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Meilin For Hire is a Kids' WB!, FOX Kids, The FOX Box and 4KidsTV spoof to Daisy For Hire.

Cast

  • Ash Ketchum (from Pokemon) as Thomas
  • Mushra (from Shinzo) as Percy
  • Puss In Boots (from The Adventures of Puss In Boots) as Toby
  • Chance Furlong and Jake Clawson (from SWAT Kats) as Donald and Douglas
  • Meilin Rae (from Cardcaptors) as Daisy
  • Bugs Bunny (from Looney Tunes) as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Principal Kelly and Miss Darkholme (from X-Men: Evolution) as The Stationmaster and his wife
  • Lorelei Brooks and Jordan Hanson (from Goldfish Warning!) as Annie and Clarabel
  • Clover (from All Hail King Julien) as Henrietta
  • Beedrill as Troublesome Trucks

Scripts (told by Ringo Starr for the UK)

Ash Comes To Breakfast

  • Ringo Starr: Ash Ketchum has worked his route for many years, and knows it very well.
  • Ash's Driver: You know just where to stop, Ash.
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed his driver.
  • Ash's Driver: You could almost manage it without me.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash had become conceited. He didn't realize his driver was joking. Later, he boasted to the others.
  • Ash: Driver says I don't need him now.
  • Mushra: Don't be so daft!
  • Ringo Starr: Snorted Mushra.
  • ​Puss: I'd never go without my driver.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Puss, earnestly.
  • ​PussI'd be frightened.
  • Ash: Puh!
  • Ringo Starr: Boasted Ash.
  • Ash: I'm not scared!
  • Puss: You'd never dare!
  • Ash: I would then, you'll see.
  • Ringo Starr: Next morning, the firelighter came. Ash drowsed comfortably, and the warmth spread through his body. Mushra and Puss were still asleep. Ash suddenly remembered.
  • Ash: Silly stick-in-the-muds!
  • Ringo Starr: He chuckled.
  • Ash: I'll show them. Driver said I could manage without him. I'll just go out, then I'll stop and WHEESH! That'll make them jump.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash thought he was being clever. Really, he was only moving because a careless cleaner had meddled with his body. He soon found his mistake. He tried to wheesh, but he couldn't. He tried to stop, but he couldn't. He just kept rolling along. He didn't dare look at what was coming next; there was the principal's house. The principal was just about to have breakfast.
  • Ash: Horrors!
  • Ringo Starr: Cried Ash, and shut his eyes. (CRASH!) The house rocked, broken glass tinkled, plaster was everywhere. Ash had collected a bush on his travels. He peered into the room through its leaves. He couldn't speak. The principal was furious. His wife picked up her plate.
  • Darkholme: You miserable trainer!
  • Ringo Starr: She scolded.
  • Darkholme: Just look what you've done to our breakfast! Now I shall have to cook some more!
  • Ringo Starr: She banged the door. More plaster fell. This time, it fell on Ash. Ash felt depressed. Workmen propped up the house with strong poles, and laid a path through the garden. Meanwhile, Chance and Jake arrived.
  • Jake: Dinna fash yourself, Ash, we'll soon have you back on the path!
  • Ringo Starr: They laughed. Chance and Jake working hard, managed to haul Ash back to safety. Bits of fencing, a bush, and a broken window frame festuned his front, which was badly twisted. The cats laughed and left him. Ash was in disgrace. There was worse to come.
  • Bugs: You are a very naughty trainer.
  • Ash: I know, sir. I'm sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Ash's voice was muffled behind his bush.
  • Bugs: You must go to the workshop and have your front mended, it will be a long job.
  • Ash: Yes, sir.
  • Bugs: Meanwhile, a girl from Hong Kong will do your work.
  • Ash: A G-g-girl, sir?
  • Ringo Starr: Ash spluttered.
  • Bugs: Yes, Ash. Girls always stay in their houses until they are wanted. Girls never galavant off to breakfast in principal's houses.

Meilin Rae

  • Ringo Starr: Mushra and Puss were worried. Ash's recent accident had caused a great deal of trouble, and Bugs Bunny was waiting for them with important news.
  • Bugs: Here...
  • Ringo Starr: He said.
  • Bugs: ...is Meilin Rae, who has come to help while Ash is...indisposed.
  • Mushra: Please, sir?
  • Ringo Starr: Asked Mushra.
  • Mushra: Will she go, sir, when Ash comes back, sir?
  • Bugs: That depends.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Bugs Bunny.
  • Bugs: Meanwhile, however long she stays, I hope you will both make her welcome and comfortable.
  • Puss: Yes, sir, we'll try, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the characters.
  • Bugs: Good. Run along now and show her the shed. She will want a rest after her journey.
  • Ringo Starr: Meilin was hard to pleased. She shuddered at the engine shed.
  • Meilin: This is dreadfully smelly. I'm highly sprung, and anything smelly is bad for my swerves.
  • Ringo Starr: Next, they tried the carriage shed.
  • Meilin: This is better.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Meilin.
  • Meilin: But whatever is that rubbish?
  • Ringo Starr: The rubbish turned out to be Lorelei, Jordan and Clover who were most offended.
  • Lorelei: We won't stay here to be insulted.
  • Ringo Starr: They fumed. Mushra and Puss had to take them away and spend half the night soothing their hurt feelings. The characters woke next morning feeling exhausted. Meilin, on the other hand, felt bright and cheerful.
  • Meilin: Oooh! Oooh!
  • Ringo Starr: She tooted, as she came out of the yard and back to the station.
  • Meilin: Look at me.
  • Ringo Starr: She purred to the passengers.
  • Meilin: I'm the latest Hong Kong girl, highly sprung and right up to date. You won't want Ash's bumpy old Lorelei and Jordan now.
  • Ringo Starr: The passengers waited for Meilin to start, but she didn't. She saw that the milk van was about to be coupled to her and was most indigment.
  • Meilin: Do they except me to pull that?
  • Meilin's Driver: Surely.
  • Ringo Starr: Said her driver.
  • Meilin's Driver: You can pull one van.
  • Meilin: I won't.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Meilin.
  • Meilin: Mushra can do it. He loves messing about with pirates.
  • Ringo Starr: She began to shudder violently.
  • Meilin's Driver: Nonsense.
  • Ringo Starr: Said her driver.
  • Meilin's Driver: Come on now, back down.
  • Ringo Starr: Meilin lurched backwards. She was so cross that she blew a fuse.
  • Meilin: Told you.
  • Ringo Starr: She said and stopped. Everyone argued with her but it was no use.
  • Meilin: It's fitter's orders.
  • Ringo Starr: She said.
  • Passengers: What is?
  • Meilin: My fitter's a very nice man. He comes every week and exams me carefully. Meilin, he says, never never pull. You're highly sprung and pulling is bad for your swerves. So that's how it is.
  • Ringo Starr: Finished Meilin.
  • Stationmaster: Stuff and nonsense.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the stationmaster.
  • Shunter: I can't understand.
  • Ringo Starr: Said the shunter.
  • Shunter: Whatever made Bugs Bunny send us such a feeble...
  • Meilin: Feeble? Feeble?!
  • Ringo Starr: Spluttered Meilin.
  • Meilin: Let me...
  • Passengers: Stop arguing!
  • Ringo Starr: Grumbled the passengers.
  • Passengers: We're late already.
  • Ringo Starr: So they uncoupled the van, and Meilin purred away feeling very pleased with herself. She can now enjoyed her journey.
  • Meilin: That's a good story.
  • Ringo Starr: She chuckled.
  • Meilin: I'll do just what work I choose, and no more.
  • Ringo Starr: But she said it to herself.

Mushra's Predicament

  • Ringo Starr: Meilin Rae's work on the countryside was full of surprises. But she was frightened to bulls and cows, and she remain very lazy and stubborn. One day, Puss brought Clover to the station where Percy was grumbling shunting.
  • Puss: Hello, Mushra. I see Meilin's left the milk behind again.
  • Percy: I had to make a special journey within I suppose. Anyone would think I've nothing to do.
  • Ringo Starr: Grumbled Mushra.
  • Puss: Tell you what?
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Puss.
  • Puss: I'll take the milk, you fetch my Beedrill.
  • Ringo Starr: Their drivers and stationmaster agreed. Mushra had never been to the quarry before. He began ordering the Beedrill about.
  • Mushra: Hurry along.
  • Ringo Starr: He said. The Beedrill grumbled to each other.
  • Beedrill: This is Puss' place! Mushra's got no right to poke his funnel in here and push us around.
  • Ringo Starr: They whispered and pass the word.
  • Beedrill: Pay Mushra out! Pay Mushra out!
  • Mushra: Come along.
  • Ringo Starr: Puffed Mushra.
  • Mushra: No nonsense.
  • Beedrill: We'll give him nonsense.
  • Ringo Starr: Giggled the Beedrill. But they followed so quietly that Mushra thought they were under control. Suddenly, they saw a notice ahead: All Trains Stop To Pin Down Brakes.
  • Mushra: Peep peep! Brakes, Conductor, please!
  • Ringo Starr: But before he could check them the pirates surged ahead.
  • Pirates: On! On!
  • Ringo Starr: They cried.
  • Mushra: Help! Help!
  • Ringo Starr: Whistled Mushra. The man on duty at the crossing rushed to warn traffic with his red flag but was too late to switch Mushra to the runaway sidings. Frantically trying to grip the rails Mushra slid into the yard.
  • Mushra: Peep! Peep! Look out!
  • (Crash!)
  • Ringo Starr: The break van was in smithereens. Mushra's driver and fireman had jumped clear but Mushra was stranded. Next day, Bugs Bunny arrived. Puss and Meilin had helped to clear the wreckage but Mushra remained on his perch of Beedrill.
  • Bugs: We must now try.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Bugs Bunny.
  • Bugs: To run a branch line with Puss and a Hong Kong girl. You have put us in an awkward.
  • Mushra: I am sorry, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Replied Mushra.
  • Bugs: You must stay here till we are ready. Perhaps it will teach you to be more careful with Beedrill.
  • Ringo Starr: Mushra sighed. The Beedrill groaned beneath his wheels. He quite understood about awkward predicaments. Bugs Bunny spoke severely to Daisy too.
  • Bugs: My characters work hard. I send lazy characters away.
  • Ringo Starr: Meilin was ashamed.
  • Meilin: However, Puss says you worked hard after Mushra's accident. So you shall have another chance.
  • Meilin: Thank you, sir.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Meilin.
  • Meilin: I will work hard, sir. Puss says he'll help me.
  • Bugs: Excellent. What Puss doesn't know about branch line problems isn't worth knowing. But our Puss's an experienced character.
  • Ringo Starr: Next day, Ash came back, and Mushra was sent to be mended. Lorelei and Jordan were delighted to see Ash again and he took them to a run at once. All were now friends, and Puss has taunt Meilin a great deal. She shooed a cow all by herself the other day. That show's you, doesn't it?

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