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Ten Cents (from TUGS) as Bertie
Wade (from Garfield & Friends) as Duck
Eric Cartman (from South Park) as Bulgy
Lenny (from The Simpsons) as Oliver
The Coaches as Themselves
Duck's Crew as Themselves
Various Hens as Themselves
Various Passengers as Themselves
Michael Angelis as The Narrator
Michael Angelis: It was a special holiday in Bigg City Port. Ten Cents the tugboat was working harder than ever before. All the TV characters were busy, too. Wade was waiting for his next journey. Near him stood a fat kid with a red coat, but he didn't look friendly like Ten Cents. The kid growled as he gazed at the happy passengers.
Cartman: Stupid nonsense!
Michael Angelis: He grumbled.
Cartman: I wouldn't have brought them if I'd known. I'd have had an injury or something.
Wade: I'm glad you didn't.
Michael Angelis: Smiled Wade.
Wade: You'd have spoiled their fun.
Cartman: Bah. Enjoyment is all you TV characters live for. One day, television will be ripped up!
Michael Angelis: Wade felt shocked at such an idea.
Wade: We have a friend called Ten Cents, and he's a tugboat, but he likes television. Sometimes he teases us about it, but he'd never want to see it ripped up.
Michael Angelis: Growled the kid.
Cartman: I know Ten Cents. He's too small in size to be of any use.
Michael Angelis: Wade took no notice.
Wade: That kid is silly.
Michael Angelis: He thought, as he steamed away. At the junction, Wade told Lenny all about him.
Lenny: I call him Cartman!
Michael Angelis: Chuckled Lenny, then he puffed happily away. But that afternoon, when the two characters met again, Lenny was no longer laughing.
Lenny: Cartman's friend has come.
Michael Angelis: He said.
Lenny: He's rude, too! He's taking Cartman's passengers home, so as to leave Cartman free to steal ours.
Wade: But he can't!
Michael Angelis: Objected Wade.
Lenny: Cartman says he can get them to South Park before us.
Michael Angelis: Replied Wade.
Wade: It's much further by road.
Michael Angelis: Continued Lenny.
Lenny: But Cartman says he knows a shortcut!
Michael Angelis: That evening, the characters were preparing for the homeward rush.
Wade: Where are the passengers?
Michael Angelis: They wondered.
Michael Angelis: Shrilled Lenny.
Lenny: Look at Cartman! He's a mean, fat deceiver!
Michael Angelis: Cartman was wearing a large sign, saying, 'TV Kid'.
Cartman: Yeah, boo, snubs!
Michael Angelis: He jeered, as he roared away.
Wade: Come on,
Michael Angelis: Puffed Wade to his coaches,
Wade: Let's see what he's up to!
Michael Angelis: Wade wanted to pay Cartman out, but he wasn't sure how. Then, in the distance, Wade saw a red flag. That meant 'Danger'. The line here crosses a narrow road, and there was Cartman, wedged firmly under the bridge.
Wade: So this was his shortcut!
Michael Angelis: Chucked Wade.
Passengers: He tricked us!
Michael Angelis: Shouted Cartman's passengers.
Passengers: He said he was an TV Kid, but he wouldn't accept our return tickets! He wanted us to think television was no good!
Michael Angelis: Wade's driver examined the bridge.
Wade's Driver: It's risky, but we must help the passengers.
Wade: Passengers are urgent.
Michael Angelis: Agreed Wade. Wade slowly and carefully set off across the bridge. Cartman wailed as he felt the bridge quiver.
Michael Angelis: He shouted.
Cartman: It might fall on me!
Wade: That would serve you right for telling lies.
Michael Angelis: Said Wade, but the bridge didn't collapse. Wade made good time, and all the passengers caught their rides. The bridge is now mended, but not unfortunately, Cartman and his ways. He never learned sense. He's a henhouse now, and his lies can do no harm. The hens never listen to them, anyway.