James the Clown Engine

James the Clown Engine is a Season 4 episode of Thomas the ERTL Adventures.

Featured Characters

• Thomas
• Edward
• Henry
• Gordon (mentioned)
• James
• Percy (cameo)
• Toby (cameo)
• Duck
• Donald and Douglas (cameo)
• Oliver
• Emily (cameo)
• Salty
• Daisy (mentioned)
• Victor
• Kevin (non-speaking role)
• The Flying Kipper (non-speaking role)
• Sir Topham Hatt

Plot

James hates pulling the Flying Kipper while Henry is at the Sodor Steamworks having new side rods and crashes into a circus tent.

Transcript

• Narrator: While Henry's side rods were being repaired, all the engines had to take the Flying Kipper. It's a special train of vans filled with boxes of fish, which goes to markets in London and other places on the mainland. James hated pulling the Flying Kipper.
• James: All those smelly vans, you can't get the smell off your tender for weeks!
• Salty: Arr! I'm very fond of a good Kipper, James matey.
• James: You're welcome to it, Salty!
• Salty: A right old misery, aren't you today, James? You got out of the shed by the wrong door this morning and no mistake!
• Narrator: James remembered the last time he took the Flying Kipper, and crates of fish fell on his track, and ended up slipping on them because of the oil from the fish.
• James: (to the other engines) I don't want to do anymore smelly fish work! It's all because that green caterpillar Henry broke his side rods!
• Thomas: You're lucky you didn't have fish in your water tank.
• Oliver: And least you didn't crash into the back of the train, either.
• Narrator: Then, the yard manager came to see James.
• Yard Manager: James, you're going to be late for your work! So there's no time to be lallygagging, now get to work!
• Narrator: James snorted, and blew a big cloud of steam as he puffed away. But luckily for James, there were only two vans filled with the smell of fish, ready to take to market.
• James: Phew. Thank god there's only two trucks to be taken away!
• Narrator: When the crates were loaded into the trucks without mishap, James was coupled up to the vans, and puffed away, sighing with relief, but he was still fuming, because the fish vans still had an awful smell from the fish!
• James: (disgusted) Ugh-!!! I had enough of this smell!
• James' driver: Now James, we mustn't rush to get the job done. Be patient, and we're nearly to the market!
• Narrator: However, after his driver warned him, James had an idea...
• James: (to self) Maybe if I rush, maybe I will get some nice long rest!
• Narrator: So, James went faster and faster, so fast, the fish vans were rattling and rocking.
• Edward: (pulling Henry's express) Slow down, James!!!
• Narrator: But James took no notice to anyone telling him to slow down, and kept going faster. He came up Gordon's hill, rushed up to the top, and he rushed down the other side.
• James: This is fun! I'll get this job done in no time!
• Narrator: By the market, a circus was arriving on Sodor, and the circus was ready for their performance. But James didn't know that a patch of oil had spilled from Edward's oil tankers, which made the tracks slippery, and meant the engines couldn't stop.
• James: We're getting closer!
• Narrator: When he arrived at the market, his driver called out.
• James' driver: Slow down!! We're gonna have an accident!!
• James: WHAT?!
• Narrator: His driver put on the brakes, but James had slipped on the oil, and he crashed into the circus tent! {CRASH} Luckily, no one was hurt, but James was now covered in cream from the cream pies. Everybody was shocked to see James, and thought it was very funny.
• Clown #1: James is like a clown!
• Clown #2: If he is a clown, let's throw tomatoes at him!
• Narrator: And so, the clowns threw tomatoes all over James' face and eyes.
• James: (splat) (splat) OW! (splat) Agh! (splat) Oh, yuck! Now I'm all dirty and sticky!
• James' driver: It'll serve you right for not being patient!
• Narrator: Poor James felt terrible, his face underneath the cream and tomatoes went like his paint. Later, after the circus was over, Edward took James' fish vans away, and Duck arrived with Rocky and Sir Topham Hatt. Sir Topham Hatt was very cross!
• Sir Topham Hatt: James, I wasn't very pleased that you were crashing into a circus tent, now that you ruined everything! You were running around with fish vans! And now, you are causing confusion and delay! And, as punishment, you'll be in your shed for two months!
• James: TWO MONTHS?! YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!!
• Sir Topham Hatt: Oh, I'm serious! Now Duck will take you to the Sodor Steamworks where Henry is being repaired, before he takes you to your shed, and also, he'll take over your work, and Gordon is also taking over your express runs while you're away for now.
• James: Oh no, I'm sorry, sir!
• Sir Topham Hatt: Well unfortunately, James, sorry isn't in the cover this time!!!
• Narrator: James felt sad and Duck started to laugh.
• Duck: (giggling) Well, James, we always knew that would happen to you!
• James: Shut up and get me to the Steamworks!
• Narrator: Duck took James to the Sodor Steamworks, where Henry had just been repaired. Duck was giggling about James' mishap throughout the entire trip, and was still giggling when he left. Victor was surprised when he saw James.
• Victor: Flaming fireboxes! What's happened now, James?
• James: I crashed into a circus tent, and got my face covered in pie and tomatoes.
• Henry: (giggling) James, you were a clown at the circus today, eh? I thought you were to finish my work!
• James: I'm sorry, Henry, but I just didn't want your work. I really had enough of it, because I had thought of going faster to get the job done, but I crashed. And I indeed look like a clown.
• Henry: Well, you're no longer James the Really Splendid Red Engine, then! You're now James the Clown Engine!
• Narrator: After Henry called James that new name, Henry, Victor, Kevin and the workmen were laughing out loud, but James didn't like the new name. He started to cry.
• James: (crying) PLEASE STOP IT!!!
• Duck: (consoling James) Oh, James, it's just a washdown.
• James: (crying throughout) I KNOW!!! I just, want, to, stay, on SODOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (continues crying)
• Henry, Victor and Kevin: (still laughing)
• Duck: Will he be okay, Victor.
• Victor: Yeah, Duck.
• Narrator: After James was repaired, the name stuck for a few weeks afterwards. James vowed he'd never take the Flying Kipper ever again.