- Kirby as Captain Mainwaring
- Plugsy as Sergeant Wilson
- Ratso as Lance Corporal Jones
- Wittgenstein as Private Frank Pike
- TV as Private Walker
- Rob as Private Godfrey
- Blankie as Private Frazer
- Tinselina as Mrs Pike
- Radio as The Warden
- Lampy as Private Sponge
- Toaster as Private Cheeseman
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