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Cast

  • Sprocket as Rowlf the Dog

Lyrics

(Sprocket starts playing the piano.)

Sprocket: You may not know this, but I'm really a very sentimental dog. I cry easily. Onions, for instance, always make me cry.

(He sings "I Never Harmed an Onion", and is a sobbing wreck by the end of the song.)

Sprocket: I'll admit I split bananas
Take Easter eggs and make them dye
But I never harmed an onion
So why should they make me cry?
Once I saw a salad dressing
My face got radish - my, oh, my
But I never harmed an onion
So why should they make me cry?
Potatoes I've mashed and berries
I've crushed I've made an artichoke and that's not all
I've also whipped cream and beaten an egg
Yes, I've even made a melon ball
Of all the things above I'm guilty
If punished, I would know just why
But I never harmed an onion
So why should they make me cry?
Oh, why should they make me cry?

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