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Cast

  • Big Bird as Kermit the Frog
  • Sherry Netherland as Nadya
  • Lefty the Salesman as The Prison King
  • Lefty's Boss as Big Papa
  • Benny as The Great Escapo
  • Lefty and Benny's Boss as Prisoner One
  • Grundgetta as Miss Poogy
  • Pino as Big Mean Carl
  • Professor Hastings as Pops
  • Harvey Monster as Angel Marie
  • Rocky as Black Dog
  • Aristotle as Blind Pew
  • Bruce Monster as Calico
  • Kermit the Forg as One-Eyed Jack
  • Zostic as Spotted Dick
  • Clancy as Walleye Pike
  • Uncle Talbot as Danny Trejo
  • Placido Flamingo as Josh Groban
  • Abby Cadabby's Pet, The City Mouse, The Country Mouse, Elmo Mouse, Marissa, Tito, J.P., The Mouse King, Royal Guards, Mousey and Mr. Can You Guess' Mouse as Rats
  • Grouches as Frackles
  • Anything Muppets as Humans
  • Wodehouse as Ivan

Lyrics

Sherry Netherland (spoken): Hit it boys
(singing) This is Russia’s premier state funded hotel
We’re very proud of our eclectic clientele
Excellence in service since 1932
Don’t believe what you read in the online reviews

It’s the Big House
The perfect getaway
Welcome into the Big House
You’ll never get away
It’s no Hilton or no Hyatt
But you will have a riot
So please enjoy your stay

Here’s the dining room, the menu is minimal
What the cook does to the food is criminal
Pull up a seat frog, grab yourself a stool
May I recommend you try our famous gruel

In the Big House
You’ll never be alone
Life ain’t bad in the Big House
No, froggy, no
Check out after ten
Or eleven years
Make yourself at home

Accommodation is far superior
Than anything else you will find in Siberia
Let me know if there’s anything you need
Everything is free, money back guaranteed


Placido Flamingo: In the Big House, you will not survive
When you arrive in the Big House, run for your life!


Sherry Netherland: It’s the Big House
The perfect getaway
Welcome into the Big House
You’ll never get away
For your security
I’ll keep the only key
Now please enjoy your stay

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