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You Can't Win - Alec Baldwin (US) is a fan-fiction thing to make. It was created by Pikachufreak.

Opening Credits

  • THOMAS & FRIENDS
  • Based on The Railway Series by The REV.W.AWDRY
  • Adaptation by BRITT ALLCROFT
  • YOU CAN'T WIN
  • Storyteller ALEC BALDWIN
  • Directed by DAVID MITTON

Transcript

  • Alec Baldwin: Duke is the hero of all the engines. This is a story about him. It happened long ago when Peter Sam was called Stuart and Sir Handel Falcon. Many people came year after year to see the mountains and the lakes and most of all, Duke. He always pulled his train, even on days when he didn't feel well.
  • Duke: I mustn't disappoint my friends.
  • Alec Baldwin: He would say. Every morning he took his passengers up the line and stops everywhere they want him.
  • Duke: Peep peep!
  • Alec Baldwin: He whistled.
  • Duke: Please be ready when I come back to you. Otherwise we might miss your boat to the mainland and that would never do.
  • Alec Baldwin: One day, Duke didn't feel well. He was short of steam and needed to rest. His driver and fireman had just finish clearing his tubes when Stuart bustled in.
  • Stuart: Hello, Granpuff!
  • Alec Baldwin: He teased.
  • Stuart: Are you short of puff?
  • Duke: Nothing of the sort. This is routine maintenance.
  • Stuart: Tell you what.
  • Alec Baldwin: Went on Stuart.
  • Stuart: You're getting old. We must take care of you in case you breakdown.
  • Duke: Hmmph!
  • Alec Baldwin: Hooshed Duke.
  • Duke: That'll be the day.
  • Alec Baldwin: Duke couldn't stay cross for long. It was a lovely evening.
  • Duke: Couldn't be better! Couldn't be better!
  • Alec Baldwin: He trundled happily. They began to climb, but Duke didn't mind.
  • Duke: I've plenty of steam.
  • Alec Baldwin: He puffed.
  • Duke: We'll be up in the couple of puffs.
  • Alec Baldwin: But soon, Duke's puffs changed to wheezes. He vows were leaking steam.
  • Duke: It's not so easy, it's not so easy.
  • Alec Baldwin: He croaked.
  • Duke: But I'll manage.
  • Alec Baldwin: At last they reached the station. Duke's driver was examine him carefully. Anxious passengers waited for news.
  • Conductor: Duke is going to take you to the harbour, but he might be late.
  • Alec Baldwin: Said the conductor.
  • Conductor: So two engines are coming to help. You'll still catch your boat.
  • Alec Baldwin: Falcon buffered up in front.
  • Falcon: Poor old Granpuff. What a shame you broken down.
  • Stuart: Peep peep peep!
  • Alec Baldwin: Teased Stuart.
  • Stuart: This is the day!
  • Alec Baldwin: He was coupled on behind.
  • Falcon: Are you ready?
  • Alec Baldwin: Whistled Falcon.
  • Stuart: Yes I am!
  • Alec Baldwin: Replied Stuart and away they went. When the reach the next station, the cavalcade split up. Falcon took Duke's passengers to the boat. Stuart headed Falcon's train with Duke coupled behind.
  • Stuart: Fancy me rescuing Granpuff! This is the day! This is the day!
  • Alec Baldwin: He boasted.
  • Stuart: Poor old engine! Poor old engine!
  • Alec Baldwin: But Duke still have plenty of steam left at him. His vows sounded worse when they were. He and his driver had their own little joke ready. They waited until they reached the hill.
  • Driver: Now!
  • Alec Baldwin: Said his driver. Duke puffed and roared though he was pushing a whole trains' weight before him. The noise echoed everywhere. When they reach the last station, everyone cheered.
  • Boy: What happened?
  • Alec Baldwin: Asked the boy.
  • Boy: They don't usually need two engines.
  • Father: Well.
  • Alec Baldwin: Replied his father.
  • Father: Stuart broke down. Duke had to help him. It sounds as if he had a hard job too.
  • Alec Baldwin: Duke and his drivers' joke had worked.
  • Stuart: Fiddlesticks!
  • Alec Baldwin: Explained Stuart and he vanished in a cloud of steam. Duke wheezed alongside.
  • Duke: Poor old engine!
  • Alec Baldwin: He teased.
  • Duke: It's no good, Stuart. You can't win.

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