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The Aipom Song is a Netflix spoof to The Monkey Song. It is sung by Mitchie O'Hara (from Accidentally Adventures) and Amethyst Giger (from Livin' The Life With The Stereotypes).

Plot

  • Mitchie is on a photo safari with Amethyst, as they sing The Aipom Song. But after the song ends, Donkey Kong arrives to warn them not to disturb his rest.

Cast

  1. Mitchie O'Hara (Stephanie Morgenstern)
  2. Amethyst Giger (Grey DeLisle)

Transcript and Lyrics

  • (We open this music video with Pooh narrating it)
  • Pooh: And now it's time for Silly Songs on Disney, the part of the show where my friends and I come out and sing a silly song. Today, Mitchie and Amethyst are on a photo safari, tracking the tail of an Aipom, or a Primeape. We don't know which, hence the song.
  • Mitchie: (singing) If it doesn't have a tail, it's not an Aipom. Even if it has a Aipom-kind-of shape. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape! If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom...
  • Amethyst: Let's see if we can catch it on the tape.
  • Mitchie: You can very plainly see if it's a Aipom. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape
  • (Donkey Kong dressed up as the Cowardly Lion swings in)
  • Amethyst: Look, there it goes! There it goes! I don't know! I can't tell if it's a Aipom or an ape!
  • Mitchie: It's very simple, Amethyst. (singing) If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape!
  • Amethyst: Uh Mitchie, I'm not so sure...
  • Mitchie: Ooga booga, isn't that a monkey? (monkey chant)
  • Amethyst: Booga looga, maybe it's an ape. (monkey chant)
  • Mitchie: If it's a nickel, or a salad, or a pillow. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape!
  • (Donkey Kong swings in again)
  • Amethyst: If it doesn't have a tail...?
  • Mitchie: Not a Aipom!
  • Amethyst: Are you sure that's what you really mean to say? A camera has no tail...
  • Mitchie: It's not a monkey! If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape!
  • Amethyst: Uh, I think there's something wrong with your logic, Mitchie.
  • Mitchie: Well, Amethyst. The lady at the zoo said it, & who am I to tell her that's she's wrong? "If there's a tail, it's a Aipom. No tail, ape." It's easy! (Amethyst is confused)
  • Amethyst: But, Mitchie! A kite has a tail--
  • Mitchie: Then it's a Aipom!
  • Amethyst: A comet has a tail--
  • Mitchie: It's a Aipom!
  • Amethyst: A bubble doesn't--
  • Mitchie: Then it's not a Aipom! If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom!
  • Amethyst: It's an ape?
  • Mitchie: Exactly! I knew you'd catch on!
  • Amethyst: Mitchie, we may need to talk about this! I don't think the lady at the zoo meant--
  • Mitchie: Shh! (Mitchie and Amethyst both duck while Donkey Kong swings in again) Look, there it goes! In the trees! Follow me! It's gotta be a monkey or an ape! (Mitchie finds Aipom) I can't believe it's true! All this time, I've searched for you! (to Amethyst) Snap the picture! Take the shot! We're among the lucky few! We finally did it, photographer. We discovered what we're after! Let me look! (looks through binoculars) Is it an ape?!
  • Amethyst: Mitchie, this is a disaster (monkey turns out to be cow)
  • Mitchie: It's a Aipom! (subtitles NOT A AIPOM appears on screen)
  • Amethyst: (clears throat) Larry, that's a cow. Not a--
  • Mitchie: That was exhilarating. Let's find more! (music turns back on) (singing) If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. Even if it has a monkey-kind-of shape. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a Aipom. It's an ape!
  • Pooh: This has been Silly Songs on Disney. Tune in next time to hear Amethyst say...
  • Amethyst: But Mitchie, you don't have a tail.
  • Mitchie: I don't?
  • Amethyst: Nope, neither do I!
  • Mitchie: I wouldn't be so sure about that, Amethyst.
  • Amethyst: What do you mean?
  • Mitchie: Oh, nothing! (Mitchie leaves) (tail appears on Amethyst) (jungle animals roar) (Mitchie confusingly looks around & leaves)

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