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Edward's Exploit and Other Thomas The Tank Engine Stories - Full is Pikachufreak's fan-fiction thing to make.

Description[]

  • Here's the full version of Edward's Exploit and Other Thomas The Tank Engine Stories. Stories narrated by Ringo Starr included: Donald and Douglas, The Deputation, The Diseasel and Edward's Exploit.

Transcript[]

  • (We open this CD with the Thomas Season 1-7 theme and the start of Donald and Douglas)
  • Ringo Starr: Donald and Douglas are twins and had arrived from Scotland to help Sir Topham Hatt, but only one engine had been expected. The twins meant well, but did cause confusion. Sir Topham Hatt had given them numbers, Donald 9 and Douglas 10, but he was still planning to send one engine home. There was a break van in the yard that had taken a dislike to Douglas. Things always went wrong when he had to take it out. His trains were late and he was blamed. Douglas began to worry. Donald, his twin, was angry.
  • Donald: You're a muckle nuisance!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Donald.
  • Donald: It's to leave you behind I'd be wanting.
  • Break Van: You can't!
  • Ringo Starr: Said the van.
  • Break Van: I'm essential!
  • Donald: Och are you?
  • Ringo Starr: Donald burst out.
  • Donald: You're nothing but a screeching and a noise when all set is done. Spite Douggie, would ya? Take that!
  • Break Van: Ow! Oh, oh!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried the van.
  • Donald: There's more coming should you misbehave.
  • Ringo Starr: The van behave better after that. Until one day, Donald had an accident. The rails were slippery. He couldn't stop in time. Donald wasn't hurt, but Sir Topham Hatt was most annyoed.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I am disappointed, Donald. I didn't expect such, er, clumsiness from you. I had decided to send Douglas back and keep you.
  • Donald: I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Donald.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I should think so, too. You have upset my arrangements. Now James will have to help you with the goods work, while you have your tender mended. James won't like that.
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt was right. James grumbled dreadfully about extra work.
  • Douglas: Anyone would think.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas.
  • Douglas: That Donald had had his accident on purpose. I heard tell about an engine and some tar wagons.
  • James: Shut up!
  • Ringo Starr: Said James.
  • James: It's not funny.
  • Ringo Starr: He didn't like to be remind about his own accident.
  • Douglas: Well, well, well!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas.
  • Douglas:Surely, James, it wasn't you. You didn't say.
  • Ringo Starr: James didn't say. He slouched sulkily away.
  • Break Van: He's cross!
  • Ringo Starr: Sniggered the spiteful break van.
  • Break Van: We'll try to make him crosser still!
  • Cars: Hold back!
  • Ringo Starr: Giggled the freight cars to each other. James did his best, but he was exhausted when they reached Edward's station. Luckily, Douglas was there.
  • James: Help me up the hill, please!
  • Ringo Starr: Panted James.
  • James: These freight cars are playing tricks.
  • Douglas: We'll show them.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Douglas. Slowly but surely, the snorting engines forced the freight cars up the hill. But James was losing steam.
  • James: I can't do it, I can't do it!
  • Douglas: Leave it to me!
  • Ringo Starr: Shouted Douglas. The conductor was anxious.
  • Conductor: Go steady! The van's breaking!
  • Ringo Starr: The van was in pieces. No one had been hurt, and soon Edward came to clear the mess. Sir Topham Hatt was board.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I might have known it would be Douglas.
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Edward: Douglas was grand, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward.
  • Edward: James had no steam left, but Douglas worked hard enough for three. I heard him from my yard.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Two would have been enough.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I want to be fair, Douglas, but I don't know. I really don't know.
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt was making up his mind about which engine to send away, but that's another story.
  • (A nameplate sequence occurs and we begin The Deputation)
  • Ringo Starr: Snow came early to the Island of Sodor. It was heavier than usual. Most engines hate snow. Donald and Douglas were used to it. Couple back to back with the van between their tenders and the snowplough in their fronts, they set to work. They puffed backwards and forward patrolling the line. Generally, the snow slipped away fiercly, but sometimes they found deeper drifts. Presently, they came to a drift which was larger than most. They charged it, and were just backing for another try when...
  • (Henry's whistle toots)
  • Douglas: Losh shakes, Donald! It's Henry!
  • Donald: Dinna fash yourself, Henry! Wait a while! We'll help you out!
  • Ringo Starr: Henry was very grateful. He saw all was not well. The twins were looking glum. They told him Sir Topham Hatt was making a decision.
  • Donald: He'll send us away for sure.
  • Percy: It's a shame.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Percy.
  • Gordon: A lot of nonsense about a broken signalbox.
  • Ringo Starr: Grumbled Gordon.
  • James: That spiteful break van too.
  • Ringo Starr: Put in James.
  • James: Good riddance. That's what I say.
  • Henry: They were splendid in the snow.
  • Ringo Starr: Added Henry.
  • Henry: It isn't fair.
  • Ringo Starr: They all agreed that something must be done, but none knew what. Percy decided to talk to Edward about it.
  • Edward: What you need...
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward.
  • Edward: ...is a deputation.
  • Ringo Starr: He explained what that was. Percy ran back quickly.
  • Percy: Edward says we need a depostation.
  • Gordon: Of course.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Gordon.
  • Gordon: The question is...
  • Henry: What is a desperation?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Henry.
  • Percy: It's when engines tell Sir Topham Hatt something's wrong.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Percy.
  • Duck: Did you say tell Sir Topham Hatt?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Duck thoughtfully. There was a long silence.
  • Gordon: I purpose.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Gordon.
  • Gordon: That Percy be our...um...disputation.
  • Percy: Me?!
  • Ringo Starr: Squeaked Percy.
  • Percy: I can't!
  • Henry: Rubbish, Percy.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Henry.
  • Henry: It's easy.
  • Gordon: That's settled then.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Gordon. Poor Percy wished it wasn't.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Hello, Percy. It's nice to be back.
  • Ringo Starr: Percy jumped.
  • Percy: Uh, yes sir, please sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: You look nervous, Percy. What's the matter?
  • Percy: Please, sir, they made me a desperation, sir, to speak to you sir. I don't like it, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt pondered.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Do you mean a deputation, Percy?
  • Percy: Yes sir, please sir. It's Donald and Douglas, sir. They say, sir, that if you send them away, sir, well, they'll be turned to scrap, sir. That would be dreadful, sir. Please, sir, don't send them away.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Thank you, Percy. That will do.
  • Ringo Starr: Later, Sir Topham Hatt spoke to the engines.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I had a deputation. I understand your feelings and I give a lot of thought to the matter.
  • Ringo Starr: He paused impressively.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Donald and Douglas, I hear that your work in the snow was good. You shall have a new coat of paint.
  • Ringo Starr: The twins were surprised.
  • Donald: Thank you, sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: But your names will be painted on you. We'll have no more mistakes.
  • Douglas: Thank you, sir. Does this mean that the both of us?
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt smiled.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: It means...
  • Ringo Starr: But the rest of his speech was drowned in a delighted chorus of cheers and whistles. The twins were here to stay.
  • (Engines whistling)
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin The Diseasel)
  • Ringo Starr: Bill and Ben are tank engine twins. Each has four wheels, a tiny chimney and dome and a small squat cab. Their freight cars are filled with China Clay. It is needed for pottery, paper, paint and many other things.
  • (Bill and Ben's whistles toot)
  • Ringo Starr: The twins are now kept busy pushing and pulling the cars for engines on the main line and for ships in the harbor. One morning, they arranged some cars and went away for more.
  • (The Freight cars disappeared)
  • Ringo Starr: They returned to find them all gone. The Twins were most surprised. Their drivers examined a patch of oil.
  • Drivers: That's a Diesel.
  • Ringo Starr: They said.
  • Bill: It's a what'll?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Bill?
  • Ben: A diseasel, i think.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Ben.
  • Ben: There's a notice about them in our shed.
  • Bill: Coughs and sneezles spread diseaels.
  • Ben: You had a cough in your smokebox yesterday. It's your fault the diseasel came.
  • Bill: It isn't!
  • Ben: It is!
  • Drivers: Stop arguing, you two.
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed their drivers.
  • Drivers: Let's go and rescue our freight cars.
  • Ringo Starr: Bill and Ben were horrified.
  • Bill: But the diseasel will magic us away like the freight cars.
  • Drivers: He won't magic us.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied their drivers.
  • Drivers: We're more likely magic him. Listen, he doesn't know you're twins. So we'll take away your names and numbers and then this is what we'll do.
  • Ringo Starr: Puffing hard, the twins set off on their journey to find the diesel. They were looking forward to playing tricks on him. Creeping into the yard, they found the diesel on a siding with missing cars. Ben hid behind, but Bill went bodly alongside. The diesel looked up.
  • BoCo: Do you mind?
  • Bill: Yes.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Bill.
  • Bill: I do. I want my cars back.
  • BoCo: These are mine.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the diesel.
  • BoCo: Go away.
  • Ringo Starr: Bill pretended to be frightened.
  • Bill: You're a big bully.
  • Ringo Starr: He whimpered.
  • Bill: You'll be sorry.
  • Ringo Starr: He ran back and hid behind the cars on the other side. Ben now came forward.
  • Ben: Car stealer!
  • Ringo Starr: Hissed Ben. He ran away too. Bill took his place. This went on and on till the diesel eyes nearly popped out.
  • BoCo: Stop! You're making me giddy.
  • Ringo Starr: The two engines gazed at him.
  • BoCo: Are there two of you?
  • Bill: Yes, we're twins.
  • BoCo: I might have known it.
  • Ringo Starr: Just then, Edward bustled up.
  • Edward: Bill and Ben, why are you playing here?
  • Bill: We're not playing.
  • Ringo Starr: Protested Bill.
  • Ben: We're rescuing our cars.
  • Ringo Starr: Squeaked Ben.
  • Ben: Even you don't take our cars without asking, but this diseasel did.
  • Edward: There's no cause to be rude.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward severly.
  • Edward: This engine is a Metropolitan Vickers, diesel electric type 2.
  • Ringo Starr: The twins were most impressed.
  • Bill: We're sorry, mister...er...
  • BoCo: Never mind.
  • Ringo Starr: The diesel smiled.
  • BoCo: Call me BoCo. I'm sorry I didn't understand about the cars.
  • Edward: That's all right then.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward.
  • Edward: Now off you go, Bill and Ben. Fetch BoCo's cars, then you take this lot. There's no real harm in them.
  • Ringo Starr: He said to BoCo.
  • Edward: But they're mattening at times.
  • Ringo Starr: BoCo chuckled.
  • BoCo: Mattening...
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • BoCo: ...is the word.
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Edward's Exploit)
  • Ringo Starr: Bertie the Bus was giving some visitors the tour on the Island of Sodor. It was their last afternoon, and Edward was preparing to take them to meet Bill and Ben. He found it hard to start the heavy train.
  • Henry: Did you see him straining?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Henry.
  • James: Positively painful.
  • Mr. Conductor 1: Remarked James.
  • Gordon: Just pathetic.
  • Ringo Starr: Grunted Gordon.
  • Gordon: He should give up and be preserved before it's too late.
  • Duck: Shut up!
  • Ringo Starr: Burst out Duck.
  • Duck: You're all jealous. Edward's better than any of you.
  • BoCo: You're right, Duck.
  • Ringo Starr: Said BoCo.
  • BoCo: Edward's old, but he'll surprised us all.
  • Edward: I've done it, we're off! I've done it, we're off!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward, as he finally puffed out of the station. Bill and Ben were delighted to see the visitors. They loved being photographed. Later, they take the party to the China Clay Works in the break van special. Everyone have a splendid time, and the visitors were most impressed. Then, Edward took the visitors home. On the way, the weather changed. Wind and rain buffered in Edward. His sanding gear failed, and his fireman rode in front dropping sand on the rails by hand. Suddenly, Edward's wheels slipped fiercely and with a shrieking crack, something broke. The crew inspected the damage. Repairs took some time.
  • Driver: One of your crank pins broke, Edward?
  • Ringo Starr: Said his driver.
  • Driver: We've taken your side rods off. Now you're like an old fashioned engine. Can you get these people home? They must start back tonight?
  • Edward: I'll try, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Promised Edward. Edward puffed and pulled his hardest. But his wheels kept slipping, and he couldn't start the heavy train. The passengers were anxious. The driver, fireman and conductor went along the train, making adjustments between the coaches.
  • Driver: We've loosened the couplings, Edward. Now you can pick up your coaches one by one, just as you do with freight cars.
  • Edward: That'll be much easier.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Edward.
  • Edward: Come on!
  • Ringo Starr: He puffed, and moved cautiously forward. The first coach moving help to start the second and the second help the third.
  • Edward: I've done it, I've done it!
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Edward.
  • Driver: Steady, boy.
  • Ringo Starr: Said his driver.
  • Driver: Well done, boy! You've got them, you've got them!
  • Ringo Starr: And he listened happily to Edward's steady beat, as he forced slowly but surely ahead. At last, battered, wearly, but unbeaten, Edward steamed in. Henry was waiting for the visitors with the special train.
  • Edward: Peep peep!
  • Ringo Starr: Sir Topham Hatt angrily pointed to the clock, but excited passengers cheered and thanked Edward, his driver and fireman. Duck and BoCo saw to it that Edward was left in peace. Gordon and James remain respectfully silent.
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