• Kermit the Frog as Big Bird
  • Rizzo the Rat as Elmo


Kermit the Frog: Well I'm a tall, tall Texan
I'm talking tall, tall, tall
(He comes from Texas and he's really tall)
I change a light bulb easy
I play great basketball
(He's great at light bulbs and at basketball)
Even the longest long-johns
Are always way too small
(The longest long-johns always way too small)

Rizzo the Rat: Rizzo's a short, short Texan
He's talking real petite
(He comes from Texas and he's real petite)
Rizzo has tripped my share of bad guys
So better watch your feet
(He trips up bad guys, better watch your feet)
(spoken) Not you, Kermit.
Even one tiny little meatball
Is way too big to eat
(One tiny meatball's way too big to eat)

Kermit the Frog: Yeah, when I drop my toothpick
There's just one guy to call

Rizzo the Rat: Ya call a short, short Texan
'Cause it's too low for y'all
And when Rizzo need some boosting
To hop onto my horse

Kermit the Frog: You call a tall, tall Texan
Like your buddy, of course

Rizzo the Rat: (spoken) Of course! Hee-haw! (scatting) Yeah!

Kermit the Frog: Well, I'm a tall, tall Texan
Hitting the dusty trail
(He's a tall Texan 'bout to hit the trail)

Rizzo the Rat: Kermit the Frog. (coughing) Boy, it sure is dusty. Next to a short, short Texan
We stick together without fail
(They're gonna stick together without fail)

Kermit the Frog and Rizzo the Rat: We'd like to thank you folks for listening'
To this here short tall tale

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