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The Mean Girls Who Don't Do Anything is a Netflix spoof to The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything. It is sung by Mel Blake, Brittney Wong, and Malinda Doe.

Cast

  1. Mel Blake as Larry The Cucumber (Stephanie Morgenstern)
  2. Brittney Wong as Pa Grape (Minae Noji)
  3. Malinda Doe as Mr. Lunt (Jocelyne Loewen)

Transcript

  • (We open this music video with Lexi narrating it)
  • Lexi: And now, it's time for Silly Songs With The Mean Girls, the part of the show where my friends and I come out and sing a silly song. Joining Mel Blake are Brittney Wong and Malinda Doe, who together become the infamous gang of scallywags: The Mean Girls Who Don't Do Anything.
  • All: We are the Mean Girls Who Don't Do Anything. We just stay at home and lie around and if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you...
  • Mel: We don't do anything!
  • Brittany: Well I've never been to Greenland and I've never been to Denver. And I've never buried treasure in St. Louis or St. Paul. And I've never been to Moscow and I've never been to Tampa and I've never been to Boston in the Fall.
  • All: We are the Mean Girls Who Don't Do Anything. We just stay at home and lie around and if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you-
  • Malinda: We don't do anything. And I never hoist the mainstay and I never swab the poopdeck. And I never veer to starboard cause I never sail at all. And I've never walked the gangplank and I've never owned a parrot and I've never been to Boston in the Fall.
  • All: 'Cause we're the Mean Girls Who Don't Do Anything. We just stay at home and lie around, and if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
  • Mel: Well, I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at ping-pong and I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall. And I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten head lice and I've never been to Boston in the Fall.
  • Brittany: Huh? What are you talkin' about? What's a rooster and mashed potatoes have to do with being a pirate?
  • Malinda: Hey, that's right. We're supposed to sing about girly things.
  • Mel: Oh.
  • Brittany: And who's ever kissed a chipmunk? That's just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?
  • Malinda: I think you look like Captain Crunch.
  • Brittany: Huh? No I don't.
  • Malinda: Do too.
  • Brittany: Do not!
  • Malinda: You're making me hungry.
  • Brittany: That's it. You're walking the plank.
  • Malinda: Says who?
  • Brittany: Says the Cap'n! That's who!
  • Malinda: Oh yeah? Aye aye, Cap'n Crunch! Hee hee hee hee!
  • Brittany: Aaaargh!
  • Malinda: Yikes!
  • Mel: And I've never licked a spark plug and I've never sniffed a stink bug and I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball. And I've never bathed in yogurt and I don't look good in leggings.
  • Brittany: You just don't get it.
  • All: And we've never been to Boston in the Fall!
  • Brittany: Pass the chips. Who's got the remote?
  • Mel: Here it is!
  • Malinda: Time for Geraldo.
  • Brittany: It's definitely time for Wapner.
  • Malinda: Oh, I don't like this show.
  • Mel: Hey look, I found a quarter!

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