Dipper and Launchpad and Other Stories is a Jake and Friends spoof to the UK Thomas Video entitled: Percy and Harold and Other Stories. It has eight Season 2 episodes narrated by Ringo Starr for the UK.


  1. Jake Long as Thomas (Dante Basco)
  2. Kuzco as Edward (J. P. Manoux)
  3. Randy Cunningham as Henry (Ben Schwartz)
  4. Mike Chilton as Gordon (Reid Scott)
  5. Brad Buttowski as James (Danny Cooksey)
  6. Dipper Pines as Percy (Jason Ritter)
  7. Woody as Duck (Tom Hanks)
  8. Timon as Donald (Quinton Flynn)
  9. Pumbaa as Douglas (Ernie Sabella)
  10. Evil Emperor Zurg as Diesel (Wayne Knight)
  11. Chip as Bill (Tress MacNeille)
  12. Dale as Ben (Corey Burton)
  13. Janna Sullivan as Annie (Grey DeLisle)
  14. Hope Roberts as Clarabel (Grey DeLisle)
  15. Gopher as Terence (Michael Gough)
  16. Lightning McQueen as Bertie (Owen Wilson)
  17. Launchpad McQuack as Harold (Terry McGovern)
  18. Captain Hook as The Spiteful Break Van (Jack Wagner)
  19. Pirates as Troublesome Trucks
  20. Mickey Mouse as Sir Topham Hatt (Wayne Allwine)
  21. Captain Greer as The Inspector (Arthur Gould-Porter)
  22. George Darling as The Barber (Hans Conried)
  23. Penn Zero as Toby (Thomas Middleditch)
  24. Phineas Flynn as Trevor (Vincent Martella)
  25. Mary Poppins as Mrs. Kyndley (Julie Andrews)
  26. Widow Tweed as The Storyteller (Russi Taylor)


  1. Dipper and Launchpad
  2. The Runaway
  3. Dipper Takes The Plunge
  4. Pop Goes The Emperor
  5. Dirty Work
  6. A Close Shave
  7. Better Late Than Never
  8. Captain Hook


Dipper and Launchpad

  • Ringo Starr: Dipper worked hard at the new port. The workmen needed stone for their building. Penn helped, but sometimes the loads of stone were too heavy, and Dipper had to fetch them for himself. Sometimes, he'd see Jake.
  • Jake: Well done, Dipper. Mickey Mouse is very pleased with us.
  • Ringo Starr: An airfield was closed by. Dipper heard the airplane zooming overhead all day. The noises of all was a duck.
  • Dipper: Stupid thing!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper.
  • Dipper: Why can't and go and buzz somewhere else?
  • Ringo Starr: One day, Dipper stopped at the airfield.
  • Dipper: Hello.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper.
  • Dipper: Who are you?
  • Launchpad: I'm Launchpad.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the duck.
  • Launchpad: Who are you?
  • Dipper: I'm Dipper. What whirly great arms you've got.
  • Launchpad: They're nice arms.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Launchpad.
  • Launchpad: I can hover like a bird. Don't you wish you could hover?
  • Dipper: Certainly not. I like my rails, thank you.
  • Launchpad: I think railways are slow.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Launchpad.
  • Launchpad: They're not much use and quite out of date.
  • Ringo Starr: He whirled his arms and buzzed away. Dipper found Penn at the quarry.
  • Dipper: I say Penn. That Launchpad, that stuck up whirlybird thing, says I'm slow and out of date. Just let him wait. I'll show him.
  • Ringo Starr: He collected his pirates and started off still fuming. Soon, they heard a familar buzzing.
  • Driver: Dipper.
  • Ringo Starr: Whispered his driver.
  • Driver: There's Launchpad. He's not far ahead. Let's race him.
  • Dipper: Yes, let's.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper. Dipper pounded along, the pirates screamed and swayed.
  • Driver: Well, I'll be a ding-dong dang!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the driver. There was Launchpad. The race was on!
  • Driver: Go it, Dipper!
  • Ringo Starr: He yelled.
  • Driver: You're ganging!
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper had never been allowed to go fast before. He was having the time of his life.
  • Dipper: Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: He panted to the pirates.
  • Pirates: We don't want to, we don't want to.
  • Ringo Starr: They grumbled. It was no use. Dipper was bucketing along with flying wheels and Launchpad was high and alongside. The fireman shoveled for dear life.
  • Driver: Well done, Dipper!
  • Ringo Starr: Shouted the driver.
  • Driver: We're ganging! We're going ahead! Oh good boy, good boy!
  • Ringo Starr: A distant signal warned them that the harbour wharf was near.
  • Dipper: Peep peep peep! Brakes, guard, please?
  • Ringo Starr: The driver carefully checked the train's headlong speed. They rolled onto the main line, and haulted on the wharf.
  • Dipper: Oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: Groaned Dipper.
  • Dipper: I'm sure we've lost.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman scrambled to the cab roof.
  • Fireman: We've won, we've won!
  • Ringo Starr: He shouted.
  • Fireman: Launchpad's still hovering. He's looking for a place to land. Listen, boys.
  • Ringo Starr: The fireman called.
  • Fireman: Here's a song for Dipper. (singing) Said Launchpad McQuack to our Dipper you are slow. Your railway is out of date and not much used you know, but Dipper and his stone pirates did the trip in record time, and we beat the duck on our old branch line.
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper loved it.
  • Dipper: Oh, thank you!
  • Ringo Starr: He said. He liked the last line best of all, and was a very happy boy.

The Runaway

  • Ringo Starr: Jake Long was ill. Workmen had tried to make him better, but it was no use.
  • Mickey Mouse: Kuzco must take you to the works.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mickey Mouse. Jake felt very miserable. Then, Mickey spoke to Woody.
  • Mickey Mouse: I want you to help Dipper and Penn while Jake is away.
  • Ringo Starr: Woody was delighted. He already knew Dipper and soon made friends with Penn and Lightning McQueen. Gopher gave him a big welcome too.
  • Gopher: Take care of Jake's coaches.
  • Ringo Starr: He advised.
  • Gopher: He's sure to miss them while he's away. Woody was very gentle with the coaches. Janna and Hope were impressed.
  • Janna and Hope: Such nice manners.
  • Ringo Starr: They told each other.
  • Janna and Hope: It really is a pleasure to go out with him.
  • Ringo Starr: When Jake came back, Janna and Hope told him how well Woody had managed. Jake was so pleased to be home that he soon forgot to be jealous. The works have left Jake's handbrake very stiff. It made his brakes seen they were on, when in fact they were not. As a result, he and his coaches often overran the platform. Jake found this most embarrasing. Gradually, his driver and fireman learned to be extra careful. But one day, Jake's fireman was ill and a relief man took his place. The fireman had fastened the coupling and joined the driver and stationmaster on the platform to wait for Randy's passengers. The fireman had forgot all about Jake's handbrake. Jake simmered happily.
  • Jake: Not long now.
  • Ringo Starr: He thought. As he saw Randy slowly approaching. But Jake's brakes were not on and suddenly he felt his feet begin to move. He tried to stop, but he couldn't without his driver and fireman. He tried to whistle a warning, but he couldn't do that either. The Conductor, driver fireman and passengers were all stranded on the platform.
  • Janna and Hope: Stop! Stop!
  • Ringo Starr: Shrieked Janna and Hope. But Jake, with plenty of steam, kept on going. The alarm went down the line.
  • Signalman: Stop the runaway!
  • Ringo Starr: There ready for action was Launchpad McQuack. The inspector had made a plan and together they took off into the sky. At last Jake was tiring.
  • Jake: I need to stop, I need to stop.
  • Ringo Starr: He panted weirdly. As they neared the next station Jake saw Launchpad land. They entered the platform slowly enough for the inspector to act. Judging his moments the inspector scrambled into the cab and screwed the brakes on.
  • (The inspector brakes with all his strength)
  • Ringo Starr: At last Jake stopped. Both he and the inspector were very relieved. Then they thanked Launchpad.
  • Launchpad: Think nothing of it.
  • Ringo: Starr: Whirled Launchpad.
  • Launchpad: Glad to be at service anytime.
  • Inspector: Phew.
  • Ringo Starr: Remarked The inspector.
  • Inspector: You must never let this happen again, Jake.
  • Ringo Starr: Weirdly, Jake agreed with him.

Dipper Takes The Plunge

  • Ringo Starr: One day, Randy wanted to rest, but Dipper was talking to some characters. He was telling them about the time he had braved bad weather to help Jake.
  • Dipper: It was raining hard. Water swirled under my boiler. I couldn't see where I was going, but I struggled on.
  • Chip: Oh, Dipper, you are brave.
  • Dipper: Well, it wasn't anything really. Water's nothing to a character with determination.
  • Dale: Tell us more, Dipper.
  • Randy: What are you characters doing here?
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Randy.
  • Randy: This shed is for Mickey Mouse's characters. Go away. Silly things.
  • Ringo Starr: Randy snorted.
  • Dipper: They're not silly.
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper had been enjoying himself.
  • Randy: They are silly and so are you. Water's nothing to a character with determination. Huh.
  • Dipper: Anyway.
  • Ringo Starr: Said cheeky Dipper.
  • Dipper: I'm not afraid of water, I like it.
  • Ringo Starr: He ran off to the harbour singing.
  • Dipper: Once a character attached to a train, was afraid of a few drops of rain.
  • Randy: No one ever lets me forget the time i wouldn't come out of the tunnel in case the rain spoiled my paint.
  • Ringo Starr: Huffed Randy. Jake was looking at the board on the key.
  • Jake: Danger. We mustn't go passed it.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Jake: That's orders.
  • Dipper: Why?
  • Jake: Danger means falling down something.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Jake.
  • Jake: I went pass danger once, and fell down a mine.
  • Dipper: I can't see a mine.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper. He didn't know that the foundations of the key had sunk. The rails now sloped down into the sea.
  • Dipper: Stupid board.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper. Dipper made a plan. One day, he whispered to the pirates.
  • Dipper: Will you give me a bump when we get to the key?
  • Ringo Starr: The pirates had never asked to bump an engine before. They giggled and chattered about it.
  • Dipper: Driver doesn't know my plan.
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Dipper.
  • Pirates: On, on, on!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed the pirates. Dipper thought they were helping.
  • Dipper: I'll pretend to stop at the station, but the pirates will push me pass the board. Then I'll make them stop. I can do that wherever I like.
  • Ringo Starr: Every wise character knows that you cannot trust pirates.
  • Pirates: Go on, go on!
  • Ringo Starr: They yelled, and bumped Dipper's driver and fireman off the footplate.
  • Dipper: Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Dipper, sliding pass the board. Dipper was frantic.
  • Dipper: That's enough!
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper was sunked.
  • Mickey: You are a very disobeident character.
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper knew that voice.
  • Dipper: Please, sir, get me out, sir, I'm truly sorry, sir.
  • Mickey: No, Dipper, we cannot do that till high tide. I hope it will teach you to obey orders.
  • Dipper: Yes, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: It was dark when they brought floating cranes to rescue Dipper. He was too cold and stiff to move by himself. Next day, he was sent to the works on Randy's goods train.
  • Randy: Well, well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Randy.
  • Randy: Did you like the water?
  • Dipper: No.
  • Randy: I am surprised. You need more determination, Dipper. Water's nothing to a character with determination you know. Perhaps you will like it better next time.
  • Ringo Starr: Dipper is quite determined that there won't be a next time.

Pop Goes The Emperor

  • Ringo Starr: Woody is proud of being a cowboy. He talks endlessly about it. But he works hard too and makes everything ran like clockwork. It was a splendid day. The pirates and flowers behave well, the passengers even stopped grumbling. But the characters didn't like having to bustle about.
  • Woody: There are two ways of doing things.
  • Ringo Starr: Woody told them.
  • Woody: The cowboy way, or the wrong way. I'm a cowboy and...
  • Randy, Mike and Brad: Don't we know it!
  • Ringo Starr: They groaned. The characters were glad when the visitor came. He purred smoothly towards him. Mickey introduce him.
  • Mickey: Here is Zurg. I have agreed to give him a trial. He needs to learn. Please teach him, Woody.
  • Zurg: Good morning.
  • Ringo Starr: Purred Zurg in an oily voice.
  • Zurg: Please to meet you, Woody. Is that Brad and Randy and Mike too? I am delighted to meet such famous characters.
  • Ringo Starr: The silly characters were flattered.
  • Characters: He has very good manners.
  • Ringo Starr: They murmured.
  • Characters: We are pleased to have in our yard.
  • Ringo Starr: Woody had his doubts.
  • Woody: Come on!
  • Ringo Starr: He said. Zurg purred after him.
  • Zurg: Your worthy Mic...
  • Woody: Mickey Mouse to you.
  • Ringo Starr: Ordered Woody. Zurg looked hurt.
  • Zurg: Your worthy Mickey Mouse thinks I need to learn. He is mistaken. We robots don't need to learn. We know everything. We come to a yard and improvement. We are revolutionary.
  • Woody: Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Woody.
  • Woody: If you are revo-thingummy, perhaps you would collect my pirates while I fetch Mike's flowers.
  • Ringo Starr: Zurg delighted to show off, purred away. When Woody returned, Zurg was trying to take some pirates from a siding. They were old and empty. They've not been touch for a long time. Zurg found them hard to move. Pull! Push! Backwards! Forwards!
  • Pirates: Oh! Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: The pirates groaned.
  • Pirates: We can't! We won't!
  • Ringo Starr: Woody watched with interest. Zurg lost patience.
  • Zurg: Grrr!
  • Ringo Starr: He roared, and gave a great heave. The pirates jerked forward.
  • Pirates: Oh! Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: They screamed.
  • Pirates: We can't! We won't!
  • Ringo Starr: Some of their brakes snapped, and the gear jammed in the sleepers.
  • Zurg: Grrrr!
  • Woody: Ha, ha, ha!
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Woody. Zurg recovered and try to push the pirates back, but they wouldn't move. Woody ran quietly around to collect the other pirates.
  • Woody: Thank you for arranging these, Zurg. I must go now.
  • Zurg: Don't you want this lot?
  • Woody: No thank you.
  • Ringo Starr: Zurg gulped.
  • Zurg: And I've taken all this trouble? Why didn't you tell me?
  • Woody: You never asked me. Besides.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Woody.
  • Woody: You were having such fun being revo-whatever-it-was-you-said. Goodbye.
  • Zurg: Grrrr!
  • Ringo Starr: Zurg had to help the workmen clear the mess. He hated it. All the pirates were laughing and singing at him.
  • Pirates: Pirates are waiting in the yard, tackling them with ease'll, show the world what I can do, gaily boasts Zurg, in and out he creeps about, like a big black weasel, when he pulls the wrong pirates out, Pop Goes the Emperor!
  • Zurg: Grrr!
  • Ringo Starr: Growled Zurg, and scuttled away to sulk in the shed.

Dirty Work

  • Ringo Starr: Zurg, the Evil Emperor, was sulking. The pirates would not stop singing rudely at him. Woody was horrified.
  • Woody: Shut up!
  • Ringo Starr: He ordered, and bumped them hard.
  • Woody: I'm sorry our pirates were rude to you, Zurg.
  • Ringo Starr: Zurg was still furious.
  • Zurg: It's all your fault. You made them laugh at me.
  • Randy: Nonsense.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Randy.
  • Randy: Woody would never do that. We characters have our differences, but we never talked about them to the pirates. That would be dis...dis...
  • Mike: Disgraceful.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mike.
  • Brad: Disgusting.
  • Ringo Starr: Put in Brad.
  • Randy: Despicable.
  • Ringo Starr: Finished Randy. Zurg hated Woody. He wanted him to be sent away, so he made a plan. He was going to tell lies about Woody. Next day, he spoke to the pirates.
  • Zurg: I see you like jokes. You made a good joke about me yesterday. I laughed and laughed. Woody told me one about Mike. I'll whisper it. Don't tell Mike I told you.
  • Ringo Starr: And he sniggered away.
  • Pirates: Ha, ha, ha!
  • Ringo Starr: Guffawed the pirates.
  • Pirates: Mike will be cross with Woody when he knows. Let's tell him and get back at Woody for bumping us.
  • Ringo Starr: They laughed rudely at the characters as they went by. Soon Mike, Randy and Brad found out why.
  • Mike: Disgraceful.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mike.
  • Brad: Disgusting.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Brad.
  • Randy: Despicable.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Randy.
  • Randy: We cannot allow it.
  • Ringo Starr: They consulted together.
  • Rany: Yes.
  • Ringo Starr: They said.
  • Randy: He did it to us, we'll do it to him and see how he likes it.
  • Ringo Starr: Woody was tired out. The pirates had been cheeky and troublesome. He wanted a rest in the shed. The three characters barred his way.
  • Mike, Brad and Randy: Hooosh!
  • Brad: Keep out!
  • Woody: Stop fooling.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Woody.
  • Woody: I'm tired.
  • Mike: So are we.
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed the engines.
  • Mike: We're tired of you.
  • Randy: We like Zurg. We don't like you.
  • Brad: You tell tales about us to the pirates.
  • Woody: I don't!
  • Mike, Brad and Randy: You do!
  • Woody: I don't!
  • Mike, Brad and Randy: You do!
  • Ringo Starr: Mickey Mouse came to stop the noise.
  • Mike: Woody called me a galloping sausage!
  • Ringo Starr: Spluttered Mike.
  • Brad: Rusty red scrap-irons!
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Brad.
  • Randy: I'm old square wheels!
  • Ringo Starr: Fumed Randy.
  • Mickey: Well, Woody?
  • Ringo Starr: Woody considered.
  • Woody: I only wish sir.
  • Ringo Starr: He said gravely.
  • Woody: That I thought of those names myself. If the dome fits...
  • Mickey: (clearing throat)
  • Mike, Brad and Randy: He made cars laugh at us.
  • Ringo Starr: Accused the characters. Mickey Mouse recovered. He been trying not to laugh himself.
  • Mickey: Did you, Woody?
  • Woody: Certainly not, Sir. No steam character will be as mean as that.
  • Ringo Starr: Zurg lurked up.
  • Mickey: Now, Zurg, you heard what Woody said.
  • Zurg: I can't understand it, Sir, to think that Woody of all characters. I'm dreadfully grieved, Sir, but no nothing.
  • Mickey: I see.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mickey. Zurg squirmed and hope he didn't.
  • Mickey: I'm sorry, Woody, but you must go to Kuzco's station for a while. I know he'll be glad to see him.
  • Woody: As you wish, Sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Woody trundled sadly away, while Zurg smirked with triumph.

A Close Shave

  • Ringo Starr: Woody the Cowboy Doll walked sadly to Kuzco's station.
  • Woody: It's not fair.
  • Ringo Starr: He complained.
  • Woody: Zurg has been telling lies about me and made Mickey Mouse and all the characters think I'm horrid.
  • Ringo Starr: Kuzco smiled.
  • Kuzco: I know you weren't, and so does Mickey Mouse. You wait and see. Why don't you help me with these pirates?
  • Ringo Starr: Woody felt happier with Kuzco, and set to work at once. The pirates were silly, heavy and noisy. The two characters have to work hard pushing and pulling all afternoon. At last, they reached the top of the hill.
  • Woody: Goodbye!
  • Ringo Starr: Whistled Woody, and rolled gently over the crossing to the other line. Woody love coasting down the hill, running easily with the wind whistling past. Suddenly...
  • Woody: It was the guard's warning whistle.
  • Pirates: Hurrah, hurrah, hurrah!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed the pirates.
  • Pirates: We've broken away, we've broken away! Chase him, bump him, throw him off the rails!
  • Ringo Starr: They yelled.
  • Woody's Driver: Hurry, Woody, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the driver. They raced through Kuzco's station, but the pirates were catching up.
  • Woody's Driver: As fast as we can, then they'll catch us gradually.
  • Ringo Starr: The driver was gaining control.
  • Woody's Driver: Another clear mile and we'll do it. Oh, glory, look at that!
  • Ringo Starr: Brad was just pulling out on they're line through the station ahead. Any minute, there could be a crash.
  • Woody's Driver: It's up to you now, Woody.
  • Ringo Starr: Cried the driver. Woody put every ounce of wait and steam against the pirates.
  • Woody: It's too late!
  • Ringo Starr: Woody groaned and shut his eyes. He veered into a siding where a barber had sent off shop. He was shaving a customer.
  • (Crash!)
  • Ringo Starr: The silly pirates were knocked their guard off his van, and left him far behind after he had whistled a warning. But the pirates didn't care. They were feeling very pleased with themselves.
  • Woody: Beg pardon, Sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Gasped Woody.
  • Woody: Excuse my intrusion.
  • Barber: No I won't.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the barber.
  • Barber: You frightened my customers! I'll teach you!
  • Ringo Starr: And he lathered Woody's face all other. Poor Woody! Jake was helping to pull the pirates away when Mickey Mouse arrived.
  • Barber: I do not like engines popping through my walls.
  • Ringo Starr: Fumed the barber.
  • Mickey: I appreciate your feelings.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mickey.
  • Mickey: But you must know that this cowboy doll and his crew had prevented a serious accident. It was a very close shave.
  • Barber: Oh.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the barber.
  • Barber: Oh! Excuse me.
  • Ringo Starr: He filled the basin of water to wash Woody's face.
  • Barber: I'm sorry. I didn't know you were been a brave cowboy.
  • Woody: That's all right, sir. I didn't know that either.
  • Mickey: You were very brave indeed.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mickey.
  • Mickey: I'm proud of you.
  • Ringo Starr: Mickey Mouse watched the rescue operation, then he had more news to Woody.
  • Mickey: And when you are properly washed and mended, you are coming home.
  • Woody: Home, sir? Do you mean the yard?
  • Mickey: Of course.
  • Woody: But, sir, they don't like me. They like Zurg.
  • Mickey: Not now. I never believed Zurg, so I sent him packing. The characters were sorry and want you back.
  • Ringo Starr: A few days later when he came home, there was a really rousing welcome for Woody the Cowboy Doll.

Better Late Than Never

  • Ringo Starr: The Disney characters were finding life difficult. Workmen were mending the viaduct on the main line. The arches needed strenghtany. Mickey Mouse did not want to close the railway while the work was done and so repairs took a long time. The characters have to take great care when crossing the viaduct and the delay often made them late on their journey to the junction where they knew Jake would be ready to collect his passengers. Jake grew crosser and crosser.
  • Jake: Time's time.
  • Ringo Starr: He grumbled.
  • Jake: Why should I keep my passengers waiting while Randy and Brad dawdle about all day on viaducts?
  • Randy: Don't blame me.
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Randy.
  • Randy: If we hurried to cross the viaduct, it might collapsed, and then you have no passengers at all. What would you do then?
  • Jake: Run my train on time for one thing.
  • Ringo Starr: Retorted Jake. He hurried away before Randy could answer. Lightning McQueen was impatient too. He was time to arrived just after Jake. His passengers found that, instead of going straight from the car till their train, they were kept waiting till Jake arrived. Soon Lightning grew cross with Jake.
  • Lightning: Late again!
  • Ringo Starr: He remarked as Jake panted wearily in.
  • Lightninng: We may be friends, but I thought you could go fast, Jake. It's time we had another race. I reckon I can beat you now.
  • Ringo Starr: Jake let off steam loudly.
  • Jake: Rubbish!
  • Ringo Starr: He hissed fiercely.
  • Jake: It's those main line characters. They differ about on the viaduct, and they blamed Mickey Mouse's workmen. It's just an excuse for laziness if you ask me.
  • Ringo Starr: One day, Brad was later than ever at the junction.
  • Brad: I'm sorry, Jake.
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed.
  • Brad: I was held up at the station, and the viaduct made it worse.
  • Jake: It's lucky for you I'm a guaratee connection.
  • Ringo Starr: Grumbled Jake. Before Brad could answer, he puffed importantly away.
  • Jake: Come along, come along!
  • Ringo Starr: He panted to the coaches. Janna and Hope did their best but Jake still found that he couldn't save much time. Suddenly, Jake saw Lightning ahead. His radiator was steaming.
  • Jake: What's the matter?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Jake.
  • Jake: You should be at the station by now. You're late.
  • Lightning: I feel dreadful.
  • Ringo Starr: Moaned Lightning.
  • Lightning: All upset inside and driver says he can't make me better. Thank goodness you're late too. Can you take my passengers please? They'll never get home overwise.
  • Jake: Of course.
  • Ringo Starr: Agreed Jake. He now felt sorry for Lightning, and promised to get help at the next station. Jake set off again already he felt much more cheerful and Lightning's passengers, travelling in Janna and Hope all reached home safely. When Lightning was better he came to thank Jake.
  • Lightning: I'm sorry I teased you about being late.
  • Jake: That's all right.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Jake.
  • Jake: I'm glad I can help. There are times when being late isn't such a bad thing after all.
  • Ringo Starr: With the last cheerful greeting, the two friends went back to work.

Captain Hook

  • Ringo Starr: Timon and Pumbaa are animals, and had arrived from Scotland to help Mickey Mouse, but only one animal had been expected. The animals meant well, but did cause confusion. Mickey Mouse had given them numbers, Timon 9 and Pumbaa 10, but he was still planning to send one animal home. There was Captain Hook in the yard that had taken a dislike to Pumbaa. Things always went wrong when he had to take it out. His trains were late and he was blamed. Pumbaa began to worry. Timon, his friend, was angry.
  • Timon: You're a muckle nuisance!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Timon.
  • Timon: It's to leave you behind I'd be wanting.
  • Captain Hook: You can't!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Captain Hook.
  • Captain Hook: I'm essential!
  • Timon: Och are you?
  • Ringo Starr: Timon burst out.
  • Timon: You're nothing but a screeching and a noise when all set is done. Spite Pumbaa, would ya? Take that!
  • Captain Hook: Ow! Oh, oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Captain Hook.
  • Timon: There's more coming should you misbehave.
  • Ringo Starr: The captain behave better after that. Until one day, Timon had an accident. The rails were slippery. He couldn't stop in time. Mickey Mouse was most annyoed.
  • Mickey Mouse: I am disappointed, Timon. I didn't expect such, er, clumsiness from you. I had decided to send Pumbaa back and keep you.
  • Timon: I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Timon.
  • Mickey Mouse: I should think so, too. You have upset my arrangements. Now Brad will have to help you with the goods work, while you have your tender mended. Brad won't like that.
  • Ringo Starr: Mickey Mouse was right. Al grumbled dreadfully.
  • Pumbaa: Anyone would think.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Pumbaa.
  • Pumbaa: That Timon had had his accident on purpose. I heard tell about a character and some tar wagons.
  • Brad: Shut up!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Brad.
  • Brad: It's not funny.
  • Ringo Starr: He didn't like to be remind about his own accident.
  • Pumbaa: Well, well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Pumbaa.
  • Pumbaa: Surely, Brad, it wasn't you. You didn't say.
  • Ringo Starr: Brad didn't say. He slouched sulkily away.
  • Captain Hook: He's cross!
  • Ringo Starr: Sniggered Captain Hook.
  • Captain Hook: We'll try to make him crosser still!
  • Pirates: Hold back!
  • Ringo Starr: Giggled the pirates to each other. Brad did his best, but he was exhausted when they reached Kuzco's station. Luckily, Pumbaa was there.
  • Brad: Help me up the hill, please!
  • Ringo Starr: Panted Brad.
  • Brad: These pirates are playing tricks.
  • Pumbaa: We'll show them.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Pumbaa. Slowly but surely, the snorting characters forced the pirates up the hill. But Brad was losing steam.
  • Brad: I can't do it, I can't do it!
  • Pumbaa: Leave it to me!
  • Ringo Starr: Shouted Pumbaa. The guard was anxious.
  • Guard: Go steady! The captain's breaking!
  • Ringo Starr: The captain was in pieces. No one had been hurt, and soon Kuzco came to clear the mess. Mickey Mouse was on board.
  • Mickey Mouse: I might have known it would be Pumbaa.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Kuzco: Pumbaa was grand, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Kuzco.
  • Kuzco: Brad had no steam left, but Pumbaa worked hard enough for three. I heard him from my yard.
  • Mickey Mouse: Two would have been enough.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Mickey Mouse.
  • Mickey Mouse: I want to be fair, Pumbaa, but I don't know. I really don't know.
  • Ringo Starr: Mickey Mouse was making up his mind about something, but that's another story.

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