Elmer Fudd (from Looney Tunes) as The Barber
  • Grandpa Dave (from Arthur) as Toby (does not speak)
  • Sunshine (from TUGS) as Trevor (cameo)
  • Mrs. Twombly (from Littlest Pet Shop (2012)) as Mrs. Kyndley (cameo)
  • Sally Acorn (from Sonic the Hedgehog) as The Storyteller (cameo)


  1. Bart and Budgie
  2. The Runaway
  3. Bart Takes the Plunge
  4. Pop Goes the Rich Man
  5. Dirty Work
  6. A Close Shave
  7. Better Late Than Never
  8. Ernie


Bart and Budgie

Narrator: "Bart worked hard at the new harbor. The workmen needed stone for their building. Grandpa Dave helped, but sometimes the loads of stone were too heavy, and Bart had to fetch them for himself. Sometimes he'd see RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Well done Bart. Mayor Adam West is very pleased with us."

Narrator: "An airfield was close by. Bart heard the airplanes zooming overhead all day. The noisiest of all was a helicopter."

Bart: "Stupid thing!"

Narrator: "Said Bart."

Bart: "Why can't it go and fly somewhere else?"

Narrator: "One day, Bart stopped at the airfield."

Bart: "Hello."

Narrator: "Said Bart."

Bart: "Who are you?"

Budgie: "I'm Budgie."

Narrator: "Said the helicopter."

Budgie: "Who are you?"

Bart: "I'm Bart. What whirly great arms you've got."

Budgie: "They're nice arms. I can hover like a bird. Don't you wish you could hover?"

Bart: "Certainly not. I like my road, thank you."

Budgie: "I think roads are slow."

Narrator: "Said Budgie."

Budgie: "They're not much use and quite out-of-date."

Narrator: "He whirled his arms and buzzed away.

Bart found Grandpa Dave at the quarry."

Bart: "I say, Grandpa Dave. That Budgie, that stuck-up whirlybird thing, says I'm slow and out-of-date. Just let him wait. I'll show him."

Narrator: "He collected his goombas and started off, still fuming.

Soon they heard a familiar sound."

Bart's Driver: "Bart,"

Narrator: "Whispered his driver."

Bart's Driver: "There's Budgie. He not far ahead. Let's race him."

Bart: "Yes, let's!"

Narrator: "Said Bart.

Bart pounded along. The goombas screamed and swayed."

Bart's Driver: "Well, I'll be a ding-dong-danged!"

Narrator: "Said the driver. There was Budgie. The race was on!"

Bart's Driver: "Go it, Bart!"

Narrator: "He yelled."

Bart's Driver: "You're gaining!"

Narrator: "Bart had never been allowed to run fast before. He was having the time of his life."

Bart: "Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!"

Narrator: "He panted to the goombas."

Goombas: "We don't want to, we don't want to."

Narrator: "They grumbled. It was not use. Bart was bucketing along with flying feet. And Budgie was high and alongside.

The fireman shoveled for dear life."

Bart's Driver: "Well done, Bart!"

Narrator: "Shouted the driver."

Bart's Driver: "We're gaining! We're going ahead! Oh, good boy, good boy!"

Narrator: "A distant signal warned them that the harbor wharf was near."

Bart: "Peep, peep, peep! Brakes, guard, please."

Narrator: "The driver carefully checked Bart's speed.

They rolled under the main road and halted on the wharf."

Bart: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "Groaned Bart."

Bart: "I'm sure we've lost."

Narrator: "The fireman scrambled to the roof."

Bart's Fireman: "We've won! We've won!"

Narrator: "He shouted."

Bart's Fireman: "Budgie's still hovering. He's looking for a place to land.

Listen, boys."

Narrator: "The fireman called."

Bart's Fireman: "Here's a song for Bart:

Said Budgie Helicopter to our Bart, "You are slow! Your road is out of date, and not much use you know!" But Bart and his goombas did the trip in record time, And we beat the helicopter on our old branch line!"

Narrator: "Bart loved it."

Bart: "Oh, thank you!"

Narrator: "He said. He liked the last line best of all and was a very happy boy."

The Runaway

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor was ill. Workmen had tried to make him better, but it was no use."

Mayor Adam West: "Edd must take you to the works."

Narrator: "Said Mayor Adam West.

RS Mr. Conductor felt very miserable.

Then, Mayor West spoke to Spike."

Mayor Adam West: "I want you to help Bart and Grandpa Dave while RS Mr. Conductor is away."

Narrator: "Spike was delighted.

He already knew Bart, and soon made friends with Grandpa Dave and Ten Cents. Scooby Doo gave him a big welcome too."

Scooby Doo: "Take care of RS Mr. Conductor's sisters-in-law."

Narrator: "He advised."

Scooby Doo: "He's sure to miss them while he's away."

Narrator: "Spike was very gently with the sisters-in-law. Patty and Selma were impressed."

Patty and Selma: "Such nice manners."

Narrator: "They told each other."

Patty and Selma: "It really is a pleasure to go out with him."

Narrator: "When RS Mr. Conductor came back, Patty and Selma told him how well Spike had managed. RS Mr. Conductor was so please to be home that he soon forgot to be jealous.

The works had left RS Mr. Conductor's feet very stiff. It made his feet seem as if they weren't moving, when in fact they were.

As a result, he and his sisters-in-law often over ran the platform. RS Mr. Conductor found this most embarrassing.

Gradually, his driver and fireman learned to be extra careful. But one day, RS Mr. Conductor's fireman was ill and a relief man took his place.

The fireman had tied the ropes, and joined the driver and stationmaster on the platform to wait for Homer's passengers. The fireman had forgotten all about RS Mr. Conductor's feet. RS Mr. Conductor simmered happily."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Not long now."

Narrator: "He thought, as he saw Homer slowly approaching.

But then, RS Mr. Conductor felt his feet begin to move. He tried to stop, but he couldn't without his driver and fireman. He tried to whistle a warning, but he couldn't do that either. The guard, driver, fireman and passengers were all stranded on the platform."

Patty and Selma: "Stop, stop!"

Narrator: "Shrieked Patty and Selma. But RS Mr. Conductor, with plenty of energy, kept on going. The alarm went off down the path."

Signalman: "Stop the runaway!"

Narrator: "There, ready for action, was Budgie the Little Helicopter. Mr. Ratburn had made a plan, and together they took off into the sky.

At last, RS Mr. Conductor was tiring."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I need to stop, I need to stop."

Narrator: "He panted wearily.

As they neared the next station, RS Mr. Conductor saw Budgie land.

They entered the platform slowly enough for Mr. Ratburn to act. Judging his moment, Mr. Ratburn jumped near RS Mr. Conductor and stopped him.

At last, RS Mr. Conductor stopped. Both he and Mr. Ratburn were very relief. Then they thanked Budgie."

Budgie: "Thank nothing of it."

Narrator: "Whirled Budgie."

Budgie: "Glad to be of service anytime."

Mr. Ratburn: "Phew!"

Narrator: "Remarked Mr. Ratburn."

Mr. Ratburn: "We must never let this happen again, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "Wearily, RS Mr. Conductor agreed with him."

Bart Takes the Plunge

Narrator: "One day, Homer wanted to rest, but Bart was talking to some twins. He was telling them about the time he had braved bad weather to help RS Mr. Conductor."

Bart: "It was raining hard. Water swirled under my body. I couldn't see where I was going, but I struggled on."

Tex: "Oh, Bart, you are brave."

Bart: "Well, it wasn't anything really. Water's nothing to a TV Character with determination."

Rex: "Tell us more, Bart."

Homer: "What are you TV Characters doing here?"

Narrator: "Hissed Homer."

Homer: "This house is for Mayor Adam West's TV Characters. Go away! Silly things!"

Narrator: "Homer snorted."

Bart: "They're not silly!"

Narrator: "Bart had been enjoying himself."

Homer: "They are silly, and so are you. 'Water's nothing to a TV Character with determination.' Huh!"

Bart: "Anyway,"

Narrator: "Said cheeky Bart."

Bart: "I'm not afraid of water. I like it."

Narrator: "He ran off to the harbor singing: "Once a TV Character with some flowers was afraid of a few drops of rain"."

Homer: "No one ever lets me forget the time I wouldn't come out of the tunnel in case the rain spoiled my clothes."

Narrator: "Huffed Homer.

RS Mr. Conductor was looking at a board on the quay. DANGER!"

RS Mr. Conductor: "We mustn't go past it."

Narrator: "He said."

RS Mr. Conductor: "That's orders."

Bart: "Why?"

RS Mr. Conductor: "Danger means falling down something."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I went past danger once and fell down a mine."

Bart: "I can't see a mine."

Narrator: "Said Bart. He didn't know that the foundations of the quay had sunk. The path now sloped downward to the sea."

Bart: "Stupid board!"

Narrator: "Said Bart. Bart made a plan.

One day, he whispered to the goombas."

Bart: "Will you give me a bump when we get to the quay?"

Narrator: "The goombas had never been asked to bumped an TV Character before. They giggled and chattered about it."

Bart: "Driver doesn't know my plan."

Narrator: "Chuckled Bart."

Goombas: "On! On! On!"

Narrator: "Laughed the goombas. Bart thought they were helping."

Bart: "I'll pretend to stop at the station, but the goombas will push me past the board. Then I'll make them stop. I can do that whenever I like."

Narrator: "Every wise TV Character knows that you cannot trust goombas."

Goombas: "Go on! Go on!"

Narrator: "They yelled, and bumped Bart's driver and fireman down to the ground."

Bart: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Said Bart, sliding past the board. Bart was frantic."

Bart: "That's enough!"

(Bart falls into the sea)

Narrator: "Bart was sunk."

Mayor Adam West: "You are a very disobedient TV Character!"

Narrator: "Bart knew that voice."

Bart: "Please sir, get me out, sir. I'm truly sorry, sir."

Mayor Adam West: "No Bart, we cannot do that till high tide. I hope it will teach you to obey orders!"

Bart: "Yes sir."

Narrator: "It was dark when they rescued Bart. He too cold and stiff to move by himself.

Next day, he was sent to the hospital on Homer's goods delivery."

Homer: "Well! Well! Well!"

Narrator: "Chuckled Homer."

Homer: "Did you like the water?"

Bart: "No!"

Homer: "I am surprise. You need more determination, Bart. Water's nothing to a TV Character with determination, you know. Perhaps you will like it better next time."

Narrator: "Bart is quite determined that there won't be a next time."

Pop Goes the Rich Man

Narrator: "Spike is proud of being a dragon. He talks endlessly about it, but he works hard too, and makes everything go like clockwork. It was a splendid day.

The goombas and flowers behaved well, the passengers even stopped grumbling, but the animals didn't like having to bustle about."

Spike: "There are two ways of doing things,"

Narrator: "Spike told them."

Spike: "The Dragon Way, or the Wrong Way. I'm a dragon, and..."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "Don't we know it!"

Narrator: "They groaned.

The TV Characters were glad when a visitor came.

He purred smoothly towards them. Mayor West introduced him."

Mayor Adam West: "Here is Mr. Burns. I have agreed to give him a trial. He needs to learn, please teach him, Spike."

Mr. Burns: "Good Morning."

Narrator: "Purred Mr. Burns in an oily voice."

Mr. Burns: "Pleased to meet you, Spike. Is that Schemer, and Homer, and Garfield too? I am delighted to meet such famous TV Characters."

Narrator: "The silly TV Characters were flattered."

Bart, Schemer, Homer and Garfield: "He has very good manners."

Narrator: "They murmured."

Bart, Schemer, Homer and Garfield: "We are please to have him in our yard."

Narrator: "Spike had his doubts."

Spike: "Come on!"

Narrator: "He said. Mr. Burns purred after him."

Mr. Burns: "Your worthy Ad..."

Spike: "Mayor Adam West to you!"

Narrator: "Ordered Spike.

Mr. Burns looked hurt."

Mr. Burns: "Your worthy Mayor Adam West thinks I need to learn. He is mistaken. We rich men don't need to learn. We know everything. We come to a yard and improve it. We are revolutionary."

Spike: "Oh?"

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "If you're revo-thingummy, perhaps you would collect my goombas while I fetch Garfield's flowers."

Narrator: "Mr. Burns, delighted to show off, purred away.

When Spike returned, Mr. Burns was trying to take some goombas from a siding. They were old and empty. They have not been touched for a long time. Mr. Burns found them hard to move."

Mr. Burns: "Pull! Push! Backwards! Forwards!"

Goombas: "Oi! Oi!"

Narrator: "The goombas groaned."

Goombas: "We can't! We wont!"

Narrator: "Spike watched with interest.

Mr. Burns lost patience."

Mr. Burns: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "He roared, and gave a great heave. The goombas jerked forward."

Goombas: "Oh! Oh!"

Narrator: "They screamed."

Goombas: "We can't! We wont!"

Narrator: "Some of their joints snapped, and their legs jammed in the lower body."

Mr. Burns: "Grrrr!"

Spike: "Ho ho ho!"

Narrator: "Chuckled Spike.

Mr. Burns recovered and tried to push the goombas back, but they wouldn't move. Spike ran quietly around to collect the other goombas."

Spike: "Thank you for arranging these, Mr. Burns. I must go now."

Mr. Burns: "Don't you want this lot?"

Spike: "No thank you."

Narrator: "Mr. Burns gulped."

Mr. Burns: "And I've taken all this trouble? Why didn't you tell me?"

Spike: "You never asked me. Besides,"

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "You were having such fun being rev-whatever it was you said. Good-bye."

Mr. Burns: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "Mr. Burns had to help the workmen clear the mess.

He hated it. All the goombas were laughing and singing at him."

Goombas: "Goombas are waiting in the yard, tackling them with ease'll show the world what I can do, gaily boasts the Rich Man, in and out he creeps about, like a big blue weasel, when he takes the wrong goombas out, Pop goes the Rich Man!"

Mr. Burns: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "Growled Mr. Burns, and scuttled away to sulk in the house."

Dirty Work

Narrator: "Mr. Burns, the new TV Character, was sulking. The goombas would not stop singing rudely at him.

Spike was horrified."

Spike: "Shut up!"

Narrator: "He ordered, and bumped them hard."

Spike: "I'm sorry our goombas were rude to you, Mr. Burns."

Narrator: "Mr. Burns was still furious."

Mr. Burns: "It's all your fault! You made them laugh at me!"

Homer: "Nonsense!"

Narrator: "Said Homer."

Homer: "Spike would never do that. We TV Characters have our differences, but we'd never talk about them to the goombas. That would be dis... dis..."

Garfield: "Disgraceful!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Schemer: "Disgusting!"

Narrator: "Put in Schemer."

Homer: "Despicable!"

Narrator: "Finished Homer.

Mr. Burns hated Spike. He wanted him to be sent away, so he made a plan; he was going to tell lies about Spike.

Next day, he spoke to the goombas."

Mr. Burns: "I see you like jokes. You made a good joke about me yesterday, I laughed and laughed. Spike told me one about Garfield. I'll whisper it.

Don't tell Garfield I told you."

Narrator: "And he snickered away."

Goombas: "Ha ha ha!"

Narrator: "Guffawed the goombas."

Goombas: "Garfield will be cross with Spike when he knows.

Let's tell him and pay Spike out for bumping us!"

Narrator: "They laughed rudely at the TV Characters as they went by.

Soon, Garfield, Homer and Schemer found out why."

Garfield: "Disgraceful!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Schemer: "Disgusting!"

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Homer: "Despicable!"

Narrator: "Said Homer."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "We cannot allow it!"

Narrator: "They consulted together."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "Yes,"

Narrator: "They said."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "He did it to us, we'll do it to him, and see how he likes it!"

Narrator: "Spike was tired out.

The goombas had been cheeky and troublesome.

He wanted a rest in the house.

The three TV Characters barred his way."

Schemer: "Keep out!"

Spike: "Stop fooling!"

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I'm tired!"

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "So are we."

Narrator: "Hissed the TV Characters."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "We're tired of you. We like Mr. Burns. We don't like you. You tell tales about us to the goombas."

Spike: "I don't!"

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "You do!"

Spike: "I don't!

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "You do!"

Narrator: "Mayor Adam West came to stop the noise."

Garfield: "Spike called me a galloping sausage!"

Narrator: "Spluttered Garfield."

Schemer: "Rusty red scrap iron!"

Narrator: "Put in Schemer."

Homer: "I'm old square feet."

Narrator: "Fumed Homer."

Mayor Adam West: "Well, Spike?"

Narrator: "Spike considered."

Spike: "I only wish, sir,"

Narrator: "He said gravely,"

Spike: "That I'd thought of those names myself. If the scale fits..."

Mayor Adam West: "Ahem..."

Homer, Garfield and Schemer: "He made goombas laugh at us!"

Narrator: "Accused the TV Characters.

Mayor West recovered. He'd been trying not to laugh himself."

Mayor Adam West: "Did you, Spike?"

Spike: "Certainly not, sir. No dragon would be as mean as that!"

Narrator: "Mr. Burns lurked up."

Mayor Adam West: "Now, Mr. Burns, you heard what Spike said."

Mr. Burns: "I can't understand it, sir. To think that Spike, of all TV Characters... I'm dreadfully grieved, sir, but know nothing."

Mayor Adam West: "I see."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West.

Mr. Burns squirmed, and hoped he didn't."

Mayor Adam West: "I'm sorry, Spike, but you must go to Edd's station for a while. I know he will be glad to see you."

Spike: "As you wish, sir."

Narrator: "Spike trundled sadly away, while Mr. Burns smirked with triumph."

A Close Shave

Narrator: "Spike the Dragon puffed sadly to Edd's Station."

Spike: "It's not fair!"

Narrator: "He complained."

Spike: "Mr. Burns has been telling lies about me, and made Mayor West and all the TV Characters think I'm horrid."

Narrator: "Edd smiled."

Edd: "I know you aren't, and so does Mayor West. You wait and see. Why don't you help me with these goombas?"

Narrator: "Spike felt happier with Edd, and set to work at once.

The goombas were silly, heavy, and noisy. The two TV Characters had to work hard, pushing and pulling them all afternoon. At last, they reached the top of the hill."

Spike: "Good-bye!"

Narrator: "Whistled Spike, and rolled gently over the crossing to the other line.

Spike loved coasting down the hill, running easily with the wind whistling past. Suddenly, it was a guard's warning whistle!"

Goombas: "Hurrah, hurrah, hurrah!"

Narrator: "Laughed the goombas."

Goombas: "We've broken away! We've broken away! Chase him! Bump him! Throw him off the road!"

Narrator: "They yelled."

Spike's Driver: "Hurry, Spike, Hurry!"

Narrator: "Said the driver. They raced through Edd's station, but the goombas were catching up."

Spike's Driver: "As fast as we can, then they'll catch us gradually!"

Narrator: "The driver was gaining control."

Spike's Driver: "Another clear mile, and we'll do it!"

Spike: "Oh, glory, look at that!"

Narrator: "Schemer was just pulling out on their line from the station ahead. Any minute, there could be a crash!

Spike's Driver: "It's up to you now, Spike!"

Narrator: "Cried the driver.

Spike put every ounce of weight and strength against the goombas."

Spike: "It's too late!"

Narrator: "Spike groaned, and shut his eyes. He veered into a siding where Elmer Fudd set up shop. He was shaving a customer."


"The silly goombas had knocked their guard down, and left him far behind after he had whistled a warning.

But the goombas didn't care. They were feeling very pleased with themselves."

Spike: "Beg pardon, sir."

Narrator: "Gasped Spike."

Spike: "Excuse my intrusion."

Elmer Fudd: "No, I won't!"

Narrator: "Said Elmer Fudd."

Elmer Fudd: "You've frightened my customers! I'll teach you!"

Narrator: "And he lathered Spike's face all over. Poor Spike.

RS Mr. Conductor was helping to pull the goombas away, when Mayor Adam West arrived."

Elmer Fudd: "I do not like TV Charcters popping through my walls!"

Narrator: "Fumed Elmer Fudd."

Mayor Adam West: "I appreciate your feelings,"

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "But you must know that this dragon and his crew have prevented a very serious accident. It was a very close, um, shave."

Elmer Fudd: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Said Elmer Fudd."

Elmer Fudd: "Oh! Excuse me."

Narrator: "He filled a basin of water to wash Spike's face."

Elmer Fudd: "I'm sorry. I didn't know you were being a brave dragon."

Spike: "That's all right, sir. I didn't know that either."

Mayor Adam West: "You were very brave, indeed."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "I'm proud of you."

Narrator: "Mayor West watched the rescue operation, then he had more news for Spike."

Mayor Adam West: "And when you are properly washed and healed, you are coming home."

Spike: "Home, sir? Do you mean the yard?"

Mayor Adam West: "Of course."

Spike: "But sir, they don't like me. They like Mr. Burns."

Mayor Adam West: "Not now. I never believed Mr. Burns, so I sent him packing. The TV Characters are sorry and want you back."

Narrator: "A few days later, when he came home, there was a really rousing welcome for Spike the Dragon."

Better Late Than Never

Narrator: "The TV Characters were finding life difficult. Workmen were mending the viaduct on the main road.

The arches needed strengthening. Mayor Adam West did not want to close the land while the work was done. And so repairs took a long time.

The TV Characters had to take great care when crossing the viaduct. And the delay often made them late on their journey to the junction, where they knew RS Mr. Conductor would be waiting to collect his passengers.

RS Mr. Conductor grew crosser and crosser."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Time's time!"

Narrator: "He grumbled."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Why should I have to keep my passengers waiting while Homer and Schemer dawdle about all day on viaducts?"

Homer: "Don't blame me!"

Narrator: "Snorted Homer."

Homer: "If we hurry across the viaduct, it might collapse. And then you'd have no passengers at all. What would you do then?"

RS Mr. Conductor: "Make my deliveries on time for one thing!"

Narrator: "Retorted RS Mr. Conductor. He hurried away before Homer could answer.

Ten Cents was impatient too. He was timed to arrive just after RS Mr. Conductor. His passengers found that instead of going straight from their tug to their conductor, they were kept waiting till RS Mr. Conductor arrived.

Soon, Ten Cents grew cross with RS Mr. Conductor."

Ten Cents: "Late again!"

Narrator: "He remarked, as RS Mr. Conductor panted wearily in."

Ten Cents: "We maybe friends, but I thought you could go fast, RS Mr. Conductor. It's time we have another race. I reckon I can beat you now."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor blew gold dust loudly."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Rubbish!"

Narrator: "He hissed fiercely."

RS Mr. Conductor: "It's those main road TV characters! They dither about on their viaduct, and they blame Mayor West's workmen. It's just an excuse for laziness if you ask me!"

Narrator: "One day, Schemer was later than ever at the junction."

Schemer: "I'm sorry, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Schemer: "I was held up at the station, and the viaduct made it worse."

RS Mr. Conductor: "It's lucky for you I'm a guarantee connection!"

Narrator: "Grumbled RS Mr. Conductor. Before Schemer could answer, he puffed importantly away."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Come along, come along."

Narrator: "He panted to the sisters-in-law. Patty and Selma did their best, but RS Mr. Conductor soon found that he couldn't save much time.

Suddenly, RS Mr. Conductor saw Ten Cents ahead. His engine was steaming."

RS Mr. Conductor: "What's the matter?"

Narrator: "Asked RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "You should be at the station by now. You're late!"

Ten Cents: "I feel dreadful."

Narrator: "Moaned Ten Cents."

Ten Cents: "All upset inside, and driver says he can't make me better. Thank goodness you're late too. Can you take my passengers, please? They'll never get home otherwise."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Of course."

Narrator: "Agreed RS Mr. Conductor. He now felt sorry for Ten Cents, and promised to get help at the next station.

RS Mr. Conductor set off again. Already, he felt much more cheerful. And Ten Cents' passengers, traveling with Patty and Selma, all reach home safely.

When Ten Cents was better, he came to thank RS Mr. Conductor."

Ten Cents: "I'm sorry I teased you about being late."

Narrator: "He said."

RS Mr. Conductor: "That's alright."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm glad I could help. There are times when being late isn't such a bad thing after all."

Narrator: "With a last cheerful greeting, the two friends went back to work."


Narrator: "Mario and Luigi are brothers, and have arrived from the Mushroom Kingdom to help Mayor Adam West, but only one plumber had been expected. The brothers meant well, but did cause confusion. Mayor West had given them numbers; Mario 9, and Luigi 10, but he was still planning to send one plumber home.

There was a giant chicken named Ernie in the yard that had taken a dislike to Luigi. Things always went wrong when he had to take him out. His work was late, and he was blamed. Luigi began to worry.

Mario, his brother, was angry."

Mario: "You're a muckle nuisance!"

Narrator: "Said Mario."

Mario: "It's to leave you behind I'd be wanting!"

Ernie: "You can't."

Narrator: "Said Ernie."

Ernie: "I'm essential."

Mario: "Ach! Are you?"

Narrator: "Mario burst out."

Mario: "You're nothing but a screechin' and a noise when all's said and done. Spite Luigi, would you? Take that!"

Ernie: "Oh! Ow ow!"

Narrator: "Cried Ernie."

Mario: "There's more coming, should you misbehave."

Narrator: "Ernie behaved better after that. Until one day, Mario had an accident.

The road was slippery. He couldn't stop in time."


"Mayor West was most annoyed."

Mayor Adam West: "I am disappointed, Mario. I did not expect such, um... clumsiness from you.

I have decided to send Luigi back and keep you."

Mario: "I'm sorry, sir."

Narrator: "Said Mario."

Mayor Adam West: "I should think so, too. You have upset my arrangements. Now Schemer will have to help with the goods work, while you are mended. Schemer won't like that."

Narrator: "Mayor West was right. Schemer grumbled dreadfully."

Luigi: "Anyone would think,"

Narrator: "Said Luigi."

Luigi: "That Mario had his accident on purpose.

I heard tell about a man and some tar barrels."

Schemer: "Shut up!"

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Schemer: "It's not funny!"

Narrator: "He didn't like to be reminded of his own accident."

Luigi: "Well, well, well,"

Narrator: "Said Luigi,"

Luigi: "Surely, Schemer, it wasn't you. You didn't say!"

Narrator: "Schemer didn't say. He slouched sulkily away."

Ernie: "He's cross."

Narrator: "Snickered Ernie."

Ernie: "We'll try to make him crosser still."

Goombas: "Hold back!"

Narrator: "Giggled the goombas to each other.

Schemer did his best, but he was exhausted when they reached Edd's station.

Luckily, Luigi was there."

Schemer: "Help me up the hill, please." (Pant)

Narrator: "Panted Schemer."

Schemer: "These goombas are playing tricks."

Luigi: "We'll show them!"

Narrator: "Said Luigi.

Slowly but surely, the snorting TV Characters forced the goombas up the hill, but Schemer was losing strength."

Schemer: "I can't do it! I can't do it!"

Luigi: "Leave it to me!"

Narrator: "Shouted Luigi.

The guard was anxious."

Guard: "Go steady! Ernie's breaking!"

Narrator: "Ernie was in pieces.

No one had been hurt, and soon Edd came to clear the mess. Mayor West was on board."

Mayor Adam West: "I might have known it would be Luigi!"

Narrator: "He said."

Edd: "Luigi was grand, sir."

Narrator: "Said Edd."

Edd: "Schemer had no strength left, but Luigi worked hard enough for three. I heard him from my yard."

Mayor Adam West: "Two would have been enough."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "I want to be fair, Luigi, but... I don't know. I really don't know."

Narrator: "Mayor West was making up his mind about something. But that's another story."

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