Max was born on January 16, 1998.
Elizabeth: Waaaaaaa! It hurts so much!
Zack: What's wrong, Elizabeth?
Elizabeth: I had a large pain in my stomach. Just take me to the hospital.
Zack: Is she going to be fine, doctor?
Doctor: Yes. Go push, push, push, push harder, push, push. (finally, the baby pops out of Elizabeth's stomach) Congrats, Elizabeth! It's a boy.
Zack: We should call the baby boy Max.
Elizabeth: (whispering) What a three-letter name for such a tiny baby boy. (chuckles)
(Max and his parents watch Big Bag on TV)
Elizabeth: Let's go to school, you little monkey.
Mr. Lawrence: Okay, class. Today we'll use addition. Max, what's two plus two?
Max: It was four.
Mr. Lawrence: That's right, Max. And you've said your first words.
Elizabeth: Hooray, Max! You're growing! I love you, son.
Max: I love you too, mommy. (giggles)
(Max's parents died from a subway crash)
Max: (sobbing) Good-bye, mom and dad! I'll miss both of you very much!
(R.I.P.: Zack and Elizabeth (1967 - 2010))
(Max has his foster parents Alan and Catherine, but they ground him for the first time)
Alan: Max, you're grounded for 9988776655443322110000000123456789012312300 years!
(Max grounds his parents!)
Max: (talking in his world's deepest voice) STOP GROUNDING ME FOR ENOUGH!!! NOW YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR 999 CUPAJILLION 45 THOUSAND AND THREE INFINITY YEARS!!!! (his parents walk away crying) YAY, I GOT MY REVENGE!! YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!
February 16, 2012