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RS Mr. Conductor the Conductor and Friends is a TV/Thomas parody of the Thomas and Friends UK video, Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends. It feature thirteen first season episodes of RS Mr. Conductor the Conductor and Friends.

Cast

  • RS Mr. Conductor (from Shining Time Station) as Thomas
  • Edd (from Ed, Edd n Eddy) as Edward
  • Homer (from The Simpsons) as Henry
  • Garfield (from Garfield and Friends) as Gordon
  • Schemer (from Shining Time Station) as James
  • Patty (from The Simpsons) as Annie
  • Selma (from The Simpsons) as Clarabel
  • Scooby Doo (from Scooby Doo) as Terence
  • Mayor Adam West (from Family Guy) as Sir Topham Hatt
  • Eustace (from Courage the Cowardly Dog) as Jeremiah Jobling
  • Principal Skinner (from The Simpsons) as The Inspector
  • Flowers (from Alice in Wonderland) as The Coaches
  • Goombas (from Mario) as The Troublesome Trucks
  • Ten Cents (from TUGS) as Bertie (not named, does not speak)
  • Carol Pewterschimdt (from Family Guy) as Lady Hatt (cameo)
  • Phil (from Rugrats) as Stephen Hatt (cameo)
  • Sally Acorn (from Sonic the Hedgehog) as The Storyteller (cameo)
  • Everyone else as Themselves

Episodes

  1. RS Mr. Conductor and Garfield
  2. Edd and Garfield
  3. The Sad Story of Homer
  4. Edd, Garfield and Homer
  5. RS Mr. Conductor's Flowers
  6. RS Mr. Conductor and the Goombas
  7. RS Mr. Conductor and the Breakdown Crane
  8. Schemer and the Flowers
  9. Troublesome Goombas
  10. Schemer and the Express
  11. RS Mr. Conductor and the Guard
  12. RS Mr. Conductor Goes Fishing
  13. RS Mr. Conductor, Scooby Doo and the Snow

Transcript

RS Mr. Conductor and Garfield

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor is a conductor who lives in a big station in TV Land. He's a cheeky little conductor with two small legs, a small blue hat, a small conductor outfit and a whistle.

He's a fussy little conductor, too, always taking flowers about ready for the big TV Characters to take on long journeys.

And when TV characters come in, he takes the flowers away so that the big TV characters can go and rest.

RS Mr. Conductor thinks no TV character works as hard as he does. He loves playing tricks on them, including Garfield, the biggest and proudest character of all.

RS Mr. Conductor likes whistling rudely at him."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Wake up, lazybones, why don't you work hard, like me?"

Narrator: "One day, after taking some flowers on a journey, Garfield arrived back at the sidings, very tired. He was just going to sleep when RS Mr. Conductor came up in his cheeky way."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Wake up, lazybones, do some hard work for a change! You can't catch me!"

Narrator: "And off he ran, laughing.

Instead of going to sleep again, Garfield thought how he could get back at RS Mr. Conductor.

One morning, RS Mr. Conductor wouldn't wake up. His driver and fireman couldn't make him start. His gold dust was low and there was not enough strength. It was nearly time for the express. People were waiting, but the flowers weren't ready.

At last, RS Mr. Conductor started."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Oh dear, oh dear!"

Narrator: "He yawned.

He fussed into the station where Garfield was waiting."

Garfield: "Hurry up, you!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Hurry yourself!"

Narrator: "Replied RS Mr. Conductor.

Garfield began making his plan."

Garfield: "Yes."

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "I will."

Narrator: "And almost before the flowers stopped moving, Garfield reversed quickly and held the first flower's petal."

Garfield: "Get in quickly, please."

Narrator: "He whistled.

RS Mr. Conductor usually pushed behind the flowers to help them start, but he was always let go off first. This time, Garfield started so quickly, they forgot to let go off RS Mr. Conductor. Garfield's chance had come.

Garfield: "Come on, come on!"

Narrator: "Puffed Garfield to the flowers.

The line went faster and faster, too fast for RS Mr. Conductor. He wanted to stop, but he couldn't!"

RS Mr. Conductor: "Peep, peep, stop, stop!"

Garfield: "Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "Laughed Garfield."

Flowers: "You can't get away, you can't get away!"

Narrator: "Laughed the flowers.

Poor RS Mr. Conductor was going faster than he had ever gone before. He was out of breath, and his feet hurt him, but he had to go on."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I shall never be the same again."

Narrator: "He thought sadly."

RS Mr. Conductor: "My feet will be quite worn out."

Narrator: "At last, they stopped at a station.

RS Mr. Conductor let go, and he felt very silly and exhausted.

Next, he sat on a turntable, thinking of everyone laughing at him.

And then he ran onto a siding, out of the way."

Garfield: "Well, little RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "Chuckled Garfield."

Garfield: "Now you know what hard work means, don't you?"

Narrator: "Poor RS Mr. Conductor couldn't answer. He had no breath. He just puffed slowly away to rest, and had a long, long drink.

He went home very slowly, and was careful afterwards never to be cheeky to Garfield again."

Edd and Garfield

Narrator: "One day, Edd was in the house where he lived with the other TV Characters. They were all bigger than Edd and boasted about it."

Garfield: "The driver won't choose you again."

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "He wants strong TV Characters like us."

Narrator: "But the driver and fireman felt sorry for Edd."

Driver and Fireman: "Would you like to come out today?"

Edd: "Oh, yes, please!"

Narrator: "Said Edd. So he had his breakfast, gained lots of stamina, and Edd puffed away.

The other TV Characters were very cross at being left behind.

Edd worked hard all day. The flowers thought he was very kind and the driver was very pleased."

Edd: "I'm going out again tomorrow."

Narrator: "Edd told the other TV Characters that night."

Edd: "What do you think of that?"

Narrator: "But he didn't hear what they thought, for he was so tired and happy, that he fell asleep at once.

Next morning, Edd woke up to find nothing had changed. Garfield was still boasting."

Garfield: "You watch me, little Edd, as I rush through with the express. That will be a splendid sight for you.

Good-bye, little Edd. Look out for me this afternoon."

Narrator: "Edd went off to do some arranging.

Edd liked arranging. It was fun playing with goombas. He would come up quietly and give them a push. Then he would stop and the silly goombas would go bump into each other.

Goombas: "Oh!"

Narrator: "They cried."

Goombas: "Whatever is happening?"

Narrator: "Edd played until there were no more goombas. Then he stopped to rest.

Presently, he heard some grumbling.

Garfield was very cross. Instead of nice, shining flowers, he was taking some dirty goombas."

Garfield: "Goombas, goombas, goombas!"

Narrator: "He grumbled."

Garfield: "The shame of it, the shame of it, oh, the shame of it!"

Narrator: "Edd laughed, and went to find some more goombas.

Then there was trouble."

Porter: "Garfield can't get up the hill."

Narrator: "The porter called to Edd's driver."

Porter: "Will you take Edd and push him, please?"

Narrator: "They found Garfield halfway up, and very cross. His driver and fireman were talking to him severely."

Garfield's Driver and Fireman: "You're not trying!"

Garfield: "I can't do it!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "The noisy goombas hold a cat back so."

Narrator: "Edd's driver came up."

Edd's Driver: "We've come to push."

Garfield: "No use at all!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Edd's Driver: "You wait and see."

Narrator: "Replied Edd's driver.

They brought the goombas back to the bottom of the hill."

Edd: "I'm ready!"

Narrator: "Said Edd."

Garfield: "No good."

Narrator: "Grumbled Garfield. They pulled and pushed as hard as they could."

Garfield: "I can't do it! I can't do it! I can't do it!"

Narrator: "Puffed Garfield."

Edd: "I will do it, I will do it, I will do it!"

Narrator: "Puffed Edd. Edd pushed and puffed, and puffed and pushed as hard as ever he could. And almost before he realized it, Garfield found himself at the top of the hill."

Garfield: "I've done it, I've done it, I've done it!"

Narrator: "He said proudly. He forgot all about Edd and didn't wait to say 'Thank you'.

Edd was left out of breath and far behind. He ran onto the next station, and there he found that the driver and fireman were very pleased with him. The fireman gave him a nice long drink, and the driver said,"

Edd's Driver: "I'll get out my clothes tomorrow, and give you a beautiful red shirt and purple shorts. Then you'll be the smartest TV Character in the house."

The Sad Story of Homer

Narrator: "Once a man taking some flowers was afraid of a few drops of rain. It went into a tunnel and squeaked through its head and wouldn't come out again.

The man's name is Homer. His driver and fireman argued with him, but he would not move."

Homer: "The rain will spoil my lovely white shirt and blue pants."

Narrator: "He said. The guard blew his whistle till he had no more breath and waved his flag till his arms ached. But Homer still stayed in the tunnel and kicked dirt at him."

Homer: "I'm not going to spoil my lovely white shirt and blue pants for you."

Narrator: "Then, along came Mayor Adam West, the man in charged of all the TV Characters in TV Land."

Mayor Adam West: "We will pull you out."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West. But Homer only kicked dirt at him."

Narrator: "Everyone pull except Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "Because, (cough)"

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "My doctor had forbidden me to pull."

Narrator: "But still Homer stayed in the tunnel.

Then they tried pushing from the other end. Mayor West said,"

Mayor Adam West: "One, two, three, push!"

Narrator: "But he didn't help."

Mayor Adam West: "(cough) My doctor has forbidden me to push."

Narrator: "He said. They pushed and pushed and pushed. But still Homer stayed in the tunnel.

At last, RS Mr. Conductor came along. The guard waved his red flag and stopped him. Everyone argued with Homer."

Passengers: "Look, it has stopped raining."

Narrator: "They said."

Homer: "Yes, but it will begin again soon."

Narrator: "Said Homer."

Homer: "And what would become of my white shirt and blue pants then?"

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor pushed and puffed, and pushed as hard as ever he could. But still Homer stayed in the tunnel.

Eventually, even Mayor West gave up."

Mayor Adam West: "We shall take away your road."

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "And leave you here for always and always and always."

Narrator: "They took up the old road and built a wall in front of him so Homer couldn't get out of the tunnel anymore.

All he could do was to watch the TV Characters rushing through the other tunnel. He was very sad because he thought no one would ever see his lovely white shirt and blue pants again. As time went on, Edd and Garfield would often pass by. Edd would say,"

Edd: "Hello."

Narrator: "And Garfield would say,"

Garfield: "Serves you right!"

Narrator: "Poor Homer had no strength to answer. His stamina had gone low. Soot and dirt from the tunnel spoiled his lovely white shirt and blue pants anyway. He wondered if he would ever be allowed to take flowers again. But I think he deserved his punishment, don't you?"

Edd, Garfield and Homer

Narrator: "Garfield always took the express flowers. He was proud of being the only TV Character strong enough to do so. It was full of important people, like Mayor Adam West, and Garfield was seeing how fast he could go."

Garfield: "Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "He said."

Flowers: "Trickety-trock, trickety-trock, trickety-trock."

Narrator: "Said the flowers. In a minute, Garfield would see the tunnel where Homer stood bricked up and lonely."

Homer: "Oh dear."

Narrator: "Thought Homer."

Homer: "Why did I worry about rain spoiling my lovely clothes? Will Mayor West ever forgive me and let me out again?"

Garfield: "I'm going to whistle at Homer."

Narrator: "Said Garfield. He was almost there when... (Wheeshing sound), and there was Garfield going slower and slower in a cloud of dust. His driver stopped him."

Garfield: "What has happened to me?"

Narrator: "Asked Garfield."

Garfield: "I feel so weak."

Garfield's Driver: "You've pulled a muscle."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

Garfield's Driver: "You can't take the flowers anymore."

Garfield: "Oh dear."

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "We were going so nicely too. And look, there's Homer laughing at me."

Narrator: "Everyone came to see Garfield."

Mayor Adam West: "Humph!"

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "I never liked these big TV Characters, always going wrong. Send for another TV Character at once."

Narrator: "While the guard went to find one, they brought Garfield in a siding out of the way.

Edd was the only TV Character left."

Edd: "I'll come and try."

Narrator: "He said."

Garfield: "Pooh!"

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "That's no use. Edd can't push the flowers."

Narrator: "Edd puffed and pushed and pushed and puffed, but he couldn't move the heavy flowers."

Garfield: "I told you so."

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "Why not let Homer try?"

Mayor Adam West: "Yes."

Narrator: "Said Mayor Adam West."

Mayor Adam West: "I will.

Will you help take the flowers, Homer?"

Narrator: "He asked."

Homer: "Oh yes."

Narrator: "Said Homer.

When Homer had got up strength, he puffed out. He was dirty and covered with cobwebs."

Homer: "Ooh! I'm stiff, I'm stiff."

Narrator: "He groaned."

Mayor Adam West: "Have a run to ease your legs, and find a turntable."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West.

When Homer came back, he felt much better. Then they hooked him up."

Edd: "Peep, peep."

Narrator: "Said Edd."

Edd: "I'm ready."

Homer: "Peep, peep, peep."

Narrator: "Said Homer."

Homer: "So am I."

Edd and Homer: "Pull hard. We'll do it. Pull hard. We'll do it."

Narrator: "They puffed together."

Edd and Homer: "We've done it together. We've done it together."

Narrator: "Said Edd and Homer."

Flowers: "You've done it, hurray! You've done it, hurray!"

Narrator: "Sang the flowers. Everyone was excited. Mayor West leaned out to wave at Edd and Homer, but they were going so fast that his hat blew off into a field where a goat ate it for tea.

They never stopped till they came to the station at the end of the path. The passengers all said "Thank you". And Mayor West promised Homer some new clothes.

On their way home, Edd and Homer helped Garfield back to the house. All three TV Characters are now great friends. Homer doesn't mind the rain now. He knows that the best way to keep his clothes nice is not to run into tunnels but to ask his driver to wash him when the day's work is over."

RS Mr. Conductor's Flowers

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor was grumbling to the other TV Characters."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I spend my time pulling flowers about, ready for you to take out on journeys."

Narrator: "The other TV characters laughed."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Why can't I take passengers, too?"

Garfield: "You're too impatient."

Narrator: "They said."

Garfield: "You'd be sure to leave something behind."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Rubbish!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'll show you."

Narrator: "One night, he and Homer were alone. Homer was ill. The men worked hard, but he didn't get better.

He felt just as bad next morning. Homer usually took the first passengers, and RS Mr. Conductor had to get his flowers ready."

RS Mr. Conductor: "If Homer is ill,"

Narrator: "He thought."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Perhaps I shall take his flowers."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor ran to find the flowers."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Come along, come along!"

Narrator: "He fussed."

Flowers: "There's plenty of time, there's plenty of time."

Narrator: "They grumbled.

RS Mr. Conductor took them to the platform, and wanted to run around in front at once.

But his driver wouldn't let him."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Don't be impatient, RS Mr. Conductor!"

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor waited and waited.

People got on board, the guard and stationmaster walked up and down, the porter secured the plants, and still, Homer didn't come. RS Mr. Conductor got more and more excited.

Mayor Adam West came to see what was the matter, and the guard and the stationmaster told him about Homer."

Mayor Adam West: "Find another TV Character."

Narrator: "He ordered."

Guard and Stationmaster: "There's only RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "They said."

Mayor Adam West: "You'll have to do it then, RS Mr. Conductor. Be quick now."

Narrator: "So RS Mr. Conductor ran round in front and backed down onto the flowers ready to start."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Don't be impatient, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Wait till everything is ready."

Narrator: "But RS Mr. Conductor was too excited to listen.

What happened then, nobody knows. Perhaps the first flower forgot to grab RS Mr. Conductor, or perhaps RS Mr. Conductor was given the signal by mistake. Anyhow, RS Mr. Conductor started. As they passed the first signal tower, men waved and shouted, but he didn't stop."

RS Mr. Conductor: "They're waving because I'm such a splendid conductor."

Narrator: "He thought importantly."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Homer says it's hard to pull flowers, but I think it's easy.

Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "He puffed, pretending to be like Garfield."

RS Mr. Conductor: "People have never seen me taking passengers before. It's nice of them to wave."

Narrator: "And he whistled."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Thank you."

Narrator: "Then he came to a signal at 'Danger'."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Bother!"

Narrator: "He said."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I must stop, and I was going so nicely, too! What a nuisance signals are."

Narrator: "He blew an angry whistle.

The signalman ran up."

Signalman: "Hello, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "He said."

Signalman: "What are you doing here?"

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm pulling flowers."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Can't you see?"

Signalman: "Where are your flowers, then?"

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor looked back."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Why, bless me!"

Narrator: "He said."

RS Mr. Conductor: "If we haven't left them behind!"

Signalman: "Yes."

Narrator: "Said the signalman."

Signalman: "You'd better go back quickly and fetch them."

Narrator: "Poor RS Mr. Conductor was so sad, he nearly cried.

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Cheer up."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Let's go back quickly and try again."

Narrator: "At the station, all the passengers were talking at once. They were telling Mayor West what a bad place TV Land was. But when RS Mr. Conductor came back, they saw how sad he was, and couldn't be cross.

He held on to the flowers, and this time he really pulled them.

But for a long time afterwards, the other TV Characters laughed at RS Mr. Conductor and said,"

Homer and Schemer: "Look, there's RS Mr. Conductor, who wanted to take some passengers, but forgot about the flowers!"

RS Mr. Conductor and the Goombas

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor wouldn't stop being a nuisance. Night after night, he kept the other TV Characters awake."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm tired of pushing flowers. I want to see the world."

Narrator: "The other TV Characters didn't take much notice, for RS Mr. Conductor was a little conductor with a long tongue.

But one night, Edd came to the house. He was a kind kid and felt sorry for RS Mr. Conductor."

Edd: "I've got some goombas to take home tomorrow. If you take them instead of me, I'll push flowers in the yard."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Thank you."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "That will be nice."

Narrator: "Next morning, Edd and RS Mr. Conductor asked their drivers, and when they said "Yes", RS Mr. Conductor ran off happily to find goombas.

Now, goombas are silly and noisy. They talk a lot and don't attend to what they are doing. And I'm sorry to say, they play tricks on a TV Character who is not used to them. Edd knew all about goombas. He warned RS Mr. Conductor to be careful, but RS Mr. Conductor was too excited to listen.

The shunter fastened the goombas, and when the signal dropped, RS Mr. Conductor was ready. The guard blew his whistle."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Peep! Peep!"

Narrator: "Answered RS Mr. Conductor, and started off. But the goombas weren't ready."

Goombas: "Oh, oh, oh!"

Narrator: "They screamed."

Goombas: "Wait, RS Mr. Conductor, wait."

Narrator: "But RS Mr. Conductor wouldn't wait."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Come on, come on."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Goombas: "All right, all right, don't fuss, all right, don't fuss."

Narrator: "Grumbled the goombas.

RS Mr. Conductor began going faster and faster."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Wheeeee!"

Narrator: "He whistled as he rushed through Homer's tunnel."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "Called RS Mr. Conductor. He was feeling very proud of himself. But the goombas grew crosser and crosser. At last RS Mr. Conductor slowed down as he came to Garfield's hill."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Steady now, steady."

Narrator: "Warned the driver, as they reached the top. He began to put on the brakes."

RS Mr. Conductor: "We're stopping, we're stopping."

Narrator: "Called RS Mr. Conductor."

Goombas: "No, no, no, no!"

Narrator: "Answered the goombas, bumping into each other."

Goombas: "Go on, go on!"

Narrator: "Before the driver could stop them, they had pushed RS Mr. Conductor down the hill and were rattling and laughing behind him.

Poor RS Mr. Conductor tried hard to stop them from making him go too fast."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Stop pushing, stop pushing!"

Narrator: "He hissed. But the goombas took no notice."

Goombas: "Go on, go on!"

Narrator: "They giggled in their silly way."

RS Mr. Conductor: "There's the station. Oh dear, what shall I do?"

Narrator: "He cried. They rattled straight through and swerved into the goods yard. RS Mr. Conductor shut his eyes."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I must stop!"

Narrator: "When he opened his eyes, he saw he had stopped just in front of the buffers. There watching him was Mayor Adam West."

Mayor Adam West: "What are you doing here, RS Mr. Conductor?"

Narrator: "He asked."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I've brought Edd's goombas."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor answered."

Mayor Adam West: "Why did you come so fast?"

RS Mr. Conductor: "I didn't mean to. I was pushed."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

Mayor Adam West: "You've got a lot to learn about goombas then, little RS Mr. Conductor. After pushing them about here for a few weeks, you'll know almost as much about them as Edd. Then you'll be a Really Useful Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor and the Breakdown Crane

Narrator: "Every day, Mayor Adam West came to the station to see the TV Characters."

Mayor Adam West: "Hello."

Narrator: "He always said to RS Mr. Conductor."

Mayor Adam West: "Remember, don't be impatient, RS Mr. Conductor. You can never be as strong and fast as Garfield, but you can be a really useful conductor. Don't let the silly goombas tease you."

Narrator: "There were lots of goombas, and RS Mr. Conductor worked very hard pushing and pulling them into place. There was also a small trailer and two strange things his driver called cranes."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "That's the breakdown crane."

Narrator: "He told RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "The cranes are for lifting heavy things, like TV Characters, and flowers, and goombas."

Narrator: "One day, RS Mr. Conductor was in the yard. Suddenly, he heard a man screaming."

Schemer: "Help! Help!"

Narrator: "A Man came rushing through, much too fast. The man was Schemer, and he was frightened. His shoes were on fire."

Schemer: "They're pushing me, they're pushing me!"

Narrator: "He panted."

Goombas: "On, on, on!"

Narrator: "Laughed the goombas.

Still screaming,"

Schemer: "Help! Help!"

Narrator: "Poor Schemer disappeared."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'd like to teach those goombas a lesson."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor.

Soon came the alarm."

Signalman: "Schemer's off the path, the breakdown crane, quickly!"

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor grabbed the crane, and off they went.

RS Mr. Conductor worked his hardest."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "He puffed. He wasn't pretending to be like Garfield; he really meant it."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Bother those goombas and their tricks. I hope poor Schemer isn't hurt."

Narrator: "Schemer's driver and fireman were feeling him all over, to see if he was hurt."

Schemer's Driver and Fireman: "Never mind, Schemer."

Narrator: "They said."

Schemer's Driver and Fireman: "It wasn't your fault. It was those shoes they gave you. We always said they were no good."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor pushed the breakdown crane alongside. Then he pulled the unhurt goombas out of the way."

Goombas: "Oh, dear, oh, dear!"

Narrator: "They groaned."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Serves you right, serves you right!"

Narrator: "Puffed RS Mr. Conductor.

He was hard at work, puffing backwards and forwards all day."

RS Mr. Conductor: "This will teach you a lesson. This will teach you a lesson."

Narrator: "He told the goombas.

And they answered,"

Goombas: "Yes it will, yes it will."

Narrator: "They left the broken goombas, then with two cranes, they put Schemer back on the path.

He tried to move, but he couldn't, so RS Mr. Conductor helped him back home.

Mayor West was waiting anxiously for them."

Mayor Adam West: "Well, RS Mr. Conductor,"

Narrator: "He said,"

Mayor Adam West: "I've heard all about it, and I'm very pleased with you. You're a really useful conductor.

Schemer shall have some proper shoes and some new clothes, and you shall have a route all to yourself."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Oh, thank you, sir!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor.

Now RS Mr. Conductor is as happy as can be. He has a route, and two sisters called Patty and Selma. He puffs proudly backwards and forwards with them all day.

He is never lonely. Edd and Homer stop quite often and tell him the news.

Garfield is always in a hurry, but never forgets to whistle to RS Mr. Conductor, and RS Mr. Conductor always whistles in return."

Schemer and the Flowers

Narrator: "Schemer was enjoying his life in TV Land, but he still had a lot to learn."

Mayor Adam West: "You're a special mixed-traffic man."

Narrator: "Said Mayor Adam West."

Mayor Adam West: "You can take flowers and goombas quite easily, but you must learn by your mistakes."

Narrator: "Schemer knew what Mayor West meant. He could well remember that dreadful accident on his first day."

Edd: "Be careful with the flowers, Schemer."

Narrator: "Said Edd."

Edd: "They don't like being bumped."

Narrator: "Everyone came to admire Schemer."

Schemer: "I'm a really splendid man"

Narrator: "He thought, and suddenly danced up a sweat. A shower of sweat fell on Mayor West's nice new top hat.

Just then, the guard blew his whistle, and Schemer thought they had better go."

Schemer: "Go on! Go on!"

Narrator: "He puffed to Edd."

Edd: "Don't push! Don't push!"

Narrator: "Replied Edd. The flowers were grumbling too."

Flowers: "Don't go so fast! Don't go so fast!"

Narrator: "But Schemer didn't listen.

When at last, they stopped at the next station, two flowers were beyond the platform. They had to go back to drop off their passengers. But no one seemed to know about Mayor West's new hat, so Schemer felt happier.

Presently, they came to the station where RS Mr. Conductor was waiting with his two sisters-in-law."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Hello, Schemer."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Feeling better? That's right.

Oh, that's my guard's whistle. I must go. I don't know what Mayor West would do without me to run this path."

Narrator: "And he puffed off importantly.

Edd and Schemer passed the field where Schemer had had his accident. The fence was mended and the cows were back again.

They ended their journey, and rested before setting off for home. Schemer was still wondering what Mayor West would have to say about his new hat.

Next morning, Mayor West spoke severely to him."

Mayor Adam West: "If you can't behave, I shall take away your favorite clothes, and have you wear stripes."

Narrator: "Schemer didn't like that at all.

He was very rough with the grumbling flowers as he brought them to the platform."

Schemer: "Don't talk! Come on!"

Narrator: "He called to them."

Schemer: "Garfield never has to fetch his own flowers,"

Narrator: "He huffed to himself."

Schemer: "And he only wears orange."

Narrator: "To make Schemer even more cross, this time no one came near him."

Schemer: "I'll show them!"

Narrator: "He thought.

Schemer: "They think Garfield is the only TV Character who can take flowers.

Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "Puffed Schemer."

Flowers: "You're going too fast! You're going too fast!"

Narrator: "Replied the flowers. Schemer laughed and tried to go faster, but the flowers wouldn't let him."

Flowers: "We're going to stop."

Narrator: "They said."

Flowers: "We're going to stop!"

Schemer: "What's the matter?"

Narrator: "Schemer asked his driver."

Schemer's Driver: "The flowers are hard on. Leak in the pot most likely. You've banged the flowers enough to make a leak in anything."

Guard: "How should we mend it?"

Narrator: "Said the Guard."

Schemer's Driver: "We'll do it with newspaper and a leather bootlace."

Narrator: "Replied the driver."

Guard: "Well, where is the bootlace coming from?"

Narrator: "Asked the guard."

Schemer's Driver: "Ask the passengers."

Narrator: "Said the driver."

Guard: "You have leather bootlace there, I see, sir."

Narrator: "Said the guard to Eustace Bagge, a smarty dressed man."

Guard: "Please give it to me."

Eustace Bagge: "I won't!"

Narrator: "Said Eustace."

Guard: "Then,"

Narrator: "Said the guard,"

Guard: "I'm afraid we'll all have to stay where we are."

Narrator: "The passengers all said what a bad land it was. Then they told Eustace how bad he was instead. Everyone was very cross.

At last, he handed his laces over.

The driver tied a pad of newspaper tightly around the hole in the pot, and Schemer was able to take the flowers.

But he was a sadder and wiser Schemer, and took care never to bump flowers again."

Troublesome Goombas

Narrator: "Schemer had not seen Mayor Adam West for several days. He was left alone for being naughty and was not even allowed out to work with flowers or goombas in the yard."

Schemer: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "He thought."

Schemer: "I shall have to stay in here for always and no one will see my splendid clothes again all because I went so fast that I made a hole in one of my flowers that had to be mended with, of all things, a passenger's bootlace."

Narrator: "At last, Mayor West arrived."

Mayor Adam West: "I see you are sorry, Schemer."

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "I hope now you will be a better man. You have given me a lot of trouble. People are laughing at my land and I don't like that at all."

Schemer: "I'm very sorry, sir."

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Schemer: "I will try hard to behave."

Mayor Adam West: "That's a good man."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "I want you to take some goombas for me."

Narrator: "Schemer was delighted and puffed away."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Here are your goombas, Schemer."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Have you got some bootlaces ready?"

Narrator: "And he ran off laughing."

Goombas: "Uh-oh! Oh!"

Narrator: "Said the goombas."

Goombas: "We want a proper TV Character. Not a big monster."

Narrator: "Schemer took no notice and started as soon as the guard was ready."

Schemer: "Come along, come along."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Goombas: "We won't, we won't!"

Narrator: "Screamed the goombas. But Schemer didn't care and pull the screeching goombas sternly out of the station.

The goombas tried hard to make him give up, but he still kept on. Sometimes, they'd come to a standstill. And sometimes their feet would run hot. And each time, the trouble had to be put right. And each time, Schemer would start again determined not to let them beat him."

Goombas: "Give up, give up! You can't pull us! You can't, you can't!"

Narrator: "Called the goombas."

Schemer: "I can and I will! I can and I will!"

Narrator: "Puffed Schemer. Slowly but surely, he pulled them along the path.

At last they saw Garfield's Hill."

Schemer's Driver: "Look out for trouble, Schemer."

Narrator: "Warned his driver."

Schemer's Driver: "We'll go fast and get them up before they know it. Don't let them stop you."

Narrator: "So Schemer went faster and soon they were half way up."

Schemer: "I'm doing it, I'm doing it!"

Narrator: "He panted."

Schemer: "Will the top never come?"

Narrator: "Then, with a sudden jerk, it all came easier."

Schemer: "I've done it, I've done it!"

Narrator: "He puffed."

Schemer: "Hooray! It's easy now."

Narrator: "But he driver shut off steam."

Schemer's Driver: "They've done it again. We've left our tail behind. Look."

Narrator: "The last goombas were running backwards down the hill. The rope had snapped. But the guard stopped the goombas and got out to warn approaching TV Characters."

Schemer: "That's why it was easy."

Narrator: "Said Schemer, as he back the other goombas carefully down."

Schemer: "What silly things goombas are! There might had been an accident."

Edd: "Shall I help you, Schemer?"

Narrator: "Called Edd."

Schemer: "No, thank you."

Narrator: "Answered Schemer."

Schemer: "I'll pull them myself."

Edd: "Good. Don't let them beat you. You're doing well."

Narrator: "Whistled Edd, as Schemer slowly struggled up the hill."

Schemer: "I can do it, I can do it!"

Narrator: "He puffed. He pulled and puffed as hard as he could."

Schemer: "I've done it, I've done it!"

Narrator: "He panted.

They reach the station safely and Schemer was resting when Edd pulled up."

Edd: "Peep, peep!"

Narrator: "He whistled. Then, Schemer saw Mayor West."

Schemer: "Oh dear! What will he say?"

Narrator: "He asked himself.

But Mayor West was smiling."

Mayor Adam West: "I was with Edd and I saw everything."

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "You made the most troublesome goombas on the path behave. After that, you deserve to keep your favorite clothes."

Schemer and the Express

Narrator: "One night, Homer and Garfield were alone with Schemer. Although Mayor Adam West was beginning to think well of him, whenever a chance came, the other TV Characters would talk of nothing but bootlaces."

Homer and Garfield: "Remember the time one had to be used to get you out of trouble, Schemer?"

Narrator: "They would tease. Schemer tried to get his own back by talking about TV Characters who got shut up in tunnels and stuck on hills, but they wouldn't listen."

Garfield: "You talk too much little Schemer."

Narrator: "Said Garfield."

Garfield: "A fine strong cat like me has something to talk about. I'm the only TV Character who can take the express flowers. When I'm not there, they need two TV Characters. Think of that? I've taken express flowers for years and have never once lost my way. I seem to know the right path by instinct."

Narrator: "Every wise TV Character knows of course that the signalman makes the TV Characters run on the right path, but Garfield was so proud, he had forgotten."

Garfield: "Wake up, Schemer."

Narrator: "Said Garfield next morning."

Garfield: "It's nearly time for the express. What are you doing? Odd jobs? Ah well, we all have to begin somewhere, don't we? Run along and get my flowers. Don't be late."

Narrator: "Schemer went to fetch Garfield's flowers. They were all shiny with new petals. He was careful not to bump them, and they follow him smoothly into the station, singing happily,"

Flowers: "We're going away, we're going away."

Schemer: "I wish I was going with you."

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Schemer: "I should love to take the express and go flying along the path."

Narrator: "Garfield, with much noise, got ready to back down onto the line.

Mayor West was with the flowers with other important people. And as soon so they heard the guard's whistle, Garfield started."

Garfield: "Look at me now, look at me now."

Narrator: "He puffed, as the flowers glided after him."

Garfield: "Goodbye little Schemer. See you tomorrow."

Narrator: "Schemer watch the line disappear and then went back to work. He pushed some goombas into their proper sidings, and went to fetch the flowers for another TV Character.

Schemer had just brought the flowers to the platform when he heard a mournful noise.

There was Garfield trying to sidle into the station without being noticed."

Schemer: "Hello, Garfield. Is it tomorrow?"

Narrator: "Asked Schemer. Garfield didn't answer, he just kicked at the ground feebly."

Schemer: "Did you lose your way, Garfield?"

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Garfield: "No, it was lost for me. I turned off the main path and onto the loop. I had to go all around and back again."

Schemer: "Perhaps it was instinct."

Narrator: "Said Schemer.

Meanwhile, all the passengers hurried to the booking office."

Passengers: "We want our money back!"

Narrator: "They shouted. But Mayor West climbed onto a trolley, and blew the guard's whistle so loudly that they all stopped to look at him. Then he promised them a new TV Character at once."

Mayor Adam West: "Garfield can't do it. Will you take it for us, Schemer?"

Schemer: "Yes, sir. I'll try."

Narrator: "So Schemer was hooked up, and everyone got on."

Mayor Adam West: "Do your best, Schemer."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Schemer: "Come along, come along."

Narrator: "Said Schemer."

Flowers: "You're pulling us well, you're pulling us well."

Narrator: "Sang the flowers.

Bridges and stations flashed by, the passengers cheered and they soon reached the station. Everyone said 'Thank you' to Schemer, and Mayor West was very impressed."

Mayor Adam West: "Well done!"

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "Would you like to take the express sometimes?"

Schemer: "Yes, please!"

Narrator: "Answered Schemer.

Next day, when Schemer came by, Garfield was pushing goombas."

Garfield: "I like some quiet work for a change."

Narrator: "He said."

Garfield: "I'm teaching these goombas manners. You did well with those flowers I hear. Good, we'll show them."

Narrator: "And he gave his goombas a bump.

Schemer and Garfield are now good friends. Schemer sometimes takes the express to give Garfield a rest. Garfield never talks about bootlaces, and they are both quite agreed on the subject of goombas."

RS Mr. Conductor and the Guard

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor is very proud of his route. He thinks it's the most important part of TV Land. His two sisters-in-law, Patty and Selma agree with him.

Patty can only take passengers, but Selma can take passengers, luggage and the guard. They are both old need new clothes, but RS Mr. Conductor loves them very much.

As they run backwards and forwards along the path, they sing songs to each other. When RS Mr. Conductor starts from a station, he sings,"

RS Mr. Conductor: "Oh, come along, we're rather late, oh, come along, we're rather late."

Narrator: "And the sisters-in-law sing,"

Patty and Selma: "We're coming along, we're coming along."

Narrator: "They don't mind what RS Mr. Conductor sings to them because they know he is trying to please Mayor Adam West. And they know too that if RS Mr. Conductor is cross, he's not cross with them.

One day, they had to wait for Homer's passengers, which made RS Mr. Conductor very cross."

RS Mr. Conductor: "How can I run my route properly if Homer's always late? He doesn't realize that Mayor West depends on me."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor whistled impatiently. He wanted to leave, but he had to wait for Homer's passengers.

At last, Homer came."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Where have been lazybones?"

Narrator: "Asked RS Mr. Conductor."

Homer: "Oh dear, my body is out of order. No one understands my case. You don't know what I suffer."

Narrator: "Moaned Homer."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Rubbish!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "You're too fat! You need exercise!"

Narrator: "The guard blew his whistle, and RS Mr. Conductor started so quickly that he left him behind. The guard waved his red flag to stop RS Mr. Conductor, but he was well on his way hurrying out of the station."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Come along, come along."

Narrator: "Puffed RS Mr. Conductor. But Selma didn't want to come."

Selma: "I've lost my nice guard, I've lost my nice guard."

Narrator: "She sobbed.

Patty tried to tell RS Mr. Conductor what had happened."

Patty: "We haven't a guard, we haven't a guard!"

Narrator: "But he was hurrying and wouldn't listen. Patty and Selma tried to stop, but they couldn't without the guard."

Patty and Selma: "Where is our guard? Where is our guard?"

Narrator: "They cried. But RS Mr. Conductor didn't stop till they came to a signal."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Bother that signal!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "What's the matter?"

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "I don't know."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "The guard will tell us in a minute."

Narrator: "They waited and waited, but the guard didn't come."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Peep, peep, peep! Where is the guard?"

Narrator: "Whistled RS Mr. Conductor."

Patty and Selma: "We've left him behind."

Narrator: "Sobbed Patty and Selma together.

Everyone looked, and there was the guard running as fast as he could along the path with his flags in one hand and his whistle in the other. He was very hot. So he had a drink, and told them all about it."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm very sorry, Mr. Guard."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

Guard: "It wasn't your fault, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "He replied."

Guard: "Look, the signal is down. We can go. Let's make up for lost time."

Narrator: "Patty and Selma were so pleased to have their guard again that they sang,"

Patty and Selma: "As fast as you like, as fast as you like."

Narrator: "To RS Mr. Conductor all the way.

They reached the end of the route quicker than ever before."

RS Mr. Conductor Goes Fishing

Narrator: "When RS Mr. Conductor walked along his path, he always looked forward to something special...the sight of the river. As he rumbled over he bridge, he would see people fishing. RS Mr. Conductor often wanted to stay and watch. But his driver said,"

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "No. What would Mayor Adam West say if we were late?"

Narrator: "Every time he met another TV Character, he would say,"

RS Mr. Conductor: "I want to fish."

Narrator: "But they all had the same answer."

Schemer: "Conductors don't go fishing."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Silly stick-in-the-muds."

Narrator: "Thought RS Mr. Conductor.

One day he stopped as usual to get a drink of water at the station by the river."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Out of order! Bother!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm thirsty."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Never mind."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "We'll get some water from the river."

Narrator: "They found a bucket and some rope, and went to the bridge.

Then the driver let the bucket down to the water. The bucket was old and had five holes. So they had to fill it, pull it up and give it to RS Mr. Conductor as quickly as they could several times over.

They finished at last."

RS Mr. Conductor: "That's good. That's good."

Narrator: "Puffed RS Mr. Conductor. And Patty and Selma ran happily behind.

Suddenly RS Mr. Conductor began to feel a pain in his body. Gold dust began to come from him in an alarming way."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "There's too much gold dust."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "Groaned RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm going to burst! I'm going to burst!"

Narrator: "They fanned away the gold dust and struggled on."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I've got such a pain. I've got such a pain."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor hissed.

They stopped just outside the last station, unhooked Patty and Selma, and ran RS Mr. Conductor, who was still hissing fit to burst, on a siding right out of the way.

Then, while the guard telephoned for a conductor inspector, the driver found notices in large letter which he hung on RS Mr. Conductor in front and behind.

DANGER. KEEP AWAY.

Soon Principal Skinner and Mayor West arrived."

Mayor Adam West and Principal Skinner: "Cheer up, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "They said."

Mayor Adam West and Principal Skinner: "We'll soon put you right."

Narrator: "The driver told them what had happened."

Principal Skinner: "So his stomach is too full."

Narrator: "Said Skinner."

Principal Skinner: "I'll just look inside."

Narrator: "He peered inside. Then he turned to Mayor West."

Principal Skinner: "Excuse me, sir. Please look inside and tell me what you see."

Mayor Adam West: "Certainly, Skinner."

Narrator: "Replied Mayor West. He looked in and nearly fell down in surprise."

Mayor Adam West: "Skinner,"

Narrator: "He whispered."

Mayor Adam West: "Can you see fish?

Gracious goodness me. How did the fish get there, driver?"

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "We must have fished them from the river with our bucket."

Narrator: "Replied RS Mr. Conductor's driver."

Mayor Adam West: "Well, RS Mr. Conductor. So you and your driver have been fishing. But fish don't suit you. We must get them out."

Narrator: "They all took turns at fishing in RS Mr. Conductor while Mayor West looked on and told them how to do it. When they had caught all the fish, they had a lovely picnic supper of fish and chips."

Mayor Adam West: "Hmmm. That was good."

Narrator: "Said Mayor West."

Mayor Adam West: "But fish don't suit you, RS Mr. Conductor. So you mustn't do it again."

RS Mr. Conductor: "No sir, I won't."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor sadly."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Conductors don't go fishing. It's too uncomfortable."

RS Mr. Conductor, Scooby Doo and the Snow

Narrator: "Autumn had come to TV Land. The fields were changing from yellow stubble to brown earth, and a dog was hard at work as RS Mr. Conductor puffed along.

Later, RS Mr. Conductor saw the dog close by."

Scooby Doo: "Hello."

Narrator: "Said the dog."

Scooby Doo: "I'm Scooby Doo. I'm plowing."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm RS Mr. Conductor. My sisters-in-law and I are taking passengers. What ugly feet you've got."

Scooby Doo: "They're not ugly! They're paws."

Narrator: "Said Scooby Doo."

Scooby Doo: "I can go anywhere. I don't need the road."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I don't want to go anywhere."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I like my road, thank you."

Narrator: "Winter came with dark clouds full of snow."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "I don't like it."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor's Driver."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "A heavy fall is coming. I hope it doesn't stop us."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Puh!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Soft stuff. Nothing to it."

Narrator: "And he puffed on, feeling cold but confident.

They finished their journey safely, but by now, the country was covered."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "You'll need your snow boots for the next journey, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Puh! Snow is silly soft stuff. It won't stop me."

Narrator: "The snow boots were heavy and uncomfortable and made RS Mr. Conductor cross. He shook them, and he banged them, and when he got back, they were so damaged that the driver had to take them off."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "You're a very naughty conductor!"

Narrator: "He said to RS Mr. Conductor.

Next morning, RS Mr. Conductor's driver and fireman came early, and worked hard to mend the snow boots, but they couldn't make them fit.

RS Mr. Conductor was pleased."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I shan't have to wear them! I shan't have to wear them!"

Narrator: "He puffed to Patty and Selma. But they were rather worried."

Patty and Selma: "I hope it's all right. I hope it's all right."

Narrator: "They whispered to each other.

The driver was worried, too."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "It's not bad here,"

Narrator: "He said to the fireman."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "But it's sure to be deep in the valley!"

RS Mr. Conductor: "Silly soft stuff."

Narrator: "Puffed RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I didn't need those stupid things yesterday, and I shan't today. Snow can't stop me!"

Narrator: "He rushed into a tunnel, thinking how clever he was, but there was trouble ahead."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Gold dust and whistles!"

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'm stuck!"

Narrator: "And he was.

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "Back, RS Mr. Conductor, back!"

Narrator: "Said his driver.

RS Mr. Conductor tried, but his feet spun and he couldn't move.

The guard went back for help, while everyone else tried to dig the snow away. But as fast as they dug, more snow slid down until RS Mr. Conductor was nearly buried."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Oh my legs and hands! I shall have to stop here till' I'm frozen. What a silly conductor I am!"

Narrator: "And RS Mr. Conductor began to cry.

At last, a tug came to rescue the passengers, and then, who should come to RS Mr. Conductor's rescue but Scooby Doo! Snow never worries him.

He pulled the sisters-in-law away, then came back for RS Mr. Conductor.

RS Mr. Conductor's feet were clear, but still spun when he tried to move.

Scooby Doo tugged and slipped and slipped and tugged, and at last dragged RS Mr. Conductor clear of the snow, ready for the journey home."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Thank you, Scooby Doo. Your paws are splendid."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor's Driver: "I hope you'll be sensible now, RS Mr. Conductor."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

RS Mr. Conductor: "I'll try."

Narrator: "Said RS Mr. Conductor, and he puffed humbly away."

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