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Where Have All the Staplers Gone? is a Silly Song/Obscure Broadway Show Tunes from Timmystachio

Cast

  • Chowder as Larry the Cucumber
  • Panini (Chowder) as Petunia Rhubarb

Lyrics

Narrator: And now's it time for Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Chowder. The part of the show where Chowder comes out and sings an obscure Broadway show tune. Without further ado, from the unknown musical "Office Supplies," the heart-rending love song, "Where Have All the Staplers Gone?"

Chowder: We don't have much time before the big meeting.

Panini: No. No, we don't.

Chowder: Have you seen the scissors, miss?

Panini: They're in the bottom drawer

Chowder: I tried that drawer but they're there no more

Panini: That's odd

Chowder: I know I thought for sure

Panini: Have you seen the masking tape?

Chowder: It's right next to the phone

Panini: That's what I thought but now's it not I guess I should have known

Together: Ohhhh...Where have all the staplers gone? What happened to our paper clips?

Panini: The ballpoint pens are gone again

Chowder: They're gone again

Together: The stick-it pads have lost their stick Do you remember when...

Chowder: The rubber bands were in their place?

Panini: They're in the middle drawer

Rubber Bands: Middle drawer, middle drawer

Chowder: Light bulbs easy to replace

Panini: Yes!

Chowder: There were always more

Panini: Reams of paper raining down

Paper: Raining, raining down

Together: Legal pads a plenty

Legal Pads: We're legal

Panini: Highlighters in every hue

Chowder: I remember!

Together: Never less than twenty Ohhhh...Where have all the staplers gone? What happened to our paper clips?

Chowder: The ballpoint pens are gone again

Panini: They're gone again

Together: We've run out of packing slips

Panini: Someday my prints will come

Chowder: Please replace the toner

Panini:  Someday we'll find more of

Chowder: Our manila folders

Panini: Someday my prints will come

Chowder: Where's the printer cable?

Panini: Someday we'll find more of

Together: Adhesive shipping labels Ohhhh...Where have all the staplers gone? What happened to our paper clips?

Paper Clips/Staplers: Paper clips

Chowder: The ballpoints are gone again

Panini: They're gone again

Together: The Sharpies all have flattened tips Where have all the staplers gone?

Narrator: This has been Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Chowder. Tune in for act two: Revenge of the Staplers.

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