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Cast:

  • Sheen Estevez (Jimmy Neutron) as Larry the Cucumber
  • King Candy (Wreck-It Ralph) as Scallion #1 as a Bank Robber
  • Boober Gorg (Fraggle Rock) as Pa Grape as a Viking
  • Arnold (Hey Arnold) as The Peach as The IRS Agent
  • Jimmy Neutron as Bob the Tomato as Santa Claus

Lyrics

Narrator: And now it's time for Silly Songs with Sheen, the part of the show where Sheen comes out and sings, a silly song. It's Christmas Eve, and Sheen is anxiously awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus with a plate of cookies.

Sheen: Oh, Santa, I can't wait for you come, I just can't wait for you to come and I've got cookies. Three yummy cookies. Just for you for when you come. Oh me, for you for when you come, because it's Christmas. (the door is knocked on three times) Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a boy like me, a good boy like me?

Narrator: Sheen is surprised to be greeted not by Santa, but a crafty bank robber.

Sheen: Who are you?

King Candy: I'm a bank robber! And I've come to rob your bank. Oh, yes! I've come to rob your bank, and I've come to take your dimes and swipe your nickels. So stand back, step aside you silly kid! And let me in.

Narrator: Although frightened by the intruder, in the spirit of Christmas, Sheen makes an offering.

Sheen: I'm not a banker, I have no bank, my robbing friend, but I have cookies, three yummy cookies. And I don't have nickels, but please take this, my robbing friend. Eat one of these, my robbing friend. They are for Santa, but you may have one.

Narrator: The bank robber is truly touched by Sheen's good will But Sheen, although momentarily distracted, is still excited about seeing Santa.

(Sheen and King Candy sing simultainiously)

Sheen: Oh, Santa.

King Candy: I'm a robber!

Sheen: I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come.

King Candy: I came to rob your bank, oh yes! I came to rob your bank.

Sheen: And I've got cookies.

King Candy: You shared a cookie.

Sheen: Two yummy cookies.

King Candy: A yummy cookie.

Sheen: Just for you for when you come, oh me, for you for when you come.

King Candy: Though I'd love to take your dimes, perhaps another time.

Both: Because it's Christmas.

(Three more knocks on the door)

Sheen: Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a boy like me, a good boy like me?

Narrator: Once again, it is not Santa who has come to Sheen's door, but this time a savage Norseman.

Sheen: Who are you?

Boober: I'm a viking! And I've come to take your land, oh yes! I've come to take your land. And I've come to burn your crops and steal your horses. And I've come to step on your chickens. And soil your quilts! Oy, oy.

Narrator: Although frightened by the intruder, in the spirit of Christmas Sheen makes an offering.

Sheen: I don't have land, I don't have crops, my viking friend, but I have cookies. Two yummy cookies. And I don't have horses, but please take this, my viking friend. Eat one of these, my viking friend. They are for Santa, but you may have one.

Narrator: The viking is also touched by Uncle Sam's good will, but Sheen's thoughts are still with Santa.

(Sheen and Boober sing simultainiously)

Sheen: Oh, Santa.

Boober: I'm a viking!

Sheen: I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come.

Boober: I came to take your land, oh yes! I came to take your land.

Sheen: I've got a cookie.

Boober: You shared a cookie.

Sheen: A yummy cookie.

Boober: A yummy cookie.

Sheen: Just for you for when you come, oh me, for you for when you come.

Boober: Though I'd love to soil your quilts, I don't think that I wilt.

Both: Because it's Christmas.

(Three more knocks on the door)

Sheen: Could that be Santa? Could that be him? Could it be the one who brings presents for a boy like me, a good boy like me

Narrator: Sheen is greeted now by an agent of the Internal Revenue Service.

Sheen: Who are you?

Arnold: I'm from the IRS. And I've come to tax your- (Sheen shuts the door)

Sheen: Oh, Santa, I can't wait for you to come, I just can't wait for you to come.

(Jimmy Neutron pops out of the chimney)

Sheen: It's finally Santa! It's finally him! At last the one who brings presents for a boy like me, a good boy like me!

Jimmy: I'm Santa, and I've come to bring you gifts, oh yes! I've come to bring you gifts. And I've come to stuff your stockings, oh ho ho ho. And I've come to jiggle my belly, and wiggle my nose. (Spoken to Boober and King Candy) Hey, wait a minute. Isn't that my belt? And what are you doing with my hat? So you're the ones!

King Candy: Wait a minute, I can explain!

Boober: We've changed!

Jimmy: Nobody messes with Santa, you know that, don't you? You've been very naughty and I've got a list!

(Jimmy chases King Candy and Boober out the door)

(Arnold enters)

Arnold: Did you claim that? (Sheen shakes his head, and Arnold takes the cookie and exits.)

Sheen: Merry....Christmas!

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