Sir Topham Hatt tries to have a good day, but everything goes terribly wrong.

Featured Characters[edit]

  • Sir Topham Hatt
  • Thomas
  • Percy
  • James
  • Gordon
  • Henry
  • Toby
  • Ted
  • Blossom Z
  • Dragon
  • Sir Topham Hatt's Nephew


Day 1[edit]

Day 2

Day 3

  • Sir Topham Hatt: What a beautiful day! {record scratch} Huh?! What's all this?
  • {Cut to the monkeys with phones on their heads. Cut back to Sir Topham Hatt. He stutters and holds his ears.}
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Oh, no! That ringing! My head's gonna explode!
  • Gordon, Henry & James: {shouting} ANSWER IT!!!!!
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {freaking out} I'll call back!
  • Gordon: Here. The call for you, sir. {Sir Topham Hatt does.}
  • Voice on Phone: {sounding like an old woman} Hello?? This a call from Grandma Hung-over! Will you excerpt the charges Hello? Topham-poo?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {yells angrily}
  • Monkeys: You hurt our feelings!
  • James: {yelling to the monkeys} WAIT! He didn't mean you, guys! {Cut back to Sir Topham Hatt.}
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Man... That was more painful than that visit from my nephew.
  • {Flashback: Sir Topham Hatt is feeling angry as an boy with no name is next to him.
  • 'Sir Topham Hatt's Nephew:' Hey, Uncle Topham, where do babies come from?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {now had enough} For the last time, you buy them in a store! Just like everything else! {Cut back to present day.} {relieved} Well, I think that ringing in my ears is gone. {He looks up, a phone is on his head, ringing. He gets very, very angry, shaking and it fell off his head.} THAT'S IT!!! WHO PUT THE PHONE ON MY HEAD, AND I WANNA KNOW WHY!!!!!
  • Gordon: Er, not me! My phone's forwarded to another head!
  • Henry: Not me! My speed number dial's unlisted!
  • James : Yeah! There's no idea I did it! {A cellphone is on his head.} My minutes aren't free on weekends!
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {biffs into James' right side and he goes through the air} IT WAS YOU!!!
  • James: HOW DID HE KNOW?!!?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: What is the meaning of all this?! Is it like, "Going Nuts with Phones Day"?
  • Henry: Um, if we said yes, would it make the situation less awkward?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: What? I don't know- {James lands on him} OWWWW!!!!
  • James: Er, s-sorry, Sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {muffled} James... get... off me... now...

Day 4[edit]

Day 5

  • Sir Topham Hatt: I don't get it! Every time I say "What a beautiful day it is", something bad happens to me. (gasp) Wait a minute, {smiles} maybe if I say the opposite, maybe nothing bad will happen! Yeaaah! I'm gonna give it a try... {Changes his mood into a scrooge.} What a terrible, horrible, no-good, really bad day! {He winks to himself. He hears footsteps in the distance. Sir Topham Hatt screams loudly, when fade to white as hippos run over him.} AHHHH! Not ok! Ow! Ouch! Ow! Oh! Auugghh! {Beeping noise. Pan to Sir Topham Hatt, now on his side, and covered in mud.} Ohhh, please be mud...


  • {We zoom in slowly to Sir Topham Hatt, feeling sorry for himself, and in tears.}
  • Sir Topham Hatt: {sadly} Oh, no! I hadn't felt this unlucky since I went to the hopstal for bladder problems.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Now I know how Jerry Jigglery feels...
  • Toby: Why the wrong face, Sir?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Ohh, Toby, all I wanted was to have I good day, My life has been ruined by Blossom Z's kisses, bird poop, a bunch of phone obsessed morons, a fire-breathing dragon, and I just got run over by a stamping of hippos!
  • Toby: Well, Nice knowing you!
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Oh man! This has been quite a week.

[episode ends]

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