Cranky and the Queen of Ponyville is the seventh episode of the seventh season of Spike the Dragon and Friends, and the one hundred and sixty-third episode overall. It is a parody of the Thomas and Friends episode, James and the Queen of Sodor.


  • Spike as Thomas
  • Big Macintosh as Gordon
  • Cranky Doodle Donkey as James
  • Pipsqueak as Percy
  • Soarin as Duck
  • Hoity Toity as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Filthy Rich as Henry (cameo)
  • Dr. Hooves as Oliver (cameo)
  • Twilight Sparkle as Mavis (cameo)
  • Diamond Tiara as Arry (cameo) (I know, Diamond Tiara is female)
  • Silver Spoon as Bert (cameo) (I know, Silver Spoon is female)
  • Cheese Sandwich as Salty (cameo)
  • Woody (from Toy Story) as Skarloey (cameo)
  • Apple Bloom as Annie (cameo)
  • Sweetie Belle as Clarabel (cameo)
  • Tank as Toad (cameo)
  • Royal Riff as Butch (cameo)
  • Everyone else as Themselves


Narrator: "The animals in Ponyville want to be responsible, reliable and really useful. They are happiest when Hoity Toity gives important work to do.

Cranky thinks his work is very important indeed. He is proud of his shiny brown fur and likes to look clean and smart.

One day, Pipsqueak puffed to the washdown."

Pipsqueak: "My whistle's clogged."

Narrator: "He tried to blow hard to clean it out, but instead blew mud all over Big Macintosh."

Big Macintosh: "Silly!"

Narrator: "Huffed Big Mac. Pipsqueak was trying not to laugh."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Keep your dirt away for me! I'm collecting the mayor today."

Big Macintosh: "I should do that."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Really?"

Narrator: "Chuckled Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "You'd need a washdown first."

Big Macintosh: "Pah!"

Narrator: "Snorted Big Mac. Cranky just laughed.

Soon, Cranky had collected the mayor, and puffed proudly away."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Just look at me, Big Macintosh!"

Big Macintosh: "Show off!"

Narrator: "Muttered Big Mac.

Hoity Toity came to the sheds."

Hoity Toity: "I need an animal to collect the Queen of Ponyville."

Spike: "Who's the Queen of Ponyville?"

Hoity Toity: "A leaky old barge."

Narrator: "Replied Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "She needs to go to the workshops. It's dirty work I'm afraid."

Narrator: "Just then, James arrived at the library. This gave Big Mac an idea."

Big Macintosh: "Is collecting the Queen of Ponyville important work too?"

Hoity Toity: "Very important work. Do I have a volunteer?"

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Very important work?"

Narrator: "Exclaimed Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I'll do it!"

Hoity Toity: "Then it settled. She's waiting at the canal."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Thank you, sir."

Narrator: "Said Cranky. Big Mac was delighted his plan was working."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I'm here to collect the Queen of Ponyville!"

Narrator: "Announced Cranky."

Yard Manager: "There she is."

Narrator: "The yard manager said. Cranky was furious."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: That slimy old tub?! Big Mac tricked me! He wants me to get dirty. I'll show him. A shiny donkey like me never gets dirty."

Narrator: "Soon Cranky set off with the Queen of Ponyville.

It was a long journey to the workshops."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Shiny and clean, shiny and clean."

Narrator: "Puffed Cranky.

Then, there was trouble. The tall funnel of the old barge crashed through a pipe. Cranky was sure he'd get covered in sludge. But he didn't."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Shiny and clean, shiny and clean!"

Narrator: "He declared again.

The workmen soon cleared the mess, and then Cranky was on his way.

He arrived safe and sound, and pleased that the dirty work was done.

When Cranky returned to the library, he was very proud of himself."

Big Macintosh: "How did you manage to stay so clean?"

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I have to stay clean."

Narrator: "Boasted Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "In case there's important work to do."

Narrator: "Just then, Pipsqueak returned from the quarry."

Pipsqueak: "My whistle is clogged again. Watch out, Cranky!"

Narrator: "Dust went everywhere."

Pipsqueak: "I did warn you."

Spike: "You'll need a washdown now."

Narrator: "Teased Spike."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Good."

Narrator: "Snorted Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "It will make me browner than ever. I'm such a splendid donkey."

Big Macintosh, Soarin, Spike and Pipsqueak: (Groan)

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