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Characters and Turntables & Other Stories is a US VHS spoof to Tenders and Turntables & Other Stories, each containing six Season 1 episodes and one Season 2 episode told by Ringo Starr for US Audiences. It is made in September 1990.

Cast

  • Ash Ketchum (from Pokemon) as Thomas
  • Kevin Keene (from Captain N: The Game Master) as Edward
  • Peter Parker (from The Spectacular Spider-Man) as Henry
  • Scott Summers (from X-Men: Evolution) as Gordon
  • Al Smith (from Hoop-a-Joop) as James
  • Todd Daring (from The Replacements) as Percy
  • Marty McFly (from Back To The Future) as Toby
  • Lana Loud and Lola Loud (from The Loud House) as Annie and Clarabel
  • Marcella (from Legend Quest) as Henrietta
  • Miss Harper McCormick (from Wedding Peach) as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Joey Wheeler (from Yu-Gi-Oh!) as Lady Hatt
  • Dipper and Mabel Pines (from Gravity Falls) as Stephen and Bridget Hatt
  • Ozzy Jones and Drix Koldriliff (from Ozzy and Drix) as Donald and Douglas

Stories

  1. Characters and Turntables
  2. Trouble In The House
  3. Todd Runs Away
  4. Ash Comes To Breakfast
  5. Peter's Special Medicine
  6. The Flying Kipper
  7. Marty McFly

Notes

  • Narrated by Ringo Starr.
  • Release Date: September 27, 1990.
  • The Season 1 intro, nameplate sequence (1990-1992) and the outro are used together.
  • In the end credits a still picture from "Marty McFly" is used.
  • Distributed by Strand VCI Entertainment.

Opening Previews

  1. Strand VCI Tracking Control
  2. Strand VCI FBI Warning
  3. Strand VCI Entertainment logo (1988-1992)
  4. YTV Presents logo
  5. Ash and Friends Season 1 intro
  6. First few seconds of Characters and Turntables

Closing Previews

  1. Last few seconds of Marty McFly
  2. Ash and Friends outro

Opening Credits

  • ASH THE POKEMON TRAINER & FRIENDS
  • Based on The TV SHOWS by YTV
  • CHARACTERS & TURNTABLES
  • Told by RINGO STARR
  • Directed by DAVID MITTON

Cover Artwork

Front Cover

  • Ash with bush in his mouth from "Ash Comes To Breakfast"

Back Cover

  • Todd in the bank from "Todd Runs Away"

Cover Color

  • Yellow

Running Time

  • 35 Minutes

Description

  • PEEP! PEEP!

Script

Characters and Turntables

  • Ringo Starr: Peter and Scott were lonely when Ash left the yard to run his route. They missed him very much. They had more work to do and had to fetch their own Arcanine. The big characters thought they were too important to fetch Arcanine. Al grumbled, too.
  • Peter: We get no rest, we get no rest!
  • Ringo Starr: They all complained. But the coaches only laughed.
  • Coaches: You're lazy and slack, you're lazy and slack!
  • Ringo Starr: They answered. All together, the characters were causing Miss Harper a great deal of trouble. The big stations both ends on the line each have a turntable. Miss Harper had made them so that the tender characters can be turned round because it is dangerous for them to go fast and backwards. Little characters like Ash don't need turntables. They can go just as well backwards as forwards. But to hear Scott talk, he would've thought that Miss Harper had given him a tender just to show how important he was.
  • Scott: You don't understand, little Ash. We Big Characters have a position to keep up. It doesn't matter where you go, but we are important, and for Miss Harper to make us to shunting, fetch coaches and go on some of those dirty sidings it's, it's, well, it's not the proper thing.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash chuckled and went off with Lana and Lola.
  • Scott: Disgraceful!
  • Ringo Starr: Scott hissed as he ran backwards to the turntable. The turntable was in the windy place close to the sea, and he was not on it just right, he put amount of balance and made a difficult to turn. Today, Scott was in the bad temper, and the wind was blowing fiercly. His driver tried to make him stop in the right place but Scott wasn't trying. The fireman tried to turn the handle, but Scott's weight and the strong wind prevented him.
  • Driver: It's no good.
  • Ringo Starr: They said at last.
  • Driver: Your big tender upsets the balance. If you're a little character, you be all right. Now you have to pull the next train backwards.
  • Boys: Look!
  • Ringo Starr: Called some boys.
  • Boys: There's a new character! Oh, it's only Scott, back to front.
  • Ash: Hello!
  • Ringo Starr: Called Ash.
  • Ash: Playing little characters? Sensible character. Take my advice, scrap your tender and have a nice bunker.
  • Ringo Starr: Scott said nothing. Even Al laughed when he saw him.
  • Scott: Take care.
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Scott.
  • Scott: You might stick too.
  • Al: No fear.
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Al.
  • Al: I'm not so fat as you. I mustn't stick.
  • Ringo Starr: Thought Al. He stopped on just the right place to balance the table. It could now swing easily. Scott arrived and time to see everything. Al turned much too easily. The wind puffed him round like a top. He couldn't stop!
  • (Al spins faster and faster until he slows down, and as the turntable stops, he is all green and dizzy)
  • Scott: Well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Scott.
  • Scott: Are you playing roundabouts?
  • Ringo Starr: Poor Al feeling quite giddy rolled off to the shed without a word. That night, the three characters had an indignation meeting.
  • Scott: It's shameful to treat tender characters like this. Scott has to go backwards and people think he's a tank character, Al spins like a top and everyone laughs at us. And added to that, Miss Harper makes us all shunt in dirty sidings. Blech! Listen.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Scott. He whispered something to the others.
  • Scott: We'll do it tomorrow. Miss Harper will look silly.
  • Ringo Starr: The characters had decided to go on strike.

Nameplates after Characters and Turntables

  • Ash
  • Al
  • Scott
  • Kevin
  • Peter

Trouble In The House

  • Ringo Starr: Miss Harper McCormick sat in her office, listening to the noise outside. The passengers were angry. The stationmaster came in.
  • Stationmaster: There's trouble in the house, ma'am. Peter was sulking. There's no train and the passengers are saying this is a bad railway.
  • Harper: Indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Harper: We cannot allow that.
  • Ringo Starr: He found Scott, Al and Peter looking very cross.
  • Harper: Come along, Peter. It's time your train was ready.
  • Scott: Peter's not going!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Scott.
  • Scott: We won't shunt like little characters. That was Ash's job. We are important tender characters. You fetch our coaches and we will pull them. Tender characters don't shunt.
  • Harper: We'll see about that.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Harper: No character on my railway is too important for small jobs.
  • Ringo Starr: And she hurried away to find Kevin.
  • Harper: The yard has never been the same since Ash left to run his branch line.
  • Ringo Starr: She thought sadly. Kevin was shunting.
  • Harper: Leave those Beedrill please, Kevin.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Harper: I want to push coaches for me in the yard.
  • Kevin: Thank you, ma'am. That will be a nice change.
  • Harper: That's a good boy. Off you go then.
  • Ringo Starr: So Kevin found coaches for the three characters and that day, the train's ran as usual. But next morning, Kevin looked unhappy. Scott came clanking pass hissing rudely.
  • Harper: Bless me!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Harper: What a noise!
  • Kevin: They all hissed me, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Kevin.
  • Kevin: They say tender characters don't shunt and last night they said I have gray feet. I haven't have I, ma'am?
  • Harper: No Kevin, you have nice blue ones, and I'm proud of you. Tender characters do shunt, but all the same we do need another character here.
  • Ringo Starr: She went to the workshop and they showed them all sorts of characters. At last, he saw a smart little kid with orange hair.
  • Harper: That's the one.
  • Ringo Starr: She thought.
  • Harper: If I choose you, will you work hard?
  • Todd: Oh ma'am, yes ma'am.
  • Harper: That's a good boy. I'll call you Todd.
  • Todd: Yes ma'am, thank you ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Todd. And Miss Harper brought him back to the yard.
  • Harper: Kevin.
  • Ringo Starr: She called.
  • Harper: Here's Todd. Will you show him everything?
  • Ringo Starr: Todd soon learned what he had to do and they had a happy afternoon. Then Peter came by hissing as usual.
  • Todd: Wheesh!
  • Ringo Starr: Went Todd. Peter jumped and ran back to the shed.
  • Kevin: How beautifully you wheeshed him!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed Kevin.
  • Kevin: I can't wheesh like that.
  • Todd: Oh.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Todd.
  • Todd: That's nothing. You should hear them in the workshop. You have to wheesh loudly to make yourself heard.
  • Ringo Starr: Next morning, Ash arrived.
  • Ash: Miss Harper sent to me. I expect she wants help.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to Kevin.
  • Kevin: Sh, sh, here she comes.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Kevin.
  • Harper: Well done, Ash, you've been quick. Listen, Peter, Scott and Al are sulking they say they won't shunt like little characters, so I have shut them up and I want you both to run a line for a while.
  • Ash: Little characters indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Ash.
  • Ash: We'll show them.
  • Harper: And Todd will help too.
  • Todd: Oh ma'am, yes ma'am, please ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Todd. Kevin and Ash worked the main line greeting each other as they pass by. Todd puffed along the branch line. Ash was anxious about Lana and Lola, but both driver and conductor promise to take care of them. They were fewer trains but the passengers didn't mind. They knew the three other characters were having a lesson. Scott, Al and Peter were cold, lonely and miserable. They wish now they haven't been so silly.

Nameplates after Trouble In The House

  • Kevin
  • Sonic
  • Earthworm Jim
  • Peter
  • Todd
  • Marty

Todd Runs Away

  • Ringo Starr: Peter, Al and Scott were miserable. They had been shut up for several days for being naughty and longed to be let out again. At last, Miss Harper arrived.
  • Harper: I hope you are sorry.
  • Ringo Starr: She said.
  • Harper: And that you understand that every job on the railway is important. We have a new character named Todd who helps pull coaches and Ash and Kevin had worked the main line nicely, but I will let you now if you promise to work hard.
  • Scott: Yes ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the three characters.
  • Al: We will.
  • harper: That's right, but please remember that this no shunting nonsense must stop.
  • Ringo Starr: She then told Todd, Kevin and Ash that they can go and play on a branch line for a few days, and they ran off happily to find Lana and Loud at the junction. The two twins were very pleased to see Ash again. Kevin and Todd played with the Beedrill.
  • Beedrill: Stop, stop, stop!
  • Ringo Starr: Screamed the Beedrill as they pushed them to their proper sidings. But the two boys laughed and went on shunting till the Beedrill were tightling arranged. Next, Kevin took some empty Beedrill from the quarry. Todd was left alone. He didn't mind that a bit. He like watching trains and being cheeky to the other characters.
  • Todd: Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: He would call, and they got very cross. After a great deal of shunting, Todd was waiting for the signalman to set the switch so that he can go back to the yard. He was eager to work, but was being rather careless and not paying attention. Kevin had warned Todd.
  • Kevin: Be careful on the main line. Whistle to the signalman that you are there.
  • Ringo Starr: But Todd didn't remember to whistle, and so the busy signalman forgot him. Todd waited and waited. The switch were still against him so he couldn't move. Then, he looked along the main line.
  • Todd: Peep, peep!
  • Ringo Starr: He whistled in horror, for rushing straight towards him was Scott with the express.
  • Scott: Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Groaned Scott.
  • Scott: Get out of my way!
  • (Scott approaches Todd, who then shuts his eyes and the big character comes to a frightening halt)
  • Ringo Starr: Todd opened his eyes. Scott had stopped with Buster's buffers a few inches from his own. But Todd had begun to move.
  • Todd: I won't stay here, I'll run away!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed. He ran straight through Kevin's station, and was so frighetend that he ran right up Scott's hill without stopping. After that, he was tired, but he couldn't stop. He had no driver to shut off steam and applied his brakes.
  • Todd: I want to stop! I want to stop!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed. The man in the signalbox saw Todd was in trouble, so he kindly set the switch. Todd puffed wearly onto a nice empty siding, ending in a big bank of earth. He was too tired now to care where he went.
  • Todd: I want to stop, I want to stop! I have stopped!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed thankfully.
  • Workmen: Never mind, Todd.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the workmen as they dug him out.
  • Workmen: You shall have some drink and some coal and then you feel better.
  • Ringo Starr: Presently, Scott arrived.
  • Scott: Well done, Todd. You started so quickly that you stopped the nasty accident.
  • Todd: I'm sorry I was cheeky.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Todd.
  • Todd: You were clever to stop.
  • Ringo Starr: Then Scott helped pull Todd out from the bank. The two characters are now good friends, but Todd was always most careful that he goes out on the main line.

Nameplates after Todd Runs Away

  • Ash
  • Al
  • Scott
  • Todd
  • Marty

Ash Comes To Breakfast

  • Ringo Starr: Ash Ketchum has worked his route for many years and knows it very well.
  • Ash's Driver: You know just where to stop, Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed his driver.
  • Ash's Driver: You could almost manage it without me.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash had become conceited. He didn't realize his driver was joking. Later, he boasted to the others.
  • Ash: Driver says I don't need him now.
  • Ringo Starr: He told the others.
  • Todd: Don't be so daft!
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Todd.
  • Marty: I'd never go without my driver.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Marty earnestly.
  • Marty: I'd be frightened.
  • Ash: Puh!
  • Ringo Starr: Boasted Ash.
  • Ash: I'm not scared!
  • Dan: You'd never dare!
  • Ash: I would then, you'll see.
  • Ringo Starr: The next morning, the firelighter came. Ash drowsed comfortably, and the warmth spread through his body. Todd and Marty were still asleep. Ash suddenly remembered.
  • Ash: Silly stick-in-the-muds!
  • Ringo Starr: He chuckled.
  • Ash: I'll show them. Driver said I could manage without him. I'll just go out, then I'll stop and WHEESH! That'll make them jump.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash thought he was being clever. Really, he was only moving because a careless cleaner had meddled with his body. He soon found his mistake. He tried to wheesh, but he couldn't. He tried to stop, but he couldn't. He just kept rolling along. He didn't dare look at what was coming next; there was the principal's house. The principal was just about to have breakfast.
  • Ash: Horrors!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Ash, and shut his eyes. (CRASH!) The house rocked, broken glass tinkled, plaster was everywhere. Ash had collected a bush on his travels. He peered into the room through its leaves. He couldn't speak. The principal was furious. His wife picked up her plate.
  • Darkholme: You miserable trainer!
  • Ringo Starr: She scolded.
  • Darkholme: Just look what you've done to our breakfast! Now I shall have to cook some more!
  • Ringo Starr: She banged the door. More plaster fell. This time, it fell on Ash. Ash felt depressed. Workmen propped up the house with strong poles, and laid a path through the garden. Then the cells Ozzy and Drix arrived.
  • Drix: Don't worry yourself, Ash, we'll soon have you back on the path!
  • Ringo Starr: They laughed. Ozzy and Drix working hard, managed to haul Ash back to safety. Bits of fencing, a bush, and a broken window frame festooned his front, which was badly twisted. The cells laughed and left him. Ash was in disgrace. There was worse to come.
  • Harper: You in a lot of trouble, Ash.
  • Ash: I know, ma'am. I'm sorry, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash's voice was muffled behind his bush.
  • Harper: You must go to the workshop and have your front mended, it will be a long job.
  • Ash: Yes, ma'am.
  • Harper: Meanwhile, a girl from Hong Kong will do your work.
  • Ash: A G-g-girl, ma'am?
  • Ringo Starr: Ash spluttered.
  • Harper: Yes, Ash. Girls always stay in their houses until they are wanted. Girls never gallivant off to breakfast in principal's houses.

Nameplates after Ash Comes To Breakfast

  • Ash
  • Al
  • Scott
  • Peter
  • Kevin
  • Todd
  • Marty
  • Sonic
  • Earthworm Jim

Peter's Special Medicine

  • Ringo Starr: One morning Peter was feeling very sorry for himself. Sometimes, he can pull trains, but sometimes he felt he had no strength at all.
  • Peter: I suffer dreadfully and no one cares.
  • Al: Rubbish, Peter!
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Al.
  • Al: You don't work hard enough!
  • Ringo Starr: Miss Harper spoke to him too.
  • Harper: What's wrong with you, Peter? You have lots of new parts and new paint too, but they've done you no good. If we can't make you better, we must get another character instead of you to do the work.
  • Ringo Starr: This made Peter, his driver and fireman very sad. Miss Harper was waiting when Peter came to the platform. She had taken off her ??? and ??? and put on overalls. Peter managed to start but his fireman was not satisfied.
  • Fireman: Peter is a bad steamer.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to Miss Harper.
  • Fireman: I built up his fire, but it doesn't give enough heat.
  • Ringo Starr: Peter tried very hard, but it was no good. He didn't have enough steam, and came to a stop outside Peter's station.
  • Peter: Oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: Thought Peter.
  • Peter: I shall have to go away! Oh dear, oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: All he could do is to go slowly onto a siding, and Kevin took charge of the train. Miss Harper and the Fireman went on discussing Peter's troubles.
  • Harper: What do you think is wrong, fireman?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Miss Harper.
  • Fireman: Excuse me, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: He answered.
  • Fireman: But the fact is the medicine was wrong. We've had a poor lot lately, and today's it's worse. The other characters can manage. They had big fireboxes. Peter's is small and can't make the heat. With Welsh medicine, he'd be a different character.
  • Harper: It's expensive.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Harper: But Peter must have a fair chance. Al shall go and fetch them.
  • Ringo Starr: When the Welsh medicine came, Peter's Driver and Fireman were excited.
  • Fireman: Now we'll show 'em, Peter old fellow.
  • Ringo Starr: They carefully made his fire, putting large lumps of coal like a wall round the outside, then the glowing middle part was covered in smaller lumps.
  • Shaggy: You're spoiling my fire.
  • Ringo Starr: Complained Peter.
  • Fireman: Wait and see.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the fireman.
  • Fireman: We'll have a roaring fire just when we wanted.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman was right. When Peter reach the platform, the water was boiling nicely, and he had to let off steam.
  • Harper: How are you, Peter?
  • Peter: Peep, peep!
  • Ringo Starr: Whistled Peter.
  • Peter: I feel fine!
  • Harper: Have you a good fire, driver?
  • Driver: Never better, ma'am, and plenty of steam.
  • Harper: No record breaking.
  • Ringo Starr: Warned Miss Harper.
  • Harper: Don't push him too hard.
  • Driver: Peter won't need pushing, ma'am. I'll have to hold him back.
  • Ringo Starr: Peter had a lovely day. He had never felt so well of his life. He wanted to go fast, but his driver wouldn't let him.
  • Driver: Steady old fellow.
  • Ringo Starr: He would say.
  • Driver: There's plenty of time.
  • Ringo Starr: They arrived early at the station. Ash puffed in.
  • Peter: Where have you been, lazybones?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Peter.
  • Peter: Oh, I can't wait for dawdling trainers like you. Goodbye.
  • Ash: Whoosh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Ash to Lana and Lola.
  • Ash: Have you ever seen anything like it?
  • Ringo Starr: Both Lana and Lola agreed that they never had.

Nameplates after Peter's Special Medicine

  • Kevin
  • Sonic
  • Earthworm Jim
  • Peter
  • Ash
  • Al

The Flying Kipper

  • Ringo Starr: One winter evening, Peter's driver said...
  • Driver: We'll be out early tomorrow. We've got to take the Flying Kipper. Don't tell Scott, but I think if we pull the Kipper nicely, Miss Harper will let us pull the express. The special medicine they gave you is working well.
  • Peter: Hooray!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Peter.
  • Peter: That will be lovely.
  • Ringo Starr: All kinds of ships use the harbour at the big station by the sea. There are passenger ships, cargo ships and fishing boats also come here. They unload their fish on the key. Some of them goes the shops in the town, and the rest in a special train to other places far away. This is the train the railwaymen called the Flying Kipper. Peter was ready at 5:00. There was snow and frost. Men hustled and shouted loading up the crates of fish. The last door banged, the guard showed his green lamp, and the Flying Kipper was ready to go.
  • Peter: Come on, come on, don't be silly, don't be silly.
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Peter to the Beedrill. The Beedrill shuttered and groaned.
  • Beedrill: Trock-trock, trock-trick, all right, all right!
  • Peter: That is better, that is better.
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Peter. Clouds of smoke and steam poured from his funnel into the cold air, and the fire's light shown brightly.
  • Peter: Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: Panted Peter. They were going well. The light grew better, signal light shown green as they passed. Then, a yellow signal appeard ahead. His driver prepared to stop, but the home signal was down.
  • Driver: All clear, Peter. Away we go.
  • Ringo Starr: They couldn't know the switches from the main line to a siding were frozen, and a home signal should have been set a danger, but snow had forced it down. A freight train was waited in a siding to let the Flying Kipper past, and a Driver and Fireman were drinking cocoa in the caboose.
  • Conductor: The Kipper is due.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the conductor.
  • Fireman: Who cares?
  • Ringo Starr: Said the Fireman.
  • Fireman: This is good cocoa.
  • Ringo Starr: The driver got up.
  • Driver: Come on, fireman, back to our engine.
  • Ringo Starr: They got out just in time.
  • (Peter crashes into the break van and comes off the rails completely)
  • Ringo Starr: Peter's driver and fireman had jumped clear before the crash, but Peter lay dazed and surprised. Miss Harper came to see him.
  • Peter: The signal was down, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Peter.
  • Harper: Cheer up, Peter. It wasn't your fault. Ice and snow cause the accident. I'm sending you to Crewe, a fine place for sick characters. They'll give you your new shape and a larger firebox. You'll feel a different character, and won't need special medicine anymore. Won't that be nice?
  • Peter: Yes, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Peter doubtfully. Peter liked being a Crewe, but was glad to come home. A crowd of people waited to see him arrive in his new shape. He looked so splendid and strong that they gave him three cheers.
  • Peter: Peep, peep!
  • Ringo Starr: He whistled.
  • Peter: Thank you very much!
  • Ringo Starr: I'm sorry to say that a lot of little children were often late for school, because they waited to see Peter go by. They often see him pulling the express. He does it so well that Scott is jealous. But that's another story.

Nameplates after The Flying Kipper

  • Ash
  • Al
  • Peter
  • Sonic
  • Todd
  • Marty

Marty McFly

  • Ringo Starr: Marty McFly is a time traveler. He has brown hair and blue eyes and doesn't look like a normal character at all. He takes Beedrill from farms and villages to the main line and is cheerful to everyone he meets. He has a partner called Marcella who had seen better days.
  • Marcella: It's not fair at all.
  • Ringo Starr: She grumbles remembering she used to be full and nine Beedrill would rattle behind her. Now there were only 3 or four for the farms and factories send their goods mostly by truck. Marty is always careful. The cars, buses and trucks often had accidents. Marty hasn't had an accident for years. But the buses are crowded and Harriet is empty. A duelist and a stout teacher stood on Marty's platform. She was of course Miss Harper but Marty didn't noticed yet.
  • Dipper and Mabel: Come on, grandmother.
  • Ringo Starr: Cried the children.
  • Dipper and Pines: Do look at this character.
  • Harper: That's a time traveler, Dipper.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper.
  • Mabel: Is it a fraud?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Mabel.
  • Marty: Whoosh!
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Marty.
  • Dipper: Shh, shh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said her brother.
  • Dipper: You've offended him.
  • Mabel: But travelers are fraud, aren't they?
  • Harper: They are mostly, and this is a time traveler.
  • Dipper and Pines: May we go in it, grandmother, please?
  • Harper: Stop!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Miss Harper to the conductor. They all scrambled into Marcella.
  • Marcella: Hip-hip hooray!
  • Ringo Starr: Chanted Marcella. But Marty didn't sing.
  • Marty: Fraud indeed, Fraud indeed!
  • Ringo Starr: He snorted. He was proud of being a time traveler.
  • Harper: What is your name?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Miss Harper.
  • Marty: Marty, ma'am.
  • Harper: Thank you, Marty, for a very nice ride.
  • Marty: Thank you, ma'am.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Marty. He felt better now.
  • Marty: This teacher...
  • Ringo Starr: He thought.
  • Marty: ...is a teacher who knows how to speak to characters.
  • Ringo Starr: The children came every day for two weeks. Sometimes they rode with the conductor, sometimes in empty Beedrill. On the last day of all the driver invited them into his cab. All were sorry when they had to go away and Miss Harper and her family thanked everyone.
  • Marty: Come again soon.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Marty.
  • Dipper and Mabel: We will, we will.
  • Ringo Starr: Called the children. And they waved till Dan was out of sight. The months passed. Marty had few Beedrill and fewer passengers.
  • Driver: Our last day, Marty.
  • Ringo Starr: Said his driver one morning.
  • Driver: The manager says we must close tomorrow.
  • Ringo Starr: That day, everyone will have a chance of a last ride. The passengers joked and sang, but Marty and his driver wish they wouldn't.
  • Passengers: Goodbye, Marty.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the passengers afterwards.
  • Passengers: We are sorry your line was closing down.
  • Marty: So am I.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Marty.
  • Marty: Nobody wants me.
  • Ringo Starr: Marty thought and went unhappily to sleep. Next morning, the shed was flung open and old Marty woke with a start to his driver waving a piece of paper at him.
  • Driver: Wake up, Marty!
  • Ringo Starr: He shouted.
  • Driver: The mail has just arrived and there's a letter for us from the stout teacher! Maybe it's good news.

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