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This is Mr. Oldman Sketch #13 from Season 3 of The Amanda Show.

Transcript[]

  • (Redhead sits on the couch, then picks up the phone and starts dialing)
  • (Mr. Oldman's phone rings)
  • Mr. Oldman: Uh, the only thing worse than children is nothing! (picks up the phone and answers) Hello?
  • Redhead: Hello, Mr. Oldman.
  • Mr. Oldman: Yes, who's calling my phone?
  • Redhead: This is Sally Poofinda.
  • Mr. Oldman: But I'm not familiar with any Sally Poofinda-doofinda-nothin'.
  • Redhead: Would you like to answer a question and win $1,000,000?
  • Mr. Oldman: Why, yes. I have medical problems.
  • Redhead: Hello? This is Sally Poofinda.
  • Mr. Oldman: Yes. We already established that.
  • Redhead: Would you like to answer a question and win $1,000,000?
  • Mr. Oldman: Yes! Go ahead and ask the question.
  • Redhead: Is Mr. Oldman there?
  • Mr. Oldman: Yes! I am he!
  • Redhead: Would you like to answer a question and win $1,000,000?
  • Mr. Oldman: I told ya, yes. Now, please ask your question. I have a meatloaf in my oven.
  • Redhead: Would you like to answer a question and win $1,000,000?
  • Mr. Oldman: FOR THE UMPTEENTH TIME! Yes!
  • Redhead: Hello?
  • Mr. Oldman: (silently) Hello?
  • Redhead: This is Sally Poofinda.
  • Mr. Oldman: I know that much!
  • Redhead: Well, would you like to answer a question and win $1,000,000?
  • Mr. Oldman: Yes! Now please ask your question! My meatloaf is starting to burn.
  • Redhead: Would you like to answer a question?
  • Mr. Oldman: I CAN'T ANSWER THE QUESTION... unless you ask it first!
  • Redhead: Is Mr. Oldman there?
  • Mr. Oldman: I told you already I... speaking.
  • Redhead: Whatcha doin'?
  • Mr. Oldman: I'm waiting to hear your question. (his meat loaf explodes) Oh, my meatloaf! (the meatloaf hits him in the head, knocking him down) (he stands back up) I was crazed by my meatloaf. (Redhead makes funny faces) It skipped right by my head and nearly bruised it. Hello? You have the wrong number! Hello? What is your question? I don't wanna be hit with another meatloaf. Hello?
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