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The Diseasel / Steam Roller / A Scarf For Percy is a Discovery Kids airing of Thomas & Friends. It aired on December 28, 2002.

Plot

  • Bill and Ben go for the missing cars / Sir Handel confronts a mean steam roller named George / Percy wishes for a scarf.

Characters

  • Thomas
  • Edward
  • Henry
  • James
  • Percy
  • Bill and Ben
  • BoCo
  • Skarloey
  • Sir Handel
  • Peter Sam
  • Rusty
  • George
  • Sir Topham Hatt
  • Lady Hatt (does not speak)
  • Rheneas (cameo)
  • Duncan (cameo)
  • Duke (cameo)

Songs

  1. The Island Song
  2. Really Useful Engine
  3. The Snow Song

Trivia

  • Narrated by George Carlin.

Script

Act 1

  • (We open this episode with the Thomas and Friends Season 6 intro)
  • (After that, we begin the character introduction)
  • Alec Baldwin: Thomas is a really useful engine. Here's Percy. He is a very happy engine. James is a magnificent engine. Gordon is the most fastest engine on the Island of Sodor. Henry is long and fast. Here's Edward always here to help.
  • (A passing by sequence occurs and we begin The Diseasel)
  • George Carlin: Bill and Ben are tank engine twins. Each has four wheels, a tiny chimney and dome and a small squat cab. Their freight cars are filled with China Clay. It is needed for pottery, paper, paint and many other things. The twins are now kept busy pushing and pulling the cars for engines on the main line and for ships in the harbor. One morning, they arranged some cars and went away for more.
  • (The Freight cars disappeared)
  • George Carlin: They returned to find them all gone. The Twins were most surprised. Their drivers examined a patch of oil.
  • Drivers: That's Diesel.
  • George Carlin: They said.
  • Bill: It's a what'll?
  • George Carlin: Asked Bill?
  • Ben: A diseasel, I think.
  • George Carlin: Replied Ben.
  • Ben: There's a notice about them in our shed.
  • Bill: Coughs and sneezles spread diseaels.
  • Ben: You had a cough in your smokebox yesterday. It's your fault the diseasel came.
  • Bill: It isn't!
  • Ben: It is!
  • Drivers: Stop arguing, you two.
  • George Carlin: Laughed their drivers.
  • Drivers: Let's go and rescue our freight cars.
  • George Carlin: Bill and Ben were horrified.
  • Bill: But the diseasel will magic us away like the freight cars.
  • Drivers: He won't magic us.
  • George Carlin: Replied their drivers.
  • Drivers: We're more likely magic him. Listen, he doesn't know you're twins. So we'll take away your names and numbers and then this is what we'll do.
  • George Carlin: Puffing hard, the twins set off on their journey to find the diesel. They were looking forward to playing tricks on him. Creeping into the yard, they found the diesel on a siding with missing cars. Ben hid behind, but Bill went bodily alongside.
  • (Bill passes the freight cars and stops next to BoCo)
  • George Carlin: The diesel looked up.
  • BoCo: Do you mind?
  • Bill: Yes.
  • George Carlin: Said Bill.
  • Bill: I do. I want my cars back.
  • BoCo: These are mine.
  • George Carlin: Said the diesel.
  • BoCo: Go away.
  • George Carlin: Bill pretended not to be frightened.
  • Bill: You're a big bully.
  • George Carlin: He whimpered.
  • Bill: You'll be sorry.
  • George Carlin: He ran back and hid behind the cars on the other side. Ben now came forward.
  • Ben: Car stealer!
  • George Carlin: Hissed Ben. He ran away too. Bill took his place.
  • (Bill and Ben begin to taunt BoCo several times)
  • George Carlin: This went on and on till the diesel eyes nearly popped out.
  • BoCo: Stop! You're making me giddy.
  • George Carlin: The two engines gazed at him.
  • BoCo: Are there two of you?
  • Bill: Yes, we're twins.
  • BoCo: I might have known it.
  • George Carlin: Just then, Edward bustled up.
  • Edward: Bill and Ben, why are you playing here?
  • Bill: We're not playing.
  • George Carlin: Protested Bill.
  • Ben: We're rescuing our cars.
  • George Carlin: Squeaked Ben.
  • Ben: Even you don't take our cars without asking, but this diseasel did.
  • Edward: There's no cause to be rude.
  • George Carlin: Said Edward severely.
  • Edward: This engine is a Metropolitan Vickers, diesel electric type 2.
  • George Carlin: The twins were most impressed.
  • Bill: We're sorry, mister...er...
  • BoCo: Never mind.
  • George Carlin: The diesel smiled.
  • BoCo: Call me BoCo. I'm sorry I didn't understand about the cars.
  • Edward: That's all right then.
  • George Carlin: Said Edward.
  • Edward: Now off you go, Bill and Ben. Fetch BoCo's cars, then you take this lot. There's no real harm in them.
  • George Carlin: He said to BoCo.
  • Edward: But they're mattening at times.
  • George Carlin: BoCo chuckled.
  • BoCo: Mattening...
  • George Carlin: He said.
  • BoCo: ...is the word.
  • (Another passing by sequence occurs and we begin The Island Song)
  • Children: (singing) Picture a land where the sky is so blue. A storybook land of wonder. A magical island just waiting for you. Island of Sodor will make your dreams come true. Imagine a place where the sun always smiles. The valleys are green as can be. The friends that you love are all waiting for you. Island of Sodor will make your dreams come true. Children follow the dream. To the land of make-believe. The Island of Sodor. A magical land where dreams come true. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. The Island of Sodor. A magical land where dreams come true.
  • (We go to commercials after Act 1)

Act 2

  • (We go to Act 2 with Steam Roller)
  • George Carlin: Sir Handel is very proud of his big sturdy wheels. They have brought tires and whole wells to the rails. But they are unusual. One day, the other engines wouldn't stop teasing him.
  • Engines: Look at his steamroller wheels.
  • George Carlin: They joked.
  • Sir Handel: Be quiet.
  • George Carlin: Snorted Sir Handel.
  • Sir Handel: You're jealous.
  • Peter Sam: Don't worry.
  • George Carlin: Soothed Peter Sam.
  • Peter Sam: The engines all teased me about my special funnel until they learned how useful it is.
  • Sir Handel: Did you hear that?
  • George Carlin: Huffed Sir Handel.
  • Sir Handel: My wheels are special like Peter Sam's funnel. I can go faster than any of you.
  • George Carlin: Skarloey had a plan to make Sir Handel see sense.
  • Skarloey: With your grand wheels, Sir Handel.
  • George Carlin: Said Skarloey.
  • Skarloey: You're just the engine to tackle George.
  • Sir Handel: Who's George?
  • Skarloey: That steamroller over there.
  • George Carlin: Replied Skarloey.
  • Skarloey: Listen.
  • George Carlin: The steamroller was making rude remarks about the engines.
  • George: Railways are no good. Turn them into roads. Pull them up, turn them into roads. Railways are no good. Turn them into roads. Pull them up, turn them into roads.
  • Sir Handel: Don't worry.
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Handel.
  • Sir Handel: Leave him to me. I'll send him packing. George will soon get a run for his money.
  • George Carlin: Later that morning, George was at the level crossing.
  • George: Huh! You're Sir Handel, I suppose.
  • George Carlin: Sir Handel was standing no nonsense.
  • Sir Handel: And you, I suppose, are George? Yes, I've heard of you.
  • George: And I've heard of you. You swank around with your steamroller wheels, pretending you're as good as me.
  • Sir Handel: Actually, I'm better. Goodbye.
  • George Carlin: George chuffered on, fuming. Later that day, Sir Handel brought a special load down after the last train had gone. When he had reached the road he saw George travelling home. Sir Handel tried to attract his attention.
  • Sir Handel: Peep! Peep! Peep!
  • George Carlin: George took no notice. There was barely room to pass. Sir Handel was cross.
  • Sir Handel: Get out of my way, you great clumsy road hog.
  • George: Huh! I don't move for imitation steamrollers. You don't know the road. Get out of my way.
  • George Carlin: Then there was trouble.
  • (George destroys Sir Handel's train)
  • Sir Handel: Aagh!
  • George Carlin: Cried Sir Handel.
  • Sir Handel: That was your fault.
  • George: No it wasn't it was yours.
  • George Carlin: Everyone was arguing about who was to blame.
  • (We hear the ringing of the bike's bell)
  • Policeman: Hello, hello, hello.
  • George Carlin: Said a policeman ominously.
  • Policeman: And what's going on here?
  • George Carlin: This made everyone stop arguing. They set to work clearing up the mess instead. Next day, the workmen put up a fence between the road and the railway. Then they went away, taking George with him. Sir Handel thought he had made George go away. He talked of nothing but steamrollers.
  • Skarloey: Oh, dear.
  • George Carlin: Whispered Skarloey.
  • Skarloey: He's worse than ever. I'm sorry my plan was no good.
  • Rusty: Never mind.
  • George Carlin: Said Rusty.
  • Rusty: We'll think of something else.
  • George Carlin: But they had no need to do that. Some boys arrived instead. They pointed to the engine and cried...
  • Boy: Look! Here's Sir Handel. He tried to race a steamroller, but the steam roller nearly beat him.
  • George Carlin: Sir Handel never mention steamrollers now.
  • (Another passing by sequence occurs and we begin Really Useful Engine)
  • Children: (singing) He's a really useful engine you know. All the other engines they'll tell you so. He huffs and puffs and whistles, rushing to and fro. He's a really useful engine we adore! He's the one, he's the one. He's a really useful engine that we adore. He's the one. He's the number one, Thomas the Tank Engine. He's a really useful engine you know. Cause the Fat Controller, he told him so. Now he's got a branch line to call his very own. He's a really useful engine we adore! He's the one, he's the one. He's a really useful engine that we adore. He's the one. He's the number one, Thomas the Tank Engine. He's the really useful engine we adore!
  • (We follow the commercials after the second act)

Act 3

  • (The final act opens with A Scarf For Percy)
  • George Carlin: It was a cold winter's morning on the Island of Sodor. The wind was bitter and the ground hard with frost. Thomas and Percy were cold and cross.
  • Thomas: All I want is a warm boiler.
  • George Carlin: Huffed Thomas.
  • Thomas: Firelighter knows that. He's late.
  • Percy: He's not late.
  • George Carlin: Replied Percy.
  • Percy: This weather woke us up early.
  • George Carlin: Gusts of wind swirled round the shed, tossing flakes of snow towards Thomas. Then they swooshed round Percy too.
  • Percy: Why don't we talk about something else?
  • George Carlin: Shivered Percy.
  • Thomas: Yes.
  • George Carlin: Replied Thomas.
  • Thomas: Like how silly we'll look when our funnels turn into icicles.
  • Percy: That's not funny. Maybe we'll stop feeling cold if we talk about warm things-like sunshine and steam.
  • Thomas: And firefighters.
  • George Carlin: Muttered Thomas.
  • Percy: Scarves!
  • George Carlin: Continued Percy.
  • Thomas: Scarves?!
  • George Carlin: Laughed Thomas.
  • Thomas: That's what you need, Percy. A woolly scarf round your funnel.
  • George Carlin: Thomas was only teasing, but Percy thought happily about scarves until the firelighter came. Sir Topham Hatt was enjoying hot porridge for breakfast. He was looking forward to taking important visitors on a tour of the railway, and had pressed his special trousers.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I shall put them in my trunk.
  • George Carlin: Sir Topham Hatt said to his wife.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: And change into them just before the photographs are taken.
  • George Carlin: Then he set off to catch his train. Percy was now working hard. His fire was burning nicely, and he had plenty of steam, but he still thought about scarves. He saw them everywhere he went.
  • Percy: My funnel's cold! My funnel's cold!
  • George Carlin: He puffed.
  • Percy: I want a scarf! I want a scarf!
  • Henry: Rubbish Percy!
  • George Carlin: Said Henry.
  • Henry: Engines don't wear scarves.
  • Percy: Engines with proper funnels do.
  • George Carlin: Replied Percy.
  • Percy: You've only got a small one.
  • George Carlin: Before Henry could answer, Percy puffed away. Henry snorted. He was looking foward to pulling the special train. It was time for the photographs. Everyone was excited. Sir Topham Hatt was waiting on the platform for his trousers. They were in a trunk amongst a big load of baggage. The porters were taking the baggage trolley across the line. They were walking backwards to see that nothing fell off. Percy was still being cheeky. His driver always shut off steam just outside the station. Percy wanted to surprise the coaches by coming in as quietly was he could. But the porters didn't hear him either. Percy gave them such a fright that boxes and bags burst everywhere.
  • (Sir Topham Hatt and the passengers watch in shock as a box, some trousers and the hat go flying)
  • Percy: Oh!
  • George Carlin: Groaned Percy.
  • (The crate falls on top of Percy, covering him, Sir Topham Hatt and all the passengers completely)
  • George Carlin: Sticky streams of jam trickled down Percy's face. A top hat hung on his lamp iron. Worst of all, a pair of trousers coiled lovingly round his funnel. Everyone was very angry. Sir Topham Hatt seized the top hat.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Mine!
  • George Carlin: He said.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Percy look at this!
  • Percy: Yes sir. I am sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: My best trousers too.
  • Percy: Yes sir. Please sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: We must pay the passengers for their spoiled clothes, and my trousers are ruined. I hope this will teach you not to play tricks with the coaches.
  • George Carlin: Percy went off to the yard. He felt very silly. On the way he met James.
  • James: Hello Percy. So you found a scarf, eh? But legs go in trousers, not funnels!
  • George Carlin: And he puffed away to tell Henry the news. That evening, Thomas and Percy were resting in the shed. Percy's driver had taken away the trousers and giving Percy a good rubdown.
  • Thomas: Firelighter's promised to come early tomorrow.
  • George Carlin: Said Thomas. Henry arrived. He'd enjoyed taking the visitors around and now he felt sorry for Percy too.
  • Henry: Driver says the weather will be warmer tomorrow. You won't need a scarf, Percy.
  • Percy: Certainly not!
  • George Carlin: Replied Percy.
  • Percy: Engines don't need scarves. Engines need warm boilers. Everyone knows that!
  • (Another passing by sequence occurs and we begin The Snow Song)
  • Children: (singing) You wake to the silence the bright afterglow. Now there's a surprise for what do you know. It's snowing. Look, it's snowing. Little Jack Frost has been busy last night. The Island of Sodor is a blanket of white 'Cause it's snowing. Yes, it's snowing. White winter wonderland. Beautiful day. Snow, snow, snow, snow.
  • (Children laughing)
  • Children: (singing) White winter wonderland. Beautiful day. Snow, snow, snow, snow. Snow, snow, snow, snow. Stay, stay, please stay.
  • (Following the last song, we find the end credits with Thomas looking at us)
  • (While they roll, the Thomas end theme plays)
  • (After that, the A Britt Allcroft Company Production for Gullane Entertainment logo appears)

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