Shining Time Station/Thomas Parody 1: RS Mr. Conductor Gets Tricked

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  • RS Mr. Conductor as Thomas
  • Billy Twofeathers as Gordon
  • Orson (from Garfield & Friends) as Thomas' Driver
  • Mario (from Mario) as Thomas' Fireman
  • Barton Winslow as Henry (Cameo)
  • Schemer as James (Cameo)
  • Ringo Starr as The Narrator


  • Ringo Starr: RS Mr. Conductor is a conductor who lives in a little signalhouse in Shining Time Station. He's a cheeky little conductor with two small legs, a little blue hat, a little blue suit and a whistle. He's a fussy little conductor too. Always moving carts about ready for the big people to take on long journies. And when they come in, He pulls the carts away so that the big people can go on rest. RS Mr. Conductor thinks no one works as hard as he does. He loves playing tricks on them. Including Billy Twofeathers, the biggest and proudest man of all. RS Mr. Conductor likes to blow his whistle rudely at him.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Wake up, lazybones! Why don't you work hard like me.
  • Ringo Starr: One day, after drivering a big train, Billy arrived back at the station very tired. He was just going to sleep when RS Mr. Conductor came up in his cheeky way.
  • (RS Mr. Conductor pulls his whistle)
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Wake up, lazybones! Do some hard work for change! You can't catch me!
  • Ringo Starr: And off he ran laughing. Instead of going to sleep again, Billy thought how he could get back at RS Mr. Conductor. One morning, RS Mr. Conductor wouldn't wake. Orson and Mario couldn't make him start. There was not enough energy. It was nearly time the express. People were waiting, but the coaches and carts weren't ready. At last, RS Mr. Conductor started.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Oh dear! Oh dear!
  • Ringo Starr: He yarned. He fussed onto the platform where Billy was waiting.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Hurry up you!
  • Ringo Starr: Said Billy.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Hurry yourself!
  • Ringo Starr: Replaid RS Mr. Conductor. Billy began making his plan.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Yes.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Billy.
  • Billy Twofeathers: I will.
  • Ringo Starr: And almost the carts were on board. Billy got into the engine and was ready.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Get in quickly please.
  • Ringo Starr: He said. RS Mr. Conductor usual pushed behind the trains to help them start. But he always got out first. This time, they started so quickly that they forgot to let him out. Billy's chance had come.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Come on, come on.
  • Ringo Starr: Said Billy to the coaches. They went faster and faster. Too fast for RS Mr. Conductor. He wanted to stop, but he couldn't.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Stop! Stop!
  • Billy Twofeathers: Hurry, hurry, hurry!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed Billy.
  • Coaches: You can't get away! You can't get away!
  • Ringo Starr: Laughed the coaches. Poor RS Mr. Conductor was going faster than he had ever gone before. He was out of breath and legs hurt, but he to go on.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: I shall never be the same again.
  • Ringo Starr: He said sadly.
  • RS Mr. Conductor: Me legs shall be quite worned out.
  • Ringo Starr: At last, they stopped at a station. RS Mr. Conductor was let out. And he felt very silly and tired. Next, he went onto a turntable thinking of everyone laughing at him. And then he went out of the way.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Well little RS Mr. Conductor.
  • Ringo Starr: Chuckled Billy.
  • Billy Twofeathers: Now you know what hard work means. Don't you?
  • Ringo Starr: Poor RS Mr. Conductor couldn't answer. He had no breath. He just walked slowly away to rest and had long long drink. He went home very slowly and was carful afterwords never to be cheeky to Billy again.

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