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Thomas' Useful Adventures (2001) - Full is Pikachufreak's fan-fiction thing to make.

Description

  • Here's the full version of Thomas' Useful Adventures, a video released on May 22, 2001. Stories narrated by George Carlin and Alec Baldwin included, as well as one song: Put Upon Percy, Thomas Goes Fishing, Trouble In The Shed, Wrong Road, Donald's Duck, All At Sea and Rules and Regulations.

Opening Previews

  1. Anchor Bay FBI Warning
  2. Anchor Bay Entertainment logo (1999-2004)
  3. Britt Allcroft Presents logo
  4. Thomas and Friends Season 5 intro
  5. First few seconds of Put Upon Percy

Opening Credits

  • THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE & FRIENDS
  • Based on The Railway Series by The REV.W.AWDRY
  • Adaptation by BRITT ALLCROFT
  • THOMAS' USEFUL ADVENTURES
  • Storyteller GEORGE CARLIN & ALEC BALDWIN
  • Directed by DAVID MITTON

Transcript

  • (We open this video with the Anchor Bay FBI Warning)
  • (We then see the 1999-2004 Anchor Bay Entertainment logo)
  • (The Britt Allcroft Presents logo soon follows)
  • (The Thomas Season 5 intro is shown and we begin Put Upon Percy)
  • Alec Baldwin: Percy puffed grumpily into the yards. He was feeling put upon and said so.
  • Percy: I feel put upon.
  • Alec Baldwin: He complained to Thomas. Thomas was confused.
  • Thomas: Put upon what? The rails?
  • Percy: No, put upon with work. Driver says he is too.
  • Thomas: Put upon. What a silly saying.
  • Alec Baldwin: Replied Thomas. But Annie and Clarabel liked it and they sang about it, too.
  • Annie and Clarabel: (singing) Percy's been put upon, put upon, put upon. Percy's been put upon, poor old Percy.
  • Alec Baldwin: Percy is being put upon.
  • Percy: I am, I am, I am.
  • Alec Baldwin: He collected metal from the foundry, coal from the yards, flour from the mills, rock from the quarries and fuel from the depot. Then he delivered it all to the docks. Next he collected some empty freight cars.
  • Freight Cars: Who's this dirty little engine.
  • Alec Baldwin: Cried the freight cars.
  • Freight Cars: We want Thomas or Duck.
  • Alec Baldwin: Percy ignored them.
  • Percy: Put upon, put upon. That's what I am.
  • Alec Baldwin: That night all the engines laughed at him.
  • Thomas: We can see what's put upon you.
  • Alec Baldwin: Said Thomas.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Silence!
  • Alec Baldwin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Percy you done a good day's work. Now get a good night's rest.
  • Percy: Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.
  • Alec Baldwin: Next morning, he took some freight cars to the coal yards. Then he had to push some empty freight cars to the mine shaft. When he arrived, there was trouble. The foreman spoke to his driver.
  • Foreman: The freight cars are stuck in the mechanism. All they need is a good push.
  • Percy's Driver: We'll do it right away.
  • Alec Baldwin: Percy shunted back to were a large canvas barrier was used to protect his line from loose rocks. Percy charged into the line of freight cars too fast and too hard.
  • Percy: Oh, no.
  • Alec Baldwin: Gasped Percy. The freight cars broke free, but ran out of control to the mines below.
  • Freight Cars: On, on, faster, faster!
  • Alec Baldwin: The silly freight cars yelled. Then there was trouble again.
  • (The freight cars hit the pole and we hear a siren and the mine rumbling)
  • Miner: Get out of here fast! The mine's collapsing!
  • (The mine explodes with impact)
  • Percy's Driver: We'll just have to make a run for it, Percy!
  • Alec Baldwin: Called his driver.
  • Percy: There's going to be an avalanche!
  • Alec Baldwin: Wailed Percy. And he was right. Worse still, the track he was on began to crumble.
  • Percy: Oh, help!
  • Alec Baldwin: Wailed Percy. Then he remembered something he had seen earlier.
  • Percy: There's the canvas barrier by the track. That might save us.
  • Alec Baldwin: They were just in time.
  • (The avalanche starts to bury Percy completely)
  • Alec Baldwin: Percy was right. The canvas did indeed save them, but the miners didn't know that.
  • Foreman: The avalanche has buried an engine and its crew.
  • Alec Baldwin: Shouted the foreman.
  • Foreman: We must help them.
  • Alec Baldwin: When Percy had been rescued, Sir Topham Hatt spoke to his driver and fireman then to Percy.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Driver told me how brave you were, Percy. As a reward you will be repainted at the works.
  • Percy: Oh thank you, Sir.
  • Alec Baldwin: When he returned, Percy's coat glistened in the sun.
  • Thomas: I'm sorry I teased you, Percy.
  • Alec Baldwin: Said Thomas.
  • Thomas: You were certainly put upon by that avalanche.
  • Percy: Yes indeed. But just look at my new coat of paint. Now I don't mind that being put upon me.
  • (A nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Thomas Goes Fishing)
  • George Carlin: When Thomas puffed along his branch line, he always look forward to something special. The sight of the river. As they rumble over the bridge, he would see people fishing. Thomas often wanted to stay and watch, but his driver said...
  • Driver: No! What would Sir Topham Hatt say if we were late?
  • George Carlin: Every time he met another engine he say...
  • Thomas: I want to fish.
  • George Carlin: But they all had the same answer.
  • James: Engines don't go fishing.
  • Thomas: Silly stick in the muds.
  • George Carlin: Thought Thomas. One day, he stopped as usual to take him water at the station by the river. Out of order.
  • Thomas: Bother!
  • George Carlin: Said Thomas.
  • Thomas: I'm thirsty.
  • Driver: Never mind.
  • George Carlin: Said his driver.
  • Driver: We'll get some water from the river.
  • George Carlin: They found a bucket and some rope and went to the bridge. Then the driver left the bucket down to the water. The bucket was old and have five holes, so they had to fill it, pull it up, and empty it into Thomas' tank as quickly as they could several times over. They finished at last.
  • Thomas: That's good, that's good.
  • George Carlin: Puffed Thomas and Annie and Clarabel ran happily behind. Suddenly, Thomas began to feel a pain in his boiler. Steam began to hiss with his safety valve in an alarming way.
  • Driver: There's too much steam!
  • George Carlin: Said his driver.
  • Thomas: Oh dear!
  • George Carlin: Groaned Thomas.
  • Thomas: I'm going to burst! I'm going to burst!
  • George Carlin: They damped down his fire and struggled on.
  • Thomas: I've got such a pain, I've got such a pain!
  • George Carlin: Thomas hissed. They stopped just outside the last station, uncoupled Annie and Clarabel and ran Thomas, who was still hissing fit to burst, on a siding right out of the way. Then, while the conductor telephoned for an engine inspector, the driver found notice in large letters, which he hung on Thomas in front and behind. Danger: Keep Away. Soon, the inspector and Sir Topham Hatt arrived.
  • Inspector: Cheer up, Thomas.
  • George Carlin: They said.
  • Inspector: We'll soon put you right.
  • George Carlin: The driver told them what had happened.
  • Inspector: So the feed pipe is blocked.
  • George Carlin: Said the inspector.
  • Inspector: I'll just look in the tanks.
  • George Carlin: He climbed up and peered in, then he came down.
  • Inspector: Excuse me, sir, please look in the tank and tell me what you see.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Certainly, inspector.
  • George Carlin: Replied Sir Topham Hatt. He clambered up, looked in and nearly fell off in surprise.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Inspector.
  • George Carlin: He whispered.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Can you see fish? Gracious goodness me! How did the fish get there, driver?
  • Driver: We must have fished them from the river with our bucket.
  • George Carlin: Replied Thomas' driver.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Well, Thomas, so you and your driver had been fishing. But fish don't suit you. We must get them out.
  • George Carlin: They all took turns and fishing into Thomas' tank while Sir Topham Hatt looked down and told them how to do it. When they had caught all the fish, they had a lovely picnic supper of fish and chips.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Mmm. That was good.
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: But fish don't suit you, Thomas, so you mustn't do it again.
  • Thomas: No, sir, I won't.
  • George Carlin: Said Thomas sadly.
  • Thomas: Engines don't go fishing. It's too uncomfortable.
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Trouble In The Shed)
  • George Carlin: Sir Topham Hatt sat in his office listening to the noise outside. The passengers were angry. The stationmaster came in.
  • Stationmaster: There's trouble in the shed, sir. Henry was sulking. There's no train and the passengers are saying this is a bad railway.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Indeed.
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: We cannot allow that.
  • George Carlin: He found Gordon, James and Henry looking very cross.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Come along, Henry. It's time your train was ready.
  • Gordon: Henry's not going!
  • George Carlin: Said Gordon.
  • Gordon: We won't shunt like little tank engines. That was Thomas' job. We are important tender engines. You fetch our coaches and we will pull them. Tender engines don't shunt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: We'll see about that.
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: No engine on my railway is too important for small jobs.
  • George Carlin: And he hurried away to find Edward.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: The yard has never been the same since Thomas left to run his branch line.
  • George Carlin: He thought sadly. Edward was shunting.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Leave those freight cars please, Edward.
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: I want to push coaches for me in the yard.
  • Edward: Thank you, sir. That will be a nice change.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: That's a good engine. Off you go then.
  • George Carlin: So Edward found coaches for the three engines and that day, the train's ran as usual. But next morning, Edward looked unhappy. Gordon came clanking pass hissing rudely.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Bless me!
  • George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: What a noise!
  • Edward: They all hissed me, Sir.
  • George Carlin: Answered Edward.
  • Edward: They say tender engines don't shunt and last night they said I have gray wheels. I haven't have I, sir?
  • Sir Topham Hatt: No, Edward, you have nice blue ones, and I'm proud of you. Tender engines do shunt, but all the same we do need another tank engine here.
  • George Carlin: He went to the workshop and they showed them all sorts of engines. At last, he saw a smart little green engine with four wheels.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: That's the one.
  • George Carlin: He thought.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: If I choose you, will you work hard?
  • Percy: Oh sir, yes sir.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: That's a good engine. I'll call you Percy.
  • Percy: Yes sir, thank you sir.
  • George Carlin: And Sir Topham Hatt brought Percy back to the yard.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Edward.
  • George Carlin: He called.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Here's Percy. Will you show him everything?
  • George Carlin: Percy soon learned what he had to do and they had a happy afternoon. Then Henry came by hissing as usual.
  • Percy: Wheesh!
  • George Carlin: Went Percy. Henry jumped and ran back to the shed.
  • Edward: How beautifully you wheeshed him!
  • George Carlin: Laughed Edward.
  • Edward: I can't wheesh like that.
  • Percy: Oh.
  • George Carlin: Said Percy.
  • Percy: That's nothing. You should hear them in the workshop. You have to wheesh loudly to make yourself heard.
  • George Carlin: Next morning, Thomas arrived.
  • Thomas: Sir Topham Hatt sent to me. I expect he wants help.
  • George Carlin: He said to Edward.
  • Edward: Sh, sh, here he comes.
  • George Carlin: Replied Edward.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Well done, Thomas, you've been quick. Listen, Henry, Gordon and James are sulking they say they won't shunt like little tank engines, so I have shut them up and I want you both to run a line for a while.
  • Thomas: Little tank engines indeed.
  • George Carlin: Snorted Thomas.
  • Thomas: We'll show them.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: And Percy will help too.
  • Percy: Oh sir, yes sir, please sir.
  • George Carlin: Answered Percy. Edward and Thomas worked the main line greeting each other as they pass by. Percy puffed along the branch line. Thomas was anxious about Annie and Clarabel, but both driver and conductor promise to take care of them. They were fewer trains but the passengers didn't mind. They knew the three other engines were having a lesson. Gordon, James and Henry were cold, lonely and miserable. They wish now they haven't been so silly.
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Wrong Road)
  • George Carlin: Thomas' branch line is important and so is Edward. But their tracks and bridges are not so strong as those on the main line. Sir Topham Hatt does not allow the heavier main line engines like Gordon to run on them. But one day, the way Gordon was talking, he would have tought Sir Topham Hatt had given this order for quite another reason.
  • Gordon: It's not fair!
  • George Carlin: Grumbled Gordon.
  • Edward: What isn't fair?
  • George Carlin: Asked Edward.
  • Gordon: Letting branch line diesels pull main line trains.
  • Edward: Never mind, Gordon. I'm sure BoCo will let you pull his freight cars sometimes.
  • George Carlin: Gordon spluttered.
  • Gordon: I wont pull BoCo's dirty cars. I wont run on branch lines.
  • Edward: Why not it will be a nice change.
  • Gordon: Sir Topham Hatt would never approve.
  • George Carlin: Huffed Gordon.
  • Gordon: Branch lines are vulgar.
  • George Carlin: Gordon puffed away. Edward chuckled and followed him to the station. Every evening the two engines pulled two fast trains from the station. Gordon always leaves first with an express for the main line. Edward follows five minutes later with his train for the branch line. Usually everything runs like clockwork. But tonight there was trouble. A Lady in a green floppy hat was saying goodbye to a friend. It was nearly time for Gordon to start. The fireman looked back towards the conductor's van and saw something green waving.
  • Gordon's Fireman: Right away, mate!
  • George Carlin: He thought the conductor had waved his flag. Gordon started. Leaving luggage, his passengers and the conductor all standing on the platform. Everyone was very surprised and cross. To make matters worse, by the time Gordon had been stopped and brought back, Edward was already late with his train. So now, he set off first. But the signalman at the junction wasn't told about the change. By mistake, he sent Edward along the main line. Gordon was sent along the branch and arrived cold and cross on one of the sidings near the harbour. Next morning, Bill and Ben peeped into the yard. There were no cars for them but they didn't mind that. Teasing Gordon will be much better fun.
  • Bill: What's that?
  • George Carlin: Asked Bill?
  • Ben: Sheesh!
  • George Carlin: Whispered Ben.
  • Ben: It's Gordon.
  • Bill: It looks like Gordon but it can't be. Gordon never comes on the branch lines. He thinks they're vulgar.
  • George Carlin: Gordon pretended he hadn't heard.
  • Ben: If it isn't Gordon.
  • George Carlin: Said Ben.
  • Ben: It's just a pile of Old Iron.
  • Bill: Which we better take it to the scrapyard.
  • Ben: No Bill, this blocks used for scrap we'll take it to the harbour and dump it in the sea.
  • George Carlin: Gordon was alarmed.
  • Gordon: I am Gordon. Stop, stop!
  • George Carlin: When BoCo suddenly arrived, Gordon thought him the most beautiful sight he had ever been.
  • Gordon: BoCo, my dear engine, save me.
  • George Carlin: BoCo quickly sized up the situation and threathened to take away the cars he brought for Bill and Ben. This made the twin behave at once. Gordon tought BoCo was wonderful.
  • Gordon: Those little demons. How do you do it?
  • BoCo: Ah well.
  • George Carlin: Said BoCo.
  • BoCo: It's just a knack.
  • George Carlin: Gordon still believed that BoCo saved his life. But he knows the twins were only teasing. Don't we?
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Donald's Duck)
  • George Carlin: Duck the Great Western engine works hard in the yard at the big station. Sometimes, he pulled coaches. Sometimes he pushed freight cars. But whatever the work, Duck got the job done without fuss. One day, Duck was resting in the shed when Sir Topham Hatt arrived.
  • Sir Topham Hatt: Your work in the yard had been good. Would you like to have a branch line to your own.
  • Duck: Yes please, sir.
  • George Carlin: Replied Duck. So Duck took charge of his new branch line. The responsibility delighted him. The line runs along a coast by sandy beaches till it meets a port were big ships come in. Duck enjoyed exploring every curve and corner of the line. Sea breezes swirled his smoke high into the air and his green paint glistened in the sunlight.
  • Duck: This is just like being on holiday.
  • George Carlin: He thought.
  • Driver: Well you know what they say.
  • George Carlin: Laughed his driver.
  • Driver: A change is as good as a rest.
  • George Carlin: Soon, Duck was busier than ever. Sir Topham Hatt was building a new station at the port. Duck pulled the heavy freight cars whenever they were needed. Bertie looked after Duck's passengers and the other engines helped too. But the work took a long time. Noise and dust filled the air.
  • Toby: Don't worry.
  • George Carlin: Whistled Toby.
  • Toby: The station is nearly finished.
  • Duck: And on time, too.
  • George Carlin: Said Duck thankfully. Duck felt his responsibility deeply and talked endlessly about it.
  • Duck: You don't understand, Donald, how much Sir Topham Hatt relies on me.
  • Donald: Och aye.
  • George Carlin: Muttered Donald sleeply.
  • Duck: I'm great western and I...
  • Donald: Quack, quack, quack.
  • Duck: What?
  • Donald: You heard. Quack, quack you go. Sounds like you had an egg layed. Now wheesh and let an engine sleep.
  • Duck: Quack yourself!
  • George Carlin: Said Duck indignantly. Later, he spoke to his driver.
  • Duck: Donald says I quack, as if I laid an egg.
  • Fireman: Quack do you?
  • George Carlin: Pondered his fireman. He whispered something to Duck and his driver. They were going to play a joke on Donald and pay him back for teasing Duck. The engines were busy for the rest of the day and nothing more was said. Not even a quack. But when at last, Donald was asleep, Duck's driver and fireman popped something into his water tank. Next morning when Donald for water, he found that he had an unexpected passenger aboard. A small white duckling popped out of his water tank.
  • Donald: Now look who's behind this.
  • George Carlin: Laughed Donald. The duckling was tamed, she shared the fireman's sandwiches and rode in the tender. The other engines enjoyed teasing Donald about her. Presently, she grew tired of travelling and hopped off to the station and there she stayed. That night, Donald's driver and fireman got busy and in the morning when Duck's crew arrived to look him over they laughed and laughed.
  • Driver: Look, Duck. Look what's under your bunker. It's a nest box with an egg in it.
  • George Carlin: Donald opened a sleepy eye.
  • Donald: Well, well, well. You must've laid it in the night, Duck. All are for yours.
  • George Carlin: Then Duck laughed too.
  • Duck: You win, Donald. It did take a clever engine to get the better of you.
  • George Carlin: There's a pond near the duckling station. Here she often swims and welcomes the trains as they passed by. The stationmaster calls her Dilly. But to everyone else, she is always Donald's Duck.
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin All At Sea)
  • George Carlin: Percy and Duck like working at the harbour by the sea. On a clear summer's night, there's no better place to be. The big ships bring passengers. Cargo ships carry machinery and other things. Duck and Percy puffed backwards and forwards with the crates of cargo as they are loaded and unloaded by the keyside. One morning, Duck and Percy noticed that the horizon was packed with sails flapping against the blue sky.
  • Duck: I wish I could sail to faraway lands.
  • George Carlin: Sighed Duck.
  • Percy: Engines can't go sailing.
  • George Carlin: Snorted Percy.
  • Percy: Because engines can't float.
  • George Carlin: Duck still had his dreams. Suddenly, they were rudely interrupted.
  • Harold: Wakey, wakey.
  • George Carlin: Hovered Harold.
  • Duck: I'm looking at the boats.
  • George Carlin: Replied Duck.
  • Harold: That's the regatta. Lots of boats, lots of races. Great fun. I hover around in case i'm needed.
  • Duck: Do you go to the horizon?
  • George Carlin: Asked Duck.
  • Harold: Yes and beyond.
  • Percy: I didn't know there was a beyond.
  • George Carlin: Whispered Percy.
  • Duck: Do you go to other places at sea?
  • George Carlin: Continued Duck.
  • Harold: Certainly. I can land on ships you know. Anywhere, anytime. Goodbye.
  • George Carlin: Duck sighed. He went on talking about the regatta all day. Percy lost patience.
  • Percy: Well, Duck, I rather had my wheels on solid ground. Our rails can take us to all the places we can ever wish to see.
  • (We hear a siren wailing)
  • Duck's Driver: That's an emergency.
  • George Carlin: Called Duck's driver.
  • Duck's Driver: I'll check with the harbourmaster.
  • George Carlin: He returned with bad news.
  • Duck's Driver: A man taking part in the regatta had hurt his hand. We're to take him to the hospital at the next station. Harold's bringing him now. Come on.
  • (Duck hurries to the scene just in time to see Harold land)
  • Harold: Good to see you again, Duck.
  • George Carlin: Whirred Harold as he landed carefully on the platform. The man was gently helped to safety.
  • Harold: My job is to stay at sea in case of other emergencies. Otherwise I will take this gentleman to hospital myself. Must fly. Goodbye.
  • George Carlin: Duck set off on his journey. Soon he was steaming well and his wheels were thundering along the track. When they reached the station, the man thanked everyone and Bertie got ready to take him to the hospital.
  • Bertie: You look splendid flying along the line, Duck.
  • George Carlin: Bloat Bertie.
  • Bertie: No wonder they called you great western.
  • Duck: Thank you, Bertie. Percy's right.
  • George Carlin: He thought to himself.
  • Duck: Engines are happiest when their wheels are firmly on the rails.
  • George Carlin: That night, Percy and Duck stayed a little longer at the key. The air was warm and the sea calmed.
  • Duck: There's a shooting star.
  • George Carlin: Said Duck.
  • Percy: Don't be daft.
  • George Carlin: Laughed Percy.
  • Percy: It's Harold. Look, he's hovering overhead.
  • George Carlin: Something fluttered down towards Duck. His driver caught it.
  • Duck's Driver: It's a flag from the regatta. Harold's giving it to you as a present, Duck.
  • Duck: That was kind of Harold.
  • George Carlin: Whispered Duck.
  • Duck: He may have whirly arms instead of wheels. But he seems to understand just what an engine needs.
  • George Carlin: Duck still wonders about the lands beyond the horizon. But I think he knows that, sometimes, the best travels are those we can only dream about. Don't you?
  • (Another nameplate sequence occurs and we begin Rules and Regulations)
  • Children: As you go from day to day Looking for a better way And you think you've got in all under control And so you bend the rules a bit As you try to make things fit But you know you should be doing as you're told Although sometimes you'll find it so hard And the wrong way may seem easier It doesn't matter who you are Obey the rules and you'll go far We all live by rules and regulations Rules and regulations now Isn't it a bore, isn't it a chore Sometimes it's so hard remembering all those Strict rules...codes...laws...all those stipulations Rules and regulations now But without those rules and regulations Where would we be now So you see you have to try and do the right thing every time If you do, then you will come to the conclusion That there is right and there is wrong And the rules help you along And they're really only there for your protection Although sometimes you'll find it so hard And the wrong way may seem easier It doesn't matter who you are Obey the rules and you'll go far We all live by rules and regulations Rules and regulations now Isn't it a bore, isn't it a chore Sometimes it's so hard remembering all those Strict rules...codes...laws...all those stipulations Rules and regulations now But without those rules and regulations Where would we be now We all live by rules and regulations Rules and regulations now Isn't it a bore, isn't it a chore Sometimes it's so hard remembering all those Strict rules...codes...laws...all those stipulations Rules and regulations now But without those rules and regulations Where would we be now.

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