• I made this, so I took the UK version, edited out the words "The Fat Controller", "Trucks" and "Guard" out and replaced them with "Sir Topham Hatt", "Freight Cars" and "Conductor". Enjoy!


  • Ringo Starr: Donald and Douglas are twins and have arrived from Scotland to help Sir Topham Hatt. But only one engine had been expected. The twins ment well, but did cause confusion. Sir Topham Hatt had given them numbers. Donald 9 and Douglas 10. But he was still planning to send one engine home. (Thomas' whistle blows) There was a breakvan in the yard that had taken a dislike to Douglas. Things always went wrong when he had to take it out. His trains were late and he was blamed. Douglas began to worry. Donald, his twin, was angry.
  • Donald: Ye're a muckle nuisance!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Donald.
  • Donald: It's ta leave ye behind, I'd be wantin'!
  • The Spiteful Breakvan: You can't.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the van.
  • The Spiteful Breakvan: I'm essential.
  • Donald: Och are ye?
  • Ringo Starr: Donald burst out.
  • Donald: Ye're naethin' but a screechin' an' a noise when a's said an' done. Spite Douggie wad ye? Tak that!
  • The Spiteful Breakvan: Oh! Oh! Oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried the van.
  • Donald: There's mair comin', syne ye misbehave!
  • Ringo Starr: The van behaved better after that. Until one day, Donald had an accident. The rails were slippery. He couldn't stop in time. (Donald crashes into the signalbox) Sir Topham Hatt was most annoyed.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I am dissappointed, Donald. I didn't expect such-um-clumsiness from you. I had dicided to send Douglas back and keep you.
  • Donald: I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Donald.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I should think so too. You have upset my arrangements. Now James will have to help with the goods work while you have your tender mended. James won't like that.
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt was right. James grumbled dreadfully.
  • Douglas: Anyone would think.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas.
  • Douglas: That Donald had his accident on purpose. I heard tell about an engine and some tar wagons.
  • James: Shut up!
  • Ringo Starr: Said James.
  • James: It's not funny.
  • Ringo Starr: He didn't like to be reminded of his own accident.
  • Douglas: Well, well, well.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas.
  • Douglas: Surely James, it wasn't you? You didn't say.
  • Ringo Starr: James didn't say. He slouched sulkily away.
  • The Spiteful Breakvan: He's cross.
  • Ringo Starr: Snickered the spiteful breakvan.
  • The Spiteful Breakvan: We'll try to make him crosser still.
  • Freight Cars: Hold back!
  • Ringo Starr: Giggled the freight cars to each other. James did his best, but he was exhausted when they reached Edward's station. Luckily Douglas was there.
  • James: Help me up the hill, please.
  • Ringo Starr: Panted James.
  • James: These freight cars are playing tricks.
  • Douglas: We'll show them.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas. (Douglas helps James with the freight cars) Slowly but surely, the snorting engines forced the freight cars up the hill. But James was losing steam.
  • James: I can't do it. I can't do it.
  • Douglas: Leave it to me!
  • Ringo Starr: Shouted Douglas. The conductor was anxious.
  • Conductor: Go steady. The van's breaking. (The spiteful breakvan breaks to pieces) The van was in pieces. No one had been hurt, and soon Edward came to clear the mess. Sir Topham Hatt was on board.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I might have known it would be Douglas.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Edward: Douglas was grand, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward.
  • Edward: James had no steam left, but Douglas worked hard enough for three. I heard him from my yard.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Two would have been enough.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I want to be fair Douglas. But, I don't know. I really don't know.
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt was making up his mind about something, but that's another story.


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