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Characters and Turntables & Other Stories is a Netflix Spoof to Tenders and Turntables & Other Stories. It is composed of six Season 1 episodes and one Season 2 episode narrated by Ringo Starr for the US.

Cast

  1. Ash Ketchum as Thomas (Veronica Taylor)
  2. Hiccup Horrendous Haddock as Edward (Jay Baruchel)
  3. Scott Summers as Henry (Kirby Morrow)
  4. Terry McGinnis as Gordon (Will Friedle)
  5. Al Valentine as James (Yuri Lowenthal)
  6. Rikochet as Percy (Carlos Alazraqui)
  7. Jackie Chan as Toby (James Sie)
  8. Jake "Razor" Clawson as Donald (Barry Gordon)
  9. Chance "T-Bone" Furlong as Douglas (Charlie Adler)
  10. Steven Ketchum as Sir Topham Hatt (Dan Green)
  11. Principal Raven Darkholme as The Stationmaster's Wife (Colleen Wheeler)
  12. Ralph as Stephen Hatt (Tara Jayne)
  13. Emily as Bridget Hatt (Amy Birnbaum)
  14. Princess Kitana as Henrietta (Cree Summer)
  15. Beedrill as Troublesome Trucks
  16. Arcanine as Coaches
  17. Bailey as Annie (Emily Niebo)
  18. Marina as Clarabel (Lisa Ortiz)
  19. Principal George Kelly as The Stationmaster of Ffarquhar (Dale Wilson)
  20. Wilhomena as Lady Hatt (Amy Birnbaum)
  21. Scooby-Doo as Bertie (Frank Welker)
  22. Lexi Bunny as Daisy (Jessica DiCicco)

Episodes

  1. Characters and Turntables
  2. Trouble In The Library
  3. Rikochet Runs Away
  4. Ash Comes To Breakfast
  5. Scott's Special Medicine
  6. The Flying Kipper
  7. Jackie Chan

Transcript

Characters and Turntables

  • Ringo Starr: Scott and Terry were lonely when Ash left the yard to run his route. They missed him very much. They had more work to do and had to fetch some more coaches. The big characters thought they were too important to fetch coaches. Al grumbled too.
  • Scott: We get no rest, we get no rest!
  • Ringo Starr: They all complained. But the coaches only laughed.
  • Coaches: You're lazy and slack, you're lazy and slack!
  • Ringo Starr: They answered. All together, the characters were causing Steven a great deal of trouble. The big stations both ends on the line each have a turntable. Steven had made them so that the tender characters can be turned round because it is dangerous for them to go fast and backwards. Characters like Ash don't need turntables. They can go just as well backwards as forwards. But to hear Terry talk, he would've thought that Steven had given him a tender just to show how important he was.
  • Terry: You don't understand, little Ash. We Big Characters have a position to keep up. It doesn't matter where you go, but we are important, and for Steven to make us shunt Beedrill, fetch coaches and go on some of those dirty sidings it's, it's, well, it's not the proper thing.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash chuckled and went off with Bailey and Marina.
  • Terry: Disgraceful!
  • Ringo Starr: Terry hissed as he ran backwards to the turntable. The turntable was in the windy place close to the sea, and he was not on it just right, he put amount of balance and made a difficult to turn. Today, Terry was in the bad temper, and the wind was blowing fiercly. His driver tried to make him stop in the right place but Terry wasn't trying. The fireman tried to turn the handle, but Terry's weight and the strong wind prevented him.
  • Driver: It's no good.
  • Ringo Starr: They said at last.
  • Driver: Your tender upsets the balance. If you're a little character, you be all right. Now you have to pull the next train backwards.
  • Boys: Look!
  • Ringo Starr: Called some boys.
  • Boys: There's a new character! Oh, it's only Terry, back to front.
  • Ash: Hello!
  • Ringo Starr: Called Ash.
  • Ash: Playing little characters? Sensible character. Take my advice, scrap your tender and have a nice bunker.
  • Ringo Starr: Terry said nothing. Even Al laughed when he saw him.
  • Terry: Take care.
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Terry.
  • Terry: You might stick too.
  • Al: No fear.
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Al.
  • Al: I'm not so fat as you. I mustn't stick.
  • Ringo Starr: Thought Al. He stopped on just the right place to balance the table. It could now swing easily. Terry arrived and time to see everything. Al turned much too easily. The wind puffed him round like a top. He couldn't stop!
  • (Al spins faster and faster until he slows down, and as the turntable stops, he is all green and dizzy)
  • Terry: Well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry.
  • Terry: Are you playing roundabouts?
  • Ringo Starr: Poor Al feeling quite giddy rolled off to the shed without a word. That night, the three characters had an indignation meeting.
  • Terry: It's shameful to treat tender characters like this. Terry has to go backwards and people think he's a tank character, Al spins like a top and everyone laughs at us. And added to that, Bugs Bunny makes us all shunt in dirty sidings. Blech! Listen.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry. He whispered something to the others.
  • Terry: We'll do it tomorrow. Steven will look silly.
  • Ringo Starr: The characters had decided to go on strike.

Trouble In The Library

  • Ringo Starr: Steven sat in his laboratory listening to the noise outside. The passengers were angry. The stationmaster came in.
  • Stationmaster: There's trouble in the library, sir. Scott was sulking. There's no train and the passengers are saying this is a bad railway.
  • Steven: Indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: We cannot allow that.
  • Ringo Starr: He found Terry, Al and Scott looking very cross.
  • Steven: Come along, Scott. It's time your train was ready.
  • Terry: Scott's not going!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Terry.
  • Terry: We won't shunt like little characters. That was Ash's job. We are important tender characters. You fetch our coaches and we will pull them. Tender characters don't shunt.
  • Steven: We'll see about that.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: No character on my railway is too important for small jobs.
  • Ringo Starr: And he hurried away to find Hiccup.
  • Steven: The yard has never been the same since Ash left to run his branch line.
  • Ringo Starr: He thought sadly. Hiccup was shunting.
  • Steven: Leave those Beedrill please, Hiccup.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: I want to push coaches for me in the yard.
  • Hiccup: Thank you, sir. That will be a nice change.
  • Steven: That's a good boy. Off you go then.
  • Ringo Starr: So Hiccup found coaches for the three characters and that day, the train's ran as usual. But next morning, Hiccup looked unhappy. Terry came clanking pass hissing rudely.
  • Steven: Bless me!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: What a noise!
  • Hiccup: They all hissed me, Sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Hiccup.
  • Hiccup: They say tender characters don't shunt and last night they said I have gray feet. I haven't have I, sir?
  • Steven: No Hiccup, you have nice blue ones, and I'm proud of you. Tender characters do shunt, but all the same we do need another character here.
  • Ringo Starr: He went to the workshop and they showed them all sorts of characters. At last, he saw a smart little wrestler.
  • Steven: That's the one.
  • Ringo Starr: He thought.
  • Steven: If I choose you, will you work hard?
  • Rikochet: Oh sir, yes sir.
  • Steven: That's a good boy. I'll call you Rikochet.
  • Rikochet: Yes sir, thank you sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Rikochet. And Steven brought him back to the yard.
  • Steven: Hiccup.
  • Ringo Starr: He called.
  • Steven: Here's Rikochet. Will you show him everything?
  • Ringo Starr: Rikochet soon learned what he had to do and they had a happy afternoon. Then Scott came by hissing as usual.
  • Rikochet: Wheesh!
  • Ringo Starr: Went Rikochet. Scott jumped and ran back to the shed.
  • Scott: How beautifully you wheeshed him!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed Scott.
  • Scott: I can't wheesh like that.
  • Rikochet: Oh.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Rikochet.
  • Rikochet: That's nothing. You should hear them in the workshop. You have to wheesh loudly to make yourself heard.
  • Ringo Starr: Next morning, Ash arrived.
  • Ash: Steven sent to me. I expect he wants help.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to Hiccup.
  • Hiccup: Sh, sh, here he comes.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Hiccup.
  • Steven: Well done, Ash, you've been quick. Listen, Scott, Terry and Al are sulking they say they won't shunt like little characters, so I have shut them up and I want you both to run a line for a while.
  • Ash: Little characters indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Ash.
  • Ash: We'll show them.
  • Steven: And Rikochet will help too.
  • Rikochet: Oh sir, yes sir, please sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Answered Rikochet. Hiccup and Ash worked the main line greeting each other as they pass by. Rikochet puffed along the branch line. Ash was anxious about Bailey and Marina, but both driver and conductor promise to take care of them. They were fewer trains but the passengers didn't mind. They knew the three other characters were having a lesson. Terry, Al and Scott were cold, lonely and miserable. They wish now they haven't been so silly.

Rikochet Runs Away

  • Ringo Starr: Scott, Al and Terry were miserable. They had been shut up for several days for being naughty and longed to be let out again. At last, Steven arrived.
  • Steven: I hope you are sorry.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Steven: And that you understand that every job on the railway is important. We have a new character named Rikochet who helps pull coaches and Ash and Hiccup had worked the main line nicely, but I will let you now if you promise to work hard.
  • Terry: Yes sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the three characters.
  • Al: We will.
  • Steven: That's right, but please remember that this no shunting nonsense must stop.
  • Ringo Starr: He then told Rikochet, Hiccup and Ash that they can go and play on a branch line for a few days, and they ran off happily to find Bailey and Marina at the junction. The two ladies were very pleased to see Ash again. Hiccup and Rikochet played with the Beedrill.
  • Beedrill: Stop, stop, stop!
  • Ringo Starr: Screamed the Beedrill as they pushed them to their proper sidings. But the two boys laughed and went on shunting till the Beedrill were tightling arranged. Next, Hiccup took some empty Beedrill from the quarry. Rikochet was left alone. He didn't mind that a bit. He like watching trains and being cheeky to the other characters.
  • Rikochet: Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: He would call, and they got very cross. After a great deal of shunting, Rikochet was waiting for the signalman to set the switch so that he can go back to the yard. He was eager to work, but was being rather careless and not paying attention. Hiccup had warned Rikochet.
  • Hiccup: Be careful on the main line. Whistle to the signalman that you are there.
  • Ringo Starr: But Rikochet didn't remember to whistle, and so the busy signalman forgot him. Rikochet waited and waited. The switch were still against him so he couldn't move. Then, he looked along the main line.
  • Rikochet: Peep, peep!
  • Ringo Starr: He whistled in horror, for rushing straight towards him was Terry with the express.
  • Terry: Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Groaned Terry.
  • Terry: Get out of my way!
  • (Terry approaches Rikochet, who then shuts his eyes and the big character comes to a frightening halt)
  • Ringo Starr: Rikochet opened his eyes. Terry had stopped with Alex's buffers a few inches from his own. But Alex had began to move.
  • Rikochet: I won't stay here, I'll run away!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed. He ran straight through Hiccup's station, and was so frighetend that he ran right up Terry's hill without stopping. After that, he was tired, but he couldn't stop. He had no driver to shut off steam and applied his brakes.
  • Rikochet: I want to stop! I want to stop!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed. The man in the signalbox saw Rikochet was in trouble, so he kindly set the switch. Rikochet puffed wearly onto a nice empty siding, ending in a big bank of earth. He was too tired now to care where he went.
  • Rikochet: I want to stop, I want to stop! I have stopped!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed thankfully.
  • Workmen: Never mind, Rikochet.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the workmen as they dug him out.
  • Workmen: You shall have some drink and some coal and then you feel better.
  • Ringo Starr: Presently, Terry arrived.
  • Terry: Well done, Rikochet. You started so quickly that you stopped the nasty accident.
  • Rikochet: I'm sorry I was cheeky.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Rikochet.
  • Rikochet: You were clever to stop.
  • Ringo Starr: Then Terry helped pull Rikochet out from the bank. The two characters are now good friends, but Rikochet was always most careful that he goes out on the main line.

Ash Comes To Breakfast

  • Ringo Starr: Ash Ketchum has worked his route for many years, and knows it very well.
  • Ash's Driver: You know just where to stop, Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed his driver.
  • Ash's Driver: You could almost manage it without me.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash had become conceited. He didn't realize his driver was joking. Later, he boasted to the others.
  • Ash: Driver says I don't need him now.
  • ​Ringo Starr: He told the others.
  • Rikochet: Don't be so daft!
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Rikochet.
  • Jackie: I'd never go without my driver.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jackie, earnestly.
  • Jackie: I'd be frightened.
  • Ash: Puh!
  • Ringo Starr: Boasted Ash.
  • Ash: I'm not scared!
  • Jackie: You'd never dare!
  • Ash: I would then, you'll see.
  • Ringo Starr: Next morning, the firelighter came. Ash drowsed comfortably, and the warmth spread through his body. Rikochet and Jackie were still asleep. Ash suddenly remembered.
  • Ash: Silly stick-in-the-muds!
  • Ringo Starr: He chuckled.
  • Ash: I'll show them. Driver said I could manage without him. I'll just go out, then I'll stop and WHEESH! That'll make them jump.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash thought he was being clever. Really, he was only moving because a careless cleaner had meddled with his body. He soon found his mistake. He tried to wheesh, but he couldn't. He tried to stop, but he couldn't. He just kept rolling along. He didn't dare look at what was coming next; there was the principal's house. The principal was just about to have breakfast.
  • Ash: Horrors!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Ash, and shut his eyes. (CRASH!) The house rocked, broken glass tinkled, plaster was everywhere. Ash had collected a bush on his travels. He peered into the room through its leaves. He couldn't speak. The principal was furious. His wife picked up her plate.
  • Darkholme: You miserable trainer!
  • Ringo Starr: She scolded.
  • Darkholme: Just look what you've done to our breakfast! Now I shall have to cook some more!
  • Ringo Starr: She banged the door. More plaster fell. This time, it fell on Ash. Ash felt depressed. Workmen propped up the house with strong poles, and laid a path through the garden. Meanwhile, Razor and T-Bone arrived.
  • T-Bone: Dinna fash yourself, Ash, we'll soon have you back on the path!
  • Ringo Starr: They laughed. Razor and T-Bone, working hard, managed to haul Ash back to safety. Bits of fencing, a bush, and a broken window frame festuned his front, which was badly twisted. The cells laughed and left him. Ash was in disgrace. There was worse to come.
  • Steven: You in a lot of trouble, Ash.
  • Ash: I know, sir. I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash's voice was muffled behind his bush.
  • Steven: You must go to the workshop and have your front mended, it will be a long job.
  • Ash: Yes, sir.
  • Steven: Meanwhile, a bunny will do your work.
  • Ash: A b-b-b-bunny, sir?
  • Ringo Starr: Ash spluttered.
  • Steven: Yes, Ash. Bunnies always stay in their houses until they are wanted. Bunnies never galavant off to breakfast in principal's houses.

Scott's Special Medicine

  • Ringo Starr: One morning, Scott was feeling very sorry for himself. Sometimes he can pull trains, but sometimes he felt he had no strength at all.
  • Scott: I suffer dreadfully and no one cares.
  • Al: Rubbish, Scott!
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Al.
  • Al: You don't work hard enough!
  • Ringo Starr: Steven spoke to him too.
  • Steven: What's wrong with you, Scott? You have lots of new parts and new paint too, but they've done you no good. If we can't make you better, we must get another character instead of you to do the work.
  • Ringo Starr: This made Scott, his driver and fireman very sad. Steven was waiting when Scott came to the platform. He had taken off his hat and coat and put on overalls. Scott managed to start but his fireman was not satisfied.
  • Fireman: Scott is a bad steamer.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to Steven.
  • Fireman: I built up his fire, but it doesn't give enough heat.
  • Ringo Starr: Scott tried very hard, but it was no good. He didn't have enough steam, and came to a stop outside Hiccup's station.
  • Scott: Oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: Thought Scott.
  • Scott: I shall have to go away! Oh dear, oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: All he could do is to go slowly onto a siding, and Kevin took charge of the train. Steven and the Fireman went on discussing Scott's troubles.
  • Steven: What do you think is wrong, fireman?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Steven.
  • Fireman: Excuse me, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: He answered.
  • Fireman: But the fact is the medicine was wrong. We've had a poor lot lately, and today's it's worse. The other characters can manage. They had big fireboxes. Scott's is small and can't make the heat. With Welsh medicine, he'd be a different character.
  • Steven: It's expensive.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Steven.
  • Steven: But Scott must have a fair chance. Al shall go and fetch them.
  • Ringo Starr: When the Welsh medicine came, Scott's Driver and Fireman were excited.
  • Fireman: Now we'll show 'em, Scott old fellow.
  • Ringo Starr: They carefully made his fire, putting large lumps of coal like a wall round the outside, then the glowing middle part was covered in smaller lumps.
  • Scott: You're spoiling my fire.
  • Ringo Starr: Complained Scott.
  • Fireman: Wait and see.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the fireman.
  • Fireman: We'll have a roaring fire just when we wanted.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman was right. When Scott reach the platform, the water was boiling nicely, and he had to let off steam.
  • Steven: How are you, Scott?
  • Scott: Peep, peep!
  • Ringo Starr: Whistled Scott.
  • Scott: I feel fine!
  • Steven: Have you a good fire, driver?
  • Driver: Never better, sir, and plenty of steam.
  • Steven: No record breaking.
  • Ringo Starr: Warned Steven.
  • Steven: Don't push him too hard.
  • Driver: Scott won't need pushing, sir. I'll have to hold him back.
  • Ringo Starr: Scott had a lovely day. He had never felt so well of his life. He wanted to go fast, but his driver wouldn't let him.
  • Driver: Steady old fellow.
  • Ringo Starr: He would say.
  • Driver: There's plenty of time.
  • Ringo Starr: They arrived early at the station. Ash puffed in.
  • Scott: Where have you been, lazybones?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Scott.
  • Scott: Oh, I can't wait for dawdling trainers like you. Goodbye.
  • Ash: Whoosh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Ash to Bailey and Marina.
  • Ash: Have you ever seen anything like it?
  • Ringo Starr: Both Bailey and Marina agreed that they never had.

The Flying Kipper

Jackie Chan

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